Letitia James Not Indicted Again, That'll Teach Her To Continue Not Being Criminal

This round unsurprisingly goes to the New York Attorney General.

Good news! A federal grand jury has declined to indict New York Attorney General Letitia James on a fraud charge for allegedly taking an unwarranted tax break on a second home she purchased. Again.

That’s right, this is not the same federal grand jury that refused to indict James on the same charge a mere week ago. This is an all-new federal grand jury that took a look at the Department of Justice’s case and told the Trump administration to suck their balls, Kyle.

There was a lot of telling Donald Trump to suck balls on Thursday from various parties, which brings some much-needed cheer to the holiday season.

The DOJ lawyer who failed to win an indictment this week is the same one who failed last week. Roger Keller is a prosecutor in St. Louis who has mostly handled civil cases in his career, not criminal ones. But DOJ had to ship him in because every line attorney in the Eastern District of Virginia flat-out refused to prosecute the flimsy case. A couple of them even got fired over it.

But Keller is an outspoken Trump supporter who is known to wear MAGA hats as he wanders around St. Louis like the world’s most divorced man. He probably figured that, since federal grand juries file indictments on something like 99.99% of the cases presented to them — not an exaggeration — this was an easy layup that would get him some positive attention from the dementia victim in the White House during one of those moments when the medication kicks in and he’s briefly lucid.

Whoopsie. Keller failed to convince a grand jury in Norfolk (where James purchased the house) to indict. So he traveled three hours north to the federal courthouse in Alexandria to try again with a grand jury drawn from that region, and he failed again. He’s single-handedly making that old saw about how a prosecutor could indict a ham sandwich look unfair to ham sandwiches.

Letitia James Undefeated Champ Of Kicking Donald Trump In Nuts

The two failed indictments come on the heels of the first indictment against James on the same charges being dismissed by a judge because Trump lawyer/lickspittle Lindsay Halligan was improperly installed as the United States Attorney for the Eastern District of Virginia and thus ineligible to have filed the case in the first place.

The DOJ has now taken three swings at James for her vicious crime of being very mean and nasty to Mr. Trump. and has gone foul ball, whiff, whiff. That should send them back to the bench. But this is Donald Trump, who has made an entire career out of being allowed to stand at the plate and take as many swings as he wants, so who knows. A fourth shot at an indictment, and a fifth and a sixth and so on, would in no way surprise us.

You know what they say: If at first you don’t succeed, keep failing like a stubborn little bitch while everyone laughs at you and makes jokes about your tiny mushroom-shaped penis.

Fine, Alina Habba Didn't Want To Be Your US Attorney Anyway!

Whether the courts will stand for it, or judges will start imposing sanctions on various DOJ lawyers as punishment for continuing to waste the courts’ time, remains to be seen. Honestly, we are sort of hoping that’s exactly what happens, because we cannot get enough of judges sanctioning the hell out of the dumbass fifth-string ambulance chasers that Donald Trump keeps hiring.

But however many swings the DOJ takes, the case will still remain weaker than a baby trying to pump iron. The government accused James of claiming she would use the home as a secondary residence, which allowed her to get a slightly lower mortgage rate, when she intended it as a rental property. The mix-up appears to be the result of a paperwork error, which she had immediately corrected. The DOJ under Trump either didn’t realize she had made the correction or, more likely, knew about it and prosecuted anyway.

Unfortunately for the DOJ, James had purchased the house for a great-niece, who testified she had lived there rent-free since her aunt bought the place. That should have probably been the end of the case, but the point was to make James go through the ordeal of a criminal prosecution, so the prosecutors kept going.

James’s lawyer, Abbe Lowell, put out a statement on Thursday saying that this latest grand jury rejection should be the end of it:

“This case already has been a stain on this department’s reputation and raises troubling questions about its integrity,” he said. “Any further attempt to revive these discredited charges would be a mockery of our system of justice.”

A lot of things should have been the end of a lot of things since Trump entered politics. The Access Hollywood tape should have been the end of his first campaign. The Ukraine impeachment should have been the end of his presidency. January 6 should have been the end of any shot at running for a second term.

Alas. At least we still have the grim joy of watching him lose a lot. This week, anyway.

[NYT]

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