Let's Pretend This Caption Contest Winner Is The Only Announcement Everyone's Waiting On

We had a little caption contest last week, and we went and prepped the winners to run this afternoon, but it almost seems like you're all... distracted, for some reason. Can't imagine why! But since we have it, we will run it, because for godssake we could use something other than Impending Ferguson Doom this afternoon, we hope.

So, let's announce our winner. And this time around, we may actually have a first (we didn't really check previous contests): the bestest caption for this photo of Ron Paul and Al Sharpton having breakfast together came from the Twitter machine, and was submitted by @jsgaetano, as immortalized above. JSgaetano, please drop an email to rebecca at-sign wonkette dot com, and we'll get that tote bag out to you!

And then there are the runners-up!

A special "We have no idea what it has to do with the photo, but it's a Star Trek reference (from the pilot to Deep Space Nine, of course) and we laughed" to Derrick Wildcat, for this:

I was just talking with our good neighbor Quark. He's laying odds that the government's going to fall

Our other runners-up, in no particular order, and none of you get prizes, except of course the valuable "exposure":

Atwater's ghost:

Al: "Son, now have you considered using a relaxer on your hair, it really could improve your image with white folks."

PrinceOfSpace:

Rand, you can't join the gang until you learn the hand signals. Now one more time...

And from Facebook, Frederick Nachman:

That's OK, Rand, I don't believe in taxes either.

Thanks to everyone for participating!