198 Comments

Ta, Evan. I miss all these press briefings. Stupid work.

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Hey Jon, FUCK YOU. I VOTED today straight D ticket primary. Eat Shit, Jon because I did what it takes to save democracy and women's rights.

Democracy v fascism, Jon, you seem to be on the fence about that. I won't even get to war on women.

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You are AWESOME!

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It's the Democratic candidate always must be the perfect candidate ,while the Republican can be any old hairball they cough up.

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Read a Fux headline earlier how Ds are in disarray over Biden's handling of Gaza and how it has split the party. It ALL boils down to democracy v fascism. NOTHING else matters.

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PAB: "THIS IS FALSE ANCIENT HISTORY"

So which is it - false or ancient history?

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AOT,K

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Lots of history is both.

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OT

𝐽𝑜𝑛𝑎𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑛 𝑆𝑤𝑎𝑛

𝑀𝑎𝑦 7, 2024, 2:55 𝑝.𝑚. 𝐸𝑇 8 𝑚𝑖𝑛𝑢𝑡𝑒𝑠 𝑎𝑔𝑜

𝐀𝐬 𝐒𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐲 𝐃𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐞𝐥𝐬 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐭𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐟𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐛𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐝𝐞𝐟𝐚𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐦 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐭 𝐓𝐫𝐮𝐦𝐩, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐬𝐨𝐥𝐢𝐝𝐥𝐲 𝐚𝐬𝐥𝐞𝐞𝐩.

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They must have drugged him again.

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I think you mean closing his big beautiful blue eyes and taking it ALL in....

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deletedMay 7
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Gas must be passed!

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founding

Ms. Pirro sez: "You gotta let me finish here."

Isn't that what Stormy Daniels said once upon a time?

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Nah, she knew her finishing was never on the table.

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Not with his participation, no.

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Your honor I'm just a poor hyper-chicken from a backwoods asteroid, but it seems clear to me trump is too old to go to prison.

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He Just Shouldn’t Be President’: Jon Stewart Torches Biden at Comedy Show

I know liberals say, “Don’t say Joe Biden is old” — don’t say what people see with their own eyes! You can say it, he can’t hear us. I know you know how fucking old he is, and I know you don’t want to say it because Trump is so scary, but he’s so fucking old. When you watch him on television, you’re nervous, aren’t ya?

He added: “I’m not saying that Biden can’t contribute to society, he just shouldn’t be president.” During the set, he also acknowledged that Trump is also old, but as The Hollywood Reporter wrote, Trump’s supporters “don’t live in reality, and he can lie his way out of most things.”

https://www.mediaite.com/entertainment/he-just-shouldnt-be-president-jon-stewart-torches-biden-at-comedy-show/

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Easy ticket to clicks, just like a good "both sider' pundit should be. Besides, it's not like there are Biden cultists to terrorize him. He's basically just doing a typical Tuesday New York Times column.

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His whole point is "Biden's too old, he could die tomorrow." Yeah dipshit, that's true of every president, in fact many have died in office, that's why we have VPs. If your point is "but Biden can die and Harris is a fucking nightmare" then say it, and explain why Harris is such a nightmare. If not, then face the fact that Biden right now is doing a solid job as president, and his understudy has given you no reason to doubt she can hit the ground running if it came to that.

Oh and elections are a binary choice, in case they didn't teach you that at William and Mary--it's going to be Biden or Trump, and we know Trump isn't fit, and while we don't know who his VP is, we do know that one criterion he is NOT using in picking his VP is "that they're very competent, ethical and capable of serving this country". So take that for what it is.

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Well it would BLACK be unseemly BLACK to explain BLACK why these pundits BLACK have such BLACK big fears BLACK about Kamala BLACK Harris becoming BLACK President.

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👆👆👆👆👆

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The fact that anyone on this planet can die at any time escapes many. Yes age is not on his side but brains are no where to be found in the GQP and the orange fucking moron controls them. How they let that happen is beyond comprehension but I predicted it years ago.

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It’s not that you can’t say he’s old, Jon. It’s that I don’t fucking care.

The media has said he’s old a thousand times already. I still don’t fucking care. I care about democracy. Not the number of birthday candles on his cake.

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I'd like this 100 times if I could

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What kills me is that Stewart thinks he’s some kind of fucking hero for telling us Joe Biden is old. Really, Jon? We didn’t know. Thanks Captain obvious. You’re not telling us anything Chuck Todd hasn’t said a thousand times already.

How did you go from edgy comic with insightful commentary to telling the same awful dad joke over and over and expecting everyone to laugh?

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He started believing his own press.

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He's sniffing his farts with Bill Maher.

So he wants us to vote for Trump? Cause there is no one else who is a serious contender.

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Being an asshole. He's appearing with John Mulaney on his new LA show this week. I hope he doesn't elaborate on that shit. It would still be a horse loose in the hospital.

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Mulaney's a disappointment too.

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WTF John, you are no longer helping.

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He hasn't been helping for a long time.

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In my honest opinion, he never really was. He's always been a smug cynic playing both sides against the middle. He's just a lot more obvious about it now.

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There’s a good YouTube video about “what happened to Jon Stewart” that details he was always more of a centrist than we remember.

He gave the Tea Party a platform and treated them with legitimacy while outright dismissing and mocking Occupy Wall Street.

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That's the whole conceit of the "Restore Sanity" rally.

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EXACTLY what I was talking about. And when I pointed that out to a Stewart loving progressive friend of mine the realization made her deeply upset.

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Gee, when Obama got elected.

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I have rarely wanted to kick another human being in the nuts as hard as I want to kick Jon Stewart's right fucking now.

I never will. But the desire is strong and I think I still have my Jaeger boot knockoffs somewhere...

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I'm still incredibly pissed off at his misogynist "Where Boners Go to Die" sketch about Hillary Clinton. Ugh.

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Jon Stewart is too old to be a comedian. He should just go back to his animal rescue farm.

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Add him to the list of people who could've remained beloved if they just knew when to mind their own business (looking at you JK Rowling).

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This.

He peaked before 2016 and should not have come back.

This is just like Seinfeld going out and doing his shouting at clouds thing last week.

We get it Jon, you're old and the world keeps changing and its hard to keep up. Just fucking retire.

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bOTh SidES

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There are TWO choices, Jon.

And you are NOT HELPING, MOTHERFUCKER with this too hip for politics and reality bullshit you're trying to sell the kids.

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still gonna vote for him, but he's really talking a lot of bollocks about campus violence

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OT: You scared, bro? You look scared.

‘𝗛𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗛𝗲𝗿 𝗼𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗔𝗿𝗺’: 𝗖𝗡𝗡’𝘀 𝗣𝗮𝘂𝗹𝗮 𝗥𝗲𝗶𝗱 𝗦𝗮𝘆𝘀 𝗧𝗿𝘂𝗺𝗽 𝗚𝗼𝘁 ‘𝗣𝗵𝘆𝘀𝗶𝗰𝗮𝗹’ 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗟𝗮𝘄𝘆𝗲𝗿 𝗶𝗻 𝗖𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘁 𝗮𝘀 𝗦𝘁𝗼𝗿𝗺𝘆 𝗗𝗮𝗻𝗶𝗲𝗹𝘀 𝗧𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗳𝗶𝗲𝗱

https://www.mediaite.com/news/hitting-her-on-the-arm-cnns-paula-reid-says-trump-got-physical-with-lawyer-in-court-as-stormy-daniels-testified/

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Drumpfenfuehrer's infantile, reactive, petulant and aggressively indignant behavior in the courtroom is going to catch up with him pretty gawd damned fast, primarily because it is going to increase in melodrama, volume, and gag-order violating blatant attempts to intimidate the jurors/bullshit the assembled deplorable audience.

Judge Merchan is going to put an end to this crap pretty freakin' quickly, of that you may rest assured.

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Somebody's not getting paid.

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Here's hoping!

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The jury can see you Donnie!

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seagulls are asshole birbs

there, I said it

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"It's the end o'the world!" *drinks*

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I like watching them grab clams and then drop them in their favorite rocky area to open them. The local crows have learned the trick

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We'd be existing amidst one helluva mess in the event of any global gull absence.

Their gruff and ungraceful character traits notwithstanding those gulls accomplish a great deal in the way of necessary clean up and carrion removal.

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They are beautiful flyers though. When we get a good wind, they soar around for the fun of it. Reminds me of Mr. Dorothea with his skis on and fresh powder under them.

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a certain Jonathan Livingston enters the chat!

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In a lame Netflix detective comedy series I occasionally look at (one of the leads is cute - sue me), there's a running gag about one of their previous adventures:

THE CASE OF THE EVIL SEAGULLS

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Also, too, bluejays are obnoxious. I enjoy observing birbs and wondering which branch of the dinosaur line they came from. Raptors seem pretty tyrannosaurus rexish.

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We absolutely have the loudest-ass mockingbirds on this planet.

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seekrit corvids!

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We're doomed if seagulls ever join up with geese in their attempts to eradicate humans.

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Just imagine a roving flock of gulls, geese, and outlaw crows...

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Tippi? Is that you?

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deletedMay 7
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I might've, though

ask anyone who has returned to their mooring to find a seagull had set up shop in the rigging for any length of time at all

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After the 6th round in Zaire, Ali said to Foreman, “You got eight more long rounds to go sucker!!” PAB’s got at least three more trials to go. Joe Frazier was doing commentary and said “I got a feeling George ain’t gonna make it. “ I got a feeling too.

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And that thought DELIGHTS me.

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Oh man, Ali was merciless with the taunts in that fight. "George! Not punching hard enough, George! They told me you could punch, George! They told me you could punch as hard as Joe Louis!"

Foreman: "I thought he was just one more knockout victim until, about the seventh round, I hit him hard to the jaw and he held me and whispered in my ear: 'That all you got, George?' I realized that this ain't what I thought it was."

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I watched that fight live at the Capital Centre. The first three rounds were terrifying to watch.

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Trial observers said rage yam obviously furious that his mistrial request was denied. He actually thought he was going to skip out of there this afternoon. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

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He's not a very smart man.

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As Fran Drescher said, you don't know anyone as stupid as Donald Trump; you just don't.

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Wasn’t that Fran Leibowitz?

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Could have been, but it amuses me to hear it in Fran Drescher's voice.

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He doesn't law gud.

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He's gud at not being gud about shit.

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Right?! I mean, Judge Merchan doesn't even look like Aileen Cannon.

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You have been nominated for the Nobel Prize for Understatement.

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deletedMay 7
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I was thinking:

[looks at medal, leans in to the mic]

"Nice".

[exit stage right]

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The Nobel Lecture will be a hoot.

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It's got to be killing him that things aren't going as they always have for him.

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Rage yam rages

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Rageyam Shitzenpantz

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Joe Biden calling him a six-year-old was generous.

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Handsome Joe is ever and always a gracious and diplomatic gentleman.

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Merchan is probably more than a little pissed about the MN fundraiser scheduled during Barron's graduation

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(honestly, graduation thingies are usually in the afternoon, and [former occupant of the White House] usually does his hate rallies at night, and he has a private plane - so, assuming he shows his carcass in court the next day, he's not necessarily being extra fucky here imo)

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I believe Barron goes to a private school in Southern California. The logistics would make it an either/or choice. I have a feeling Barron is SOL.

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I read Barron's is at 4:30 Pacific, the rally at 5:30 central. Impossible

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we'll know soon enough, as will Judge Merchan

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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAAHAAAAAHAHAHAAHAHA

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In a closed-door briefing today with members of the House Oversight Committee on “the origins and implications of rising antisemitism in higher education,” GOP Rep. Scott Perry defended the antisemitic Great Replacement Theory.

https://twitter.com/jacobkornbluh/status/1787895241208377617?s=46

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"Defending the indefensible". ~ the official Rethuglicon mission statement

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This bill/gun is pointed directly at universities. They don't give a fuck about Jews. Stop it in the Senate.

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Just another cut to higher education.

No one really wants to join the College Republicans.

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Of course.

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Stormy: pinching herself, “don’t say Yeti, don’t say Mario”

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Takes a lot of chutzpah for Trump's lawyers to complain about throwing aside guardrails. FFS. Fortunately Merchan is having none of it, and told them they should have objected during her testimony.

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ineffective assistance of counsel on appeal?

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No fucking way. That only works if your counsel was literally drunk or asleep in the courtroom.

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And even then, it only works if you're the right color, and even THEN not very much...

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It would take more than this. They're doing what tfg wants.

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I don't think they can paint a senior partner at Cadwalader as 'ineffective counsel' though

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Everything trump touches turns to shit.

Could be trying to throw himself under the bus.

Or maybe he doesn't care anymore.

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Blanche had to resign from his cushy corporate job to take on PAB as a client

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And will probably be fired soon for being insufficiently aggressive. And will probably still vote for him

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because CW&T would not sully their reputation

still, to get to senior partner status there is not a thing 'ineffective counsel' gets to do terribly often, eh?

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deletedMay 7
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He'd getting to try all sorts of whisky, so that's a plus?

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Rage yam's impeachment lawyer on MSNBC saying how unfairly the judge is treating him. Sure, you seem non-partisan. What is the point of putting him on.

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