74 Comments
User's avatar
Zyxomma's avatar

Ta, Evan. I always miss this stuff. Stupid job.

Satanic Pancake's avatar

And here I thought this was a snarky headline about former President Obama and his wife visiting the White House.

Birb-General of the US's avatar

I hope Barry will put in an appearance. He's such an underused resource.

Mary Hall's avatar

Agreed! I hope Biden will engage more appearances with Obama. I will always be mad that Al Gore didn't have Bill Clinton at his campaign events, even though Clinton was still very popular, even after that Lewinsky bullshit. It might have made a difference.

Linoleum von Curmudgeon, Esq.'s avatar

Dark Brandon has negotiated a six way trade deal involving Kenya, Mozambique, Denmark, Brazil, Montenegro and the US. This event will finalize the deal with a signing ceremony.

I won't bore you with all the details.

But the upshot is that on November First of this year the US will take possession of FUCKING GREENLAND! That's what I call 'getting the job done'.

Doug Langley's avatar

Wow! I'm sure the media will rush to tell everyone what a great achievement this is!!

They will . . . right? Right??

Jeff, still got my guitar's avatar

That's awesome, we get Greenland from Denmark for a future draft pick and an "island to be named later".

Linoleum von Curmudgeon, Esq.'s avatar

Actually Denmark gets a batallion of trained Killer Commandos from Montenegro. But the US picks up the bill for their equipment, food and housing. Montenegro gets Guam.

Bagels of Doom's avatar

about time we got greenland.

Mr blob's avatar

According to every completely accurate Mercator Map: it’s roughly the size of Africa. Plenty of space to relocate for climate needs when all of its snow melts.

Bagels of Doom's avatar

and then it's ALLYOURBASEAREBELONGTOUS

IMPOed's avatar

Hope they don't get fucking shot!

Linoleum von Curmudgeon, Esq.'s avatar

We should be thankful the Kenyan Leaders never took up the invite from the predecessor. That could have gone very badly.

"Thank you for inviting us."

"Sit down and shut up! You're going to sign this document giving me sole ownership of all your Vibranium! Sign it right here."

"There is no Vibranium in Kenya. You have the wrong world leader. Sorry. We'll go now."

"Dammit! Bannon told me you had the Vibranium. I'm gonna fire him for this!"

SkeptiKC's avatar

I know that this diplomatic visit is another remarkable accomplishment of the Biden administration.

It is both enormously gratifying and just damned reassuring to witness the fact that virtually all of the decent and respectable world leaders get along well with President Biden, and that it's only a select and detested few of the world's authoritarian bullies who would support the Deposed Despot.

phantom_stranger's avatar

Unfortunately, they also know that there is a chance that Trump could come back, and they know what that will entail. They are still wary of us, as one would tread lightly around a jolly old uncle who is also a mean drunk. They're looking for ways to disengage.

SkeptiKC's avatar

They have to look out for themselves first and foremost.

I would lose respect for those nations if they did otherwise. I am just hoping that the US can redeem itself a bit further still with the overwhelming re-election of President Biden in November as well as a damned distinctive and deliberate Blue Tsunami nationwide.

These Red reprobate Rethuglicon fuckers are FIRED.

phantom_stranger's avatar

They must indeed protect their own interest. That we are potentially adverse to those interests is horrifying. Trump has nearly destroyed the post-WW2 Euro-American alliance. History will damn us for our petty, selfish, small-mindedness.

SkeptiKC's avatar

Despite the fact that he will never understand it Drumpfenfuehrer would nevertheless take considerable gratification for having destroyed the NATO alliance.

Michael B's avatar

Gosh, Joe (Dark Brandon) Biden doin' fancy stuff...you'd think he was President or sumpin...

R. Riddle's avatar

Is this part of the Deep State assassination plot, the birth certificate conspiracy, or smuggling illegal African immigrants past Greg Abbott's governor's mansion? I'm loosing track of all this.

Martin Shobe's avatar

Yes, and it will force everyone to be trans.

Pliny the Younger's avatar

Pretend President to Kenya's President: "Oh, you're from one of those shithole countries?"

PrimerGray's avatar

Zamunda should be next for a state visit. King Akeem has a deep connection to the US and they have neglected the relationship since the G.W. Bush years.

Hm. Now I have a hankering for some McDowell's.

Skunk Formerly Known As Stoner's avatar

Queue xenophobes griping about having a nice ceremony for “shit hole countries” in 3, 2, 1…

Thesaurus Wrecks's avatar

OT: Good lord. It’s like playing right wing mad libs here. He’s just inserting buzzword into a word salad.

Rand Paul Tells Maria Bartiromo That Fauci’s ‘Michael Cohen’-Like ‘Fixer’ Was a ‘Mob Boss Faking Dementia’ at Tense Hearing

https://www.mediaite.com/politics/rand-paul-tells-maria-bartiromo-that-faucis-michael-cohen-like-fixer-was-a-mob-boss-faking-dementia-at-tense-hearing/

Jeff, still got my guitar's avatar

It seems that the e-mails were full of things like "Ron Johnson is braindead", which is true.

R. Riddle's avatar

No. That's why he can't find shirts that fit or someone to clean and press them properly.

Old Man Yells at Cloud's avatar

No, the mall kicked out his "medical kiosk"

Chemical's avatar

Oh goodness, tricorne hat wearing flute players. I've heard jokes from back in the day about how when a US president visits an African nation, they have to sit through a bunch of dances. This is basically revenge for that.

Bobathonic, Dingus Crusher's avatar

I saw a motorocade yesterday that may've been theirs. The car flag was wrapped around its pole, but I think it was the Kenyan flag.

Thesaurus Wrecks's avatar

Biden is hosting lavish parties at the White House so I don’t see how liberals can get upset at GOP Mega honors for hosting Supreme Court Justices at their private getaways.

By Jonathan Turley

Brando's avatar

"Nowhere in the Constitution does it say we can elect a Catholic, so Biden must step down."

Joe Beese's avatar

I hope they’re using the good china.

R. Riddle's avatar

Did they have any china or silver place settings left after the previous occupant stole everything?

Brando's avatar

FDR served the King and Queen of England hot dogs.

Apparently, despite his patrician upbringing, FDR had the most abysmal taste in food.

SkeptiKC's avatar

I always found the stories of FDR barbecuing hotdogs and hamburgers for the visiting British monarchs to be thoroughly charming. The man rolled up his sleeves, dropped ALL pretense and demonstrated how we Yanks like to throw it down in the backyard on the weekends.

If memory serves the obligatory BBQ beers were also served with that meal.

Old Man Yells at Cloud's avatar

Hotdog is Romneybot-3000's favorite meat

jltympanum's avatar

Only if it is on the roof of the car.

Brando's avatar

All the money in the world cannot buy taste!

weejee's avatar

Would that be Taiwan?

Anarchy Pony's avatar

No, that's fascist China.