Marjorie Taylor Greene Made This Kickass Biden Ad, Because She’s Stupid

Bless her heart.

Jul 19, 2023

Marjorie Taylor Greene was at Charlie Kirk’s babbling white circle jerk Turning Point USA conference this weekend, and she said what she thought were some fightin’ words about Joe Biden, but turned out to be high praise for Biden, if you’re not a lunatic:

“Joe Biden had the largest public investment in social infrastructure and environmental programs that is actually finishing what FDR started, that LBJ expanded on, and Joe Biden is attempting to complete. Programs to address education, medical care, urban problems, rural poverty, transportation, Medicare, Medicaid, labor unions, and he still is working on it.”

She said more than that, of course, and the order of her words was just a hair different.

With the seasoned delivery of a third grader whose mom wrote their oral book report in the car on the way to school that morning, Greene ticked off all the ways Joe Biden and LBJ are the same. She said Biden and LBJ are both “Democrat socialists,” because she’s stupid and doesn’t know what words mean.

She said, “Lyndon B. Johnson was the majority leader in the Senate DOES THAT SOUND FAMILIAR?” She positively sneered those words, because we don’t know why. Obviously Joe Biden was never Senate majority leader, but it probably was indeed DOES THAT SOUND FAMILIAR for anyone who’s heard of Chuck Schumer or Mitch McConnell or a number of other men who served as Senate majority leader at one point or another.

We’re sure it made sense to her.

“He was vice president to Kennedy. Joe was vice president to Obama.” Slowly, she was unraveling the conspiracy.

She listed a bunch more Wikipedia facts she or somebody on her staff looked up about LBJ. Then she started saying mean words about how devil LBJ did Medicare and Medicaid and tried to fight urban problems and rural poverty.

And Joe Biden is JUST LIKE THAT! He did Build Back Better! He’s still building it back! Betterly! Won’t somebody stop this monster?

And she honestly goddamn said those things about how evil FDR started these things and then LBJ did more and now Joe Biden is trying to finish the job.

This is what happens when there are raccoons in your brain and you are so oblivious to what normal people are like, so clueless about the world around you, that you don’t understand that the policies you’re so fucking aggrieved about are among the most popular policies in American history.

Which is why it was so easy for Joe Biden’s team to just cut and paste a few things together, add an “I approve this message” to the end of it (and the top of his tweet) and call it a fucking day.

Here, watch the ad, it’s fabulous:

Thanks, stupid.

Greene tried feebly to clap back, but it was just more of her GRRRR SO ANGRY manager-shouting from her Turning Point USA speech. At the end, she quoted the “Blessed are the peacemakers” verse from the Beatitudes, because she’s such a Christian.

Speaking of, please do yourself a favor and read Zachary Petrizzo’s excellent piece “The Standoff Between Marjorie Taylor Greene and Lauren Boebert Is Worse Than You Think” in the Daily Beast. It chronicles all Greene’s blessed peacemaking with Boebert up to now, from Greene calling Boebert a “little bitch” to Boebert’s machinations to get Greene kicked out of the House ~~Incel~~ Freedom Caucus. There was the time Greene accused Boebert of copying off her impeachment articles. When Petrizzo asked Greene about Boebert getting her kicked out of the Caucus, she asked, “Dude, do you do anything besides report on complete drama and bullshit?”

Y’all know how she just detests drama.

She’s so mad right now, about everything: