The most obvious farce on the DC Crime wave was the briefing where the Press Secretary called upon the 'new media' guest and fellow sycophant Benny Johnson who droned on about the crime he's witnessed or been victim of in the capital - including a preposterous story about the Fire Department needing to break down his door to save his little daughter from the flames. Oh, yeah, and his door-mounted RING camera capturing so many crimes. Of course, doing her part in this absurdist political theater she thanked him and said how sorry she was that he and his family had to go through this. Yeah, my heart goes out to him!
Of course, no evidence need be provided. He hasn't posted his RING camera videos nor is any one of his claims verifiable. No Police or Fire Department records. No local news stories.
Honestly, why does the Press even attend these. It's like a victim of domestic violence going back to their abusive partner.
Someone asked recently "why does everyone around here back into parking spaces?" and I answered that they're afraid they're going to be carjacked and want to just screech out into the street. Same as why they leave 3 car lengths of space in front of themselves at a traffic light - in case someone from behind tries to bottle them in and kill them. They are afraid of EVERYTHING. Meanwhile the traffic light NEVER FREAKING CHANGES!!!
Unfortunately this is my state's Senator. Markwhine is one of the reasons our Days Without Being a National Embarrasment Counter is always at zero! Bless his heart!!
Hey, scaredy pants GOP men! I have an idea for you: If DC is THAT GODDAMN SCARY, if DC is really as frightening as you say it is, then GET ANOTHER JOB.
Most of you are wealthy anyway. You don't need these jobs. You don't have to be here!!! It's crazy to stay if you're THAT FUCKING SCARED!!! So...leave! Just quit--be free to return to Oklahoma, or whatever red state you came from, which we won't tell you has a higher murder rate than the place you are fleeing in terror.
So pseudo tough guy with two first names, like JoeBob, or DickBalls, is so ready to LEAD THE BREACH, or something, that he keeps his seatbelt off so that he can EJECT and ESCAPE if he’s carjacked? Makes total MAGA sense.
And yet…the cultists believe them. Despite it being SO fucking obvious that they are crybaby little bitches who couldn’t piss unless someone held their cock for them. Because cult. And FUCKING DECADES OF LIES FROM THEM AND ALL THEIR TALKING HEADS.
I had a brief frisson of hope when Assmouth and Murdoch started bitch-slapping each other, that Rupert would would redirect Faux to report on actual reality. But I’m sure he and PAB chatted in private and sucked each others microdicks and all is forgiven.
The most obvious farce on the DC Crime wave was the briefing where the Press Secretary called upon the 'new media' guest and fellow sycophant Benny Johnson who droned on about the crime he's witnessed or been victim of in the capital - including a preposterous story about the Fire Department needing to break down his door to save his little daughter from the flames. Oh, yeah, and his door-mounted RING camera capturing so many crimes. Of course, doing her part in this absurdist political theater she thanked him and said how sorry she was that he and his family had to go through this. Yeah, my heart goes out to him!
Of course, no evidence need be provided. He hasn't posted his RING camera videos nor is any one of his claims verifiable. No Police or Fire Department records. No local news stories.
Honestly, why does the Press even attend these. It's like a victim of domestic violence going back to their abusive partner.
Someone asked recently "why does everyone around here back into parking spaces?" and I answered that they're afraid they're going to be carjacked and want to just screech out into the street. Same as why they leave 3 car lengths of space in front of themselves at a traffic light - in case someone from behind tries to bottle them in and kill them. They are afraid of EVERYTHING. Meanwhile the traffic light NEVER FREAKING CHANGES!!!
Unfortunately this is my state's Senator. Markwhine is one of the reasons our Days Without Being a National Embarrasment Counter is always at zero! Bless his heart!!
Has he ever tried not being the kind of asshole that everyone wants to jack up?
MarQUAYNE is so thirsty for Hogsbreath's micropeen it's hilarious!
Or any other micropeen the self-loathing bitch could get......
Oh, BTW, North Carolina requires license plates on mopeds.
Come on down here, Mr. Mullin, maybe you'll feel safer???
What a collection of whiners.
Hey, scaredy pants GOP men! I have an idea for you: If DC is THAT GODDAMN SCARY, if DC is really as frightening as you say it is, then GET ANOTHER JOB.
Most of you are wealthy anyway. You don't need these jobs. You don't have to be here!!! It's crazy to stay if you're THAT FUCKING SCARED!!! So...leave! Just quit--be free to return to Oklahoma, or whatever red state you came from, which we won't tell you has a higher murder rate than the place you are fleeing in terror.
They can screw the itty bitty screws in iPhones just as well as the rest of us
So pseudo tough guy with two first names, like JoeBob, or DickBalls, is so ready to LEAD THE BREACH, or something, that he keeps his seatbelt off so that he can EJECT and ESCAPE if he’s carjacked? Makes total MAGA sense.
Ta, Evan. No notes.
Every time I see his name I mis-think it as Markwayne Mullet.
"Donald Trump, El Presidente Microdick"
"Microsoft" for short.
And yet…the cultists believe them. Despite it being SO fucking obvious that they are crybaby little bitches who couldn’t piss unless someone held their cock for them. Because cult. And FUCKING DECADES OF LIES FROM THEM AND ALL THEIR TALKING HEADS.
I had a brief frisson of hope when Assmouth and Murdoch started bitch-slapping each other, that Rupert would would redirect Faux to report on actual reality. But I’m sure he and PAB chatted in private and sucked each others microdicks and all is forgiven.
I hadn’t heard that he’s afraid of the scooters which, gotta tell you, is a while new level of funny. He’s afraid of the scooters.
Hey, a scooter broke my ex's collarbone. Admittedly he was riding it and alcohol was involved, but still
I'm going to houghton in a few weeks. any wonkettes who want to meet up might send me some kinna signal
Does Tulsa and OKC have homeless people? Yes.
Do people in Oklahoma drive without license plates on their trailers? Yes.
Do people openly smoke weed in Oklahoma? Yes.
Are there more marijuana dispensaries per capita in Oklahoma than in any other state? Yes.
Does Oklahoma have a large non-White population? Yes.
No wonder Markwayne Mullins never shows up in the state to speak to his constituents.