L-R: Some rabbis and Springfield Councilors Bud Williams, Kateri Walsh, and Thomas Ashe. Photo by Don Treeger / The Republican Forget the War on Christmas. 2014 is the year of the War on Hanukkah. First there was the discovery of Scott Walker's long ago "Molotov" holiday wish, and then we had
Two rabbis walk up to a congressman. The first rabbi says "Great comments, Mr. Williams" The congressman says,"Why, thank you." The second rabbi says,"Oy, what a schmuck"
Hey, everything goes better with a little Jesus! Remember the term, "Christ on a Cracker"? You can spice up anything if you spread a little Jesus on it. So this holiday season try adding Jesus to any plain old thing you have lying around and you'll be glad you did. Jesus pairs well with crackers, Jewish holidays and even Muslim extremists. You can pick up some Jesus at your local church, chapel or Chick-Fil-A, but always go for the genuine Jesus and not some off brand deity. Remember, Jesus, ask for it by name.
If I may criticize my fellow adherents, why must every Christian holiday be a commercial exploitation? Have you ever heard of Passover Pandemonium down at your neighborhood Chevy dealer? Purimpalooza White Sale at Macy's? Rosh Hashanah Blowout savings at Target?
I Will Be Eaten First.
Wait, it's a Catskills joke.
Two rabbis walk up to a congressman. The first rabbi says "Great comments, Mr. Williams" The congressman says,"Why, thank you." The second rabbi says,"Oy, what a schmuck"
My hometown. And why I live in NYC.
I love those musicals he made with Ginger Rogers.
Just add, "That's what Jesus said" after everything. Hilarity ensues.
Williams is dumb as a bag of Maccabees.
So I guess "Happy Winter Solstice" is out of the question.
Bacon, also, too.
Wait. What?
Gesundheit!
The weather gets cold; the days get short. You can't explain it.
So, if a Southern Jew says "Trust me when I say bless your heart"....
B C D E F G H I J K M N O Q R S T U V W X Y Z.
What? No way!!
But Councilman Williams is trying to make Jews like Jesus.
Hey, everything goes better with a little Jesus! Remember the term, "Christ on a Cracker"? You can spice up anything if you spread a little Jesus on it. So this holiday season try adding Jesus to any plain old thing you have lying around and you'll be glad you did. Jesus pairs well with crackers, Jewish holidays and even Muslim extremists. You can pick up some Jesus at your local church, chapel or Chick-Fil-A, but always go for the genuine Jesus and not some off brand deity. Remember, Jesus, ask for it by name.
Or at least a P.B.U.H. after the reference to Jesus.
If I may criticize my fellow adherents, why must every Christian holiday be a commercial exploitation? Have you ever heard of Passover Pandemonium down at your neighborhood Chevy dealer? Purimpalooza White Sale at Macy's? Rosh Hashanah Blowout savings at Target?