436 Comments

In Rudy's defense, lawing is hard when you don't have cops around to plant evidence and lie on the witness stand for you.

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He has the evidence! IN HIS PANTS.

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So the complaint rested on misrepresentations of both fact and law, which is not great if you're, say, the high profile lawyer who inexplicably makes yourself the face of it.“Do you think that is reliable evidence of fraud in the 2020 election in Pennsylvania?” Fox demanded.“I don’t know, we would find out. We would certainly follow up on this,” Giuliani insisted.

No facts, no law, and a self-admitted fraudulent fishing expedition. That's a disbarment trifecta right there.

At the conclusion of Monday's hearing, Giuliani looked down at his wrist and exclaimed on a hot mike, "You know, I have two watches on!" only to clamp his hand over his mouth after his attorney John Leventhal elbowed him sharply.

Is there such a thing as a quadrifecta?

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Maybe he thought the proximity of a classy dildoe shoppe and a crematorium would get him off the hook.

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i used to wear 2 watches for fun (and protest against constant travel for the stupid job i hated...).

come to think of it, i should do that again.

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Objection! Technically, there is no evidence that Rudy had to know anything for many a long year. I doubt that he has the ability to know anything.

He should have know that putting the police communications in the World Trade Center was a disastrous idea. Didn't.

He should have known that shit-canning Bratton and appointing his felonious buddy Kerik as Chief would expose his own criminal connections. Didn't.

If there is a consistent thread in his bumbling odyssey, it is that he doesn't have to know anything and you can't force him to know anything.

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"I don't know" is already a fatal admission.

You don't go into a court and tell the judge you don't know what you are talking about.

I mean, not in any court but John Roberts' Supreme Court.

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Daddy, where do guppies come from?

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If I could, I would wear five watches to keep track of Eastern, Western, Central, UTC, and CET.

Unfortunately, I can only afford one watch and it's a Casio. Also, too, I've only got so much forearm.

Although, and I don't want to brag or cast shade on America's former not-so-much Mayor, but unlike Rudy, I can do simple math. Addition and subtraction.

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Wasn't wearing a bunch of Swatches a fad back in the 80's?

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Much "d'aw" ing, I think.

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A classic first line. Ta, Liz.

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Synchronize Swatches!

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This is incredibly Boring,I miss the good old days when Rudy really knew how to put on a show.I feel cheated.There was No cheap hair dye slowly wandering down the side of Rudy's Face.

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Two Depends would make more sense.

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