398 Comments
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Ellie still in the mix in 26's avatar

Not a good night for me, and I was hoping for a cute furry animal in TABS this morning....but what i got was CANNED CLAMS?!?!

Thanks, Martini. It gave me the giggles.

Antifa Commander's avatar

Not cool, Wonkitty, not cool!

Doktor Zoom's avatar

And here's the history, for the three or four folks unfamiliar with the canned clams origin story:

https://www.wonkette.com/p/not-quite-deleted-comments-why-is-wonket-trying-to-murder-people-with-allergies

SunMoonStars's avatar

JFC Angela has some serious issues and needs professional help. Can't imagine she has stayed employed long anywhere. Drama queen trolls don't last long anywhere.

Doktor Zoom's avatar

I do wonder where she's gotten to in the last .... OMG, decade

SunMoonStars's avatar

Would be funny to know. She will not survive in the real world acting like that. She's so far up her own ass she can't function.

I've been doing a lot of reading and listening as to why the younger generations are having so much trouble just making it in real life. They cannot handle being challenged or questioned. They have been raised behind computers and devices when humans enter the equation they go off the rails.

Menotsure's avatar

They don't teach that in schools anymore.

Miss Grundy's avatar

Wonkitty??!! You monster! You know what the rule is about CANNED CLAMS!

Menotsure's avatar

I don't blame the cutie cat

For this April Fools Day joke

A Sinister Glambassador

Is behind this monstrous poke

Being teased with donuts

Got me up and woke

But canned clams for breakfast

Would surely make one choke.

Martini Glambassador's avatar

Wonkitty's not bad, she was just animated that way (apologies to Jessica Rabbit).

Menotsure's avatar

...and Bryon Noem?

TootsStansbury 🇺🇦's avatar

Nice one!

The Wanderer's avatar

Wonkitty being frisky!

The Estivating Hibernian's avatar

Wonkitty! You Monster!

Linda1961 is proudly woke's avatar

It's OK, Wonkitty is delivering the canned clams to the Oval Office.

C&A Bongo Man's avatar

Carry on, patriot.

tehbaddr's avatar

The Return Of Wonkette Brand Tinned Bivalves!

Craig Nixon's avatar

Clams, clams, monstrous clams.

Land Shark 🇺🇦 🏳️‍⚧️'s avatar

🎶 Clams, clams, clams, clams!

Clams, clams, clams, clams!

Wonderful clams, monsterous clams! 🎵

Mojopo's avatar
2hEdited

I liked the canned ones. It’s amazing what you can do with Astroglide. Not me, of course.

Ellie still in the mix in 26's avatar

That mean judge just doesn't understand that the prez is The Boss of Everything, and it all belongs to him!

And, again, I ask, regarding birthright citizenship: Will this strip US citizenship from all those Russian babies born in this country when their mothers were here for Birth Tourism, many staying at the vulgarian's properties? Or will "we" continue to ignore that issue?

ElderlyLoudCatWomyn's avatar

I like that Maxwell might have been the brains. It kind of makes sense. She swooped into Epstein's life, and used that access to systematize the child rape thing he was already doing. Kept Epstein happy and raked in tons of money, She helped Epstein realize his full potential as a perv.

Erika's avatar

Today is BLAH; Work is GRRRRRR; The world is FIRE (in the bad way)

I am in my feelings today.

But if that moldy cheeto actually shows up at SCOTUS and blathers, it might make my day, or the whole thing may collapse around me. Now is the time we wish there were cameras in the SCOTUS. *sigh*

Raccoon of Vengeance's avatar

I woke up and had thrown my shoulder out last night. I taking medicinal Starburst and Tootsie Rolls to deal with the minor pain.

SunMoonStars's avatar

Hegseth says Army aircrew who flew helicopters near Kid Rock's home won't be punished. "No punishment. No investigation," Hegseth wrote on X. "Carry on, patriots."

https://www.nbcnews.com/news/military/army-suspends-aircrew-flying-helicopters-kid-rocks-home-rcna265999

SunMoonStars's avatar

JFC

-----------

Karoline Leavitt began: with God. Specifically, with a solemn prayer, shared between her and her staff members just offstage before she started today’s Iran war-heavy press briefing by boasting about killing people who lie to Donald Trump.

"Could you hear our amen in there?" she asked White House reporters, as she walked out, which is not a question you usually expect from a government spokesperson in a constitutional democracy, but anyway. The Lord has entered the briefing room. He is, one gathers, extremely supportive of Operation Epic Fury. It’s a name surely picked out from the Bible.

https://www.the-independent.com/news/world/americas/karoline-leavitt-iran-war-crimes-b2949419.html

John Thorstensen's avatar

Of interest to some: One of my Dartmouth colleagues is a medieval historian. She has been studying how the cross went from a symbol of sacrifice to a weapon of war and oppression, and doesn't stop short of today's Christian nationalism.

Her name is the same as that of one of the most important astrophysicists of the 20th Century, Cecilia Payne-Gaposchkin. Not coincidentally, since the astrophysicist was her grandmother.

https://fas.dartmouth.edu/news/2026/03/medieval-historians-extraordinary-year

I Stedman's avatar

I certainly do not agree with Pope Leo XIV on everything, but there are some things that he and I do agree upon.

Oh, and Evers for President?

Noma Larkey's avatar

I don't know how I'm going to get through today without throwing something. The level of stupid in this country was off the charts yesterday - I'm NOT ready for another day of it. If we had a basement, I think I'd lock myself in down there all day. I'm a gonna try to lay low and keep my mouth shut today. It will be a challenge.

Erika's avatar

I am where you are, emotionally.

I wish us both well

satch's avatar

'Now give us money, you worms."

By your command, my Queen.

PS: I always wondered about the whole canned clams thing. Thanks for the look back.

Brian McCurdy's avatar

The conversion therapy decision is very depressing. I suppose the only thing you can do is go around the Supreme Court and use other official channels like therapist licensing to make sure fewer kids have to undergo it. The same court that upholds the rights of therapists to denigrate the identities of LGBTQ kids forbade the rights of parents of trans kids to affirm their kids' identity.

There is a lot of legalese that I'm not smart enough to grasp here but the bottom line is not enough people in power, including eight justices, really give a shit about the harm that will come to these kids. I guess they figure it's not their department.

satch's avatar

Curing teh Ghey through push ups, cold showers, and scripture.

Sherry's avatar

Imagine that you came home one day and someone had bulldozed your house and had decided to build their own there. That’s pretty much what Rump has done.

For all intents and purposes the loss of birthright citizenship should lose. It is so fatally flawed in all its arguments. And how do you decide that? What a kerfuffle that will be. Can you turn in your neighbor for having a child and just claim they aren’t citizens?

I Stedman's avatar

It does bug me a bit "How did it get this far?" "What are you thinking?" and "Can we find the guys who actually took this crock to court and show them that they are not welcome in court nor in public society anymore?"

Tetman Callis's avatar

In the Dystopian USA, so much news is suspect. On April Fool's Day, it's good to see that The Editrix's stance is, "Ain't got no time for that bullshit."

SunMoonStars's avatar

Be Best at what....staying with a pedo, rapist, racist, lying, cheating, stealing, twice impeached, loser, POS motherfucker, steal from dying kids, hate everything not straight white male, killing people with ICE, no healthcare, bad healthcare info.

WTF are you being best at Malaria being the same POS motherfucker your husband is.

cmd Human Scum's avatar

That Ghislaine hypothesis does make sense. Epstein didn't appear to have the brains to run that whole thing himself, or anything, really, in spite of his high opinion of himself. But gag, that pic of him with all the hair. Definitely doesn't look like the brains behind anything.