334 Comments

And we will sue everyone you know!

Actually that sounds remarkably like the basis for the prosecutions of the protestors at the inauguration.

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He only threatened legal action. Besides, prosecutable threats of actual harm or extortionate threats generally require that it be something that would cause a reasonable person to feel fear that the bad thing would really happen. I don’t think anyone could possibly think Cohen was actually dangerous, except maybe to himself.

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Fixing your chair would be right up Cohen’s alley. Just stick his head under the chair leg.

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Yeah, in Georgia it has to be done by a deputy Sheriff or a process server who has been authorized by the Court. In the federal courts, a lawyer for a party can serve the Complaint and Summons, even though the party can’t.

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What, a warning not to eat lead based paint?

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Eleventy JILLION!

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It’s necessary for neurosurgeons in calculating how much to charge.

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What’s funny to me about that is that lawyers work with paper and words, as opposed to, say, doctors or plumbers. We might be unpleasant or do unpleasant things to people, but disgusting is the wrong word.

That’s one reason I became a lawyer, because what we do doesn’t involve handling disgusting stuff. I had had enough of literally shoveling truckloads of shit out of our barn by the time I got out of high school.

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Or maybe they ACTUALLY share their daughters with each other?

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For thine is the Maddow, the Hayes and the O'Donnell.

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For Ari Melber and Tur.Amen

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My original thought was to write Steve Buscemi, but he's also way too good of an actor... I've got it! Mickey Rourke!

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He would either turn down the role outright, or give an intense and direct Oscar-winning performance. But we would have to do some MAJOR rewrites... I think Liev Schreiber would be better as Cohen, but script still needs rewrites.

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John Belushi

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Senator John Blutarsky libel!

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It does seem to support the allegation about the guy showing up in her parking garage.

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