16 Comments

I think the Scientologists patented that.

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I think I'm a little younger than you Unger (I only said that cuz it rhymes). When I got divorced it was right in the middle of the whole AIDS scare/borderline hysteria. Given that I am naturally prone to anxiety and paranoia...well, you can imagine the outcome.

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the Bible, beatings, and bounteous berating

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Also 100% of people treated by a doctor in one of those evil, communist, single-payer health systems will die.

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How do the gay detectors respond to male flight attendants?

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Sex of any kind is a public health risk. It can involve you in lies, obligations, marriage, STDs, and, worst of all, children.

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Hire a cantor w/ a bell to walk ahead singing "Unclean! Unclean!"

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Can I just swear AT her instead?

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Living 12 years w/ my ex-boyfriend, apparently.

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I blame Reagan.

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Yeah, yeah, yeah....a gay guy walks into a room and everybody practically gets AIDS. Everyone knows that! Not everyone can aspire to be healthy with cigarettes and tanning beds, as in Boner's case; or Little Debbie™ snack cakes and deep fried twinkies, as in Huckabee's case.

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Sorry, wasn't paying attention. What was that last thing I shouldn't do?

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The fact that Michelle is out freely walking around among us is an indication that we have a mental health crisis in this country.

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That's OK. <i>We </i>know that Michelle and her teabagger coquetterie is a public health crisis, and that's all that really matters.

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a debate between barack o'bama and michele bachmann would be pretty cool.

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News flash, 'chele. Sex with ANYONE can be unhealthy. Me? I always ask (and offer) a Sex Resume before getting laid. Plus, I stay away from Craig's List. I'm happy to say that I have NEVER caught a disease since using this method.

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