421 Comments
User's avatar
Mark Linimon's avatar

“faithful colleague” == "keeps kneepads at the ready".

Why So Lugubrious?'s avatar

Mike Johnson:

“Let’s talk about something really serious.”

OKAY MIKE! Call the House into session, then vote, then talk about the Epstein Files!

Sojourner44's avatar

Can you imagine what that weaselly cocksucker would have said if Mills were a Democrat?

fawkedifiknow's avatar

Minimum DEI characteristics just for Republican politicians is that you are at least a violence prone domestic abuser, or a pedophile.

larry gassan's avatar

When One Cory Isn’t Enough

Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

"Let's talk about something really serious."

No one hates women like Republicans hate women. No one.

My Erdos Number Is Five's avatar

Why do these guys all look like villains from Rocky and Bullwinkle?

Enter Ranting's avatar

Republican on Republican violence. Mills looks like an absolute psycho.

Cerberus Bar and Grill's avatar

for freaking real. Every time I see that guy, I think that some poor woman is already buried in his back yard or lying under a log in a forest.

Zyxomma's avatar

Ta, Robyn. I should not have read this while digesting my delicious, nutritious dinner, but I did.

A couple of hours ago I got a group text from my supervisor, asking that we wear purple tomorrow to honor survivors and victims of domestic violence. I'm in.

Dogfather, deluded wine mom.'s avatar

Well, there's another horrible, horrible person (R). Why do they always have beards and smirks on their mugs?

Marty Smit's avatar

It’s the beards, not the psychotic personalities.

SethTriggs's avatar

After reading this again, I want to say:

100% this guy puts GPS trackers on the car(s) of a partner.

Stulexington's avatar

Boy, Johnson sure doesn't do a good job of paying attention.

SethTriggs's avatar

This means Shouty Jordan is a shoe-in for the next Speaker gig!

YaJagoff's avatar

You could have ended that sentence at 'good job'.

Erisian's avatar

"Florida Congressman Cory Mills has been hit with a restraining order barring him from contacting ex-girlfriend Lindsey Langston"

Domestic violence is no biggie to the RINOs apparently:

> "Speaker Mike Johnson (R-La.) praised Rep. Cory Mills (R-Fla.) as a “faithful colleague” Wednesday but suggested the Ethics Committee will investigate him after a Florida judge issued a restraining order against Mills over allegations that he threatened a former girlfriend.

“I have not heard or looked into any of the details of that. I’ve been a little busy,” Johnson told reporters in the Capitol, where he’s been throughout the government shutdown. “We have a House Ethics Committee. If it warrants that, I’m sure they’ll look into that.”

[...]

“You have to ask Rep. Mills about that. He’s been a faithful colleague here. I know his work on the Hill. I don’t know all the details of all the individual allegations, and what he’s doing — things outside life,” Johnson said." https://thehill.com/homenews/house/5556660-speaker-johnson-cory-mills-restraining-order-ethics/

Right Mikey, a TRO against one of your caucus shouldn't count because you don't know the deets. And I'm sure that a RINO run Ethics Committee will not hesitate to investigate a loyal MAGAdroid.

The Fulvous Fuckwad also doesn't think there's a problem since domestic violence of any sort should not be illegal:

> "President Donald Trump [sic] on Monday downplayed the severity of domestic violence crimes, saying that were it not for “things that take place in the home they call crime[.]

[...]

And much lesser things, things that take place in the home they call crime. You know, they’ll do anything they can to find something. If a man has a little fight with the wife, they say this was a crime.

[...]

since taking office, the Trump administration has sought to restrict nonprofits’ access to federal domestic violence grants" https://19thnews.org/2025/09/trump-speech-domestic-violence/

* An occasional beatdown of the little lady is required so she remembers her place and is good for the soul (his, not hers).

* Domestic violence is something weak little men (yes, I'm aware that this also happens within lesbian relationships) do in order to feel more macho:

> "Do you feel like a man when you push her around?

Do you feel better now, as she falls to the ground?" "Face Down" Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

fnord

Eureka's avatar

I hope my daughters never marry.

Erisian's avatar

Take heart. Not all men are total assholes... or even partial assholes. I watched my brothers teach my nephews how to be a real man: polite, honest, loving, in touch with their environment, and in tough with their own feelings.

Ya just gotta teach your daughters the obvious warning signs. Two I've noticed are they are full-blown narcissists (like the kind of asshole, ie our beloved Sociopathic Narcissist-in-Chief), and two -- which is a much more telling sign IMO -- is that they belittle everyone they can to the woman trying to make themselves look big while saying things like that person needs the crap knocked out of them, it's the only way they will learn; or that their wife would ***never*** act like that in public with all the implications out in the open (and obviously these aren't close to all of the tells).

fnord

Why So Lugubrious?'s avatar

I, for one, am a colon. Welllll, a semi-colon.

Cerberus Bar and Grill's avatar

OR...if my daughters married other women. That'd be a-okay by me.

Goonemeritus's avatar

I don't have porn of anyone I dated, am I doing it wrong?

YaJagoff's avatar

It helps to have a cameraman handy.

Goonemeritus's avatar

There aren't many angles where I would be considered conventionally handsome.

Enter Ranting's avatar

It's all about the lighting.

fair_n_hite_451's avatar

That would be the problem with me posting revenge porn of anyone I've been with. I'd be in it ... and then it's not porn, it's just masochism to have to watch it ;-)