Often when an animal's common name starts with 'red', there's an implied 'sorta' – but not with this guy! No wonder he's disgruntled, he's got to hide buried in the sand to catch anything to eat.
It's like the face of one of those DMV clerks, the type that just stands there impassively, not saying a single word until you state your business, but at a Star Fleet spaceship licencing facility...
The "If I 𝘮𝘶𝘴𝘵" is implied, the stately dignity makes it work. "Next"...
Picking Albert Pike as the Confederate general to rehabilitate is SO in brand for MAGA. The Confederates themselves cashiered him. He was basically an incompetent general, but Jefferson Davis was highly tolerant of incompetent generalship if the general was good at politics,...at least the right kind of politics.
And Pike WAS effective at militarily-relevant politics. He convinced the Indian tribes to back the Confederacy.
So what was Pike cashiered for? Corruption. He was crooked as fuck. And also big on projection, accusing those who tried to expose his shit of beg the corrupt ones.
And aren't corruption and projection the true defining characteristics of MAGA public figures?
HuffPost: Close Biden Aide Anita Dunn Testifies On Former President’s Cognitive Ability
"In a closed-door hearing with the House Oversight Committee, former senior advisor to the president Anita Dunn began answering questions about former President Joe Biden’s cognitive ability, led by the panel’s Republicans.
Dunn pushed back on the so-called “autopen scandal” that Trump has been promoting since retaking the White House. The current president alleges his predecessor “doesn’t know he’s alive” and was manipulated by staff into adding his signature to executive orders and other documents with an autopen device that has been used in the past by other leaders.
“While I observed that President Biden aged physically during his time in office, which is something that happens to every President, he remained throughout my interactions with him fully engaged and clear in his directions and supervision,” Dunn said in her opening statement, which was provided to Axios and others. “His ability to probe, to find the weakness in an argument, and to make well‑informed decisions, did not change during my time in the White House,” Dunn said.
She noted Biden relied on senior advisors “as is typical and necessary” for the role of the president in order to “allow the White House to run effectively,” but that Biden's "authority and involvement in decision making was clear.”"
If you are hunting an animal and said animal attacks you? It wasn't unprovoked. It was very provoked. Animals are smart. The buffalo may not have understood the totality of the threat, but it knew it was being threatened.
That eHarmony video . . . what the fuck did I watch? It’s kind of cool that a 14 year old already has her MBA, but what the fuck did I just watch? That has to be a spoof. Right? Right!?
It’s your hed gif source info: https://martiniambassador.substack.com/p/grumpy-and-puffy
And meme chat: https://open.substack.com/chat/posts/3cfe4e81-1463-41d5-bfcc-eb9139339593?utm_source=share
Judgmental fish doesn't like you.
DISAPPROVING FISH IS DISAPPROVING
Clearly, that is a what-the-fuck-am-I-reading fish. Our spirit animal!
We no longer have Grumpy Cat 😔 (peace be unto her) but now we have Grumpy Fitsch!
Often when an animal's common name starts with 'red', there's an implied 'sorta' – but not with this guy! No wonder he's disgruntled, he's got to hide buried in the sand to catch anything to eat.
like a red red robin that comes bop bop boppin' along? They are ERNGE!!!!!!
Other than the color, how is that not Barney?
Puffer fish looks like he's made from styrofoam. But that has been my resting face since The Idiot From Queens got back into the Oval.
I can’t even remember what “resting” is anymore.
Au contraire- looks to me like a Muppet. That skin is definitely some sort of nubbly cloth fabric
Play doh animated by dark sorcery
Elder Play Doh.
BRING ME MY SHOGGOTHS!
Hypno Fish!
ALL HAIL HYPNOTOAD
Disapproving Fish is very disappointed in you.
If I wanted that, I'd just visit my mom.
That Red Congo Puffer's face!
It's like the face of one of those DMV clerks, the type that just stands there impassively, not saying a single word until you state your business, but at a Star Fleet spaceship licencing facility...
The "If I 𝘮𝘶𝘴𝘵" is implied, the stately dignity makes it work. "Next"...
“Now fill out *this* form, and go wait in *that* line over there ... NEXT!”
Very cute, cuttley!
Ooops is actually Prickle Balloon!
When I saw the header picture this morning with the big orange blob of a face, my thoughts immediately went elsewhere...
The red little puffer
Says he cannot suffer
Your happy-faced joys and glees
He likes things quite glum
So just buzz off, chum
And leave him in grumpy unease.
simply brilliant....
I hope you're keeping all of these to put in a book. Which I would buy.
Nice idea. Maybe Martini and I could slap together a children's book of animal facts and accompanying rhymes.
I can imagine marketing it as the book you would happily read to your kid every single night for two weeks.
/golf clap
(applauds)
Puff Baddy is serious fish.
Aquarium advice is "Best kept alone as they do not tolerate tank mates well."
C DIddy.
Puffer the little children and forbid them not.
Oh, Dinsdaaaaaaale!
epsom salt - ha!
I'm pretty sure that Gen. Pike was only referring to members of the White Race who also had White penises.
If the woman in that video wasn't 50 years too young for me, she's my ideal!
~~FEMA employees reassigned to ICE “to assist with hiring and vetting”
You know: de-worming, flea dips, micro-chipping. Probably too much to expect, though, to hope for spaying & neutering...
Can you imagine being in the throes of passionate sex with Ms. Eharmony and have a cat meow outside the window.
It could be the greatest of the worst sex you've ever had.
Not unprovoked. Self-defense.
Picking Albert Pike as the Confederate general to rehabilitate is SO in brand for MAGA. The Confederates themselves cashiered him. He was basically an incompetent general, but Jefferson Davis was highly tolerant of incompetent generalship if the general was good at politics,...at least the right kind of politics.
And Pike WAS effective at militarily-relevant politics. He convinced the Indian tribes to back the Confederacy.
So what was Pike cashiered for? Corruption. He was crooked as fuck. And also big on projection, accusing those who tried to expose his shit of beg the corrupt ones.
And aren't corruption and projection the true defining characteristics of MAGA public figures?
HuffPost: Close Biden Aide Anita Dunn Testifies On Former President’s Cognitive Ability
"In a closed-door hearing with the House Oversight Committee, former senior advisor to the president Anita Dunn began answering questions about former President Joe Biden’s cognitive ability, led by the panel’s Republicans.
Dunn pushed back on the so-called “autopen scandal” that Trump has been promoting since retaking the White House. The current president alleges his predecessor “doesn’t know he’s alive” and was manipulated by staff into adding his signature to executive orders and other documents with an autopen device that has been used in the past by other leaders.
“While I observed that President Biden aged physically during his time in office, which is something that happens to every President, he remained throughout my interactions with him fully engaged and clear in his directions and supervision,” Dunn said in her opening statement, which was provided to Axios and others. “His ability to probe, to find the weakness in an argument, and to make well‑informed decisions, did not change during my time in the White House,” Dunn said.
She noted Biden relied on senior advisors “as is typical and necessary” for the role of the president in order to “allow the White House to run effectively,” but that Biden's "authority and involvement in decision making was clear.”"
I wouldn't want to be Jake "Tapped Out" Tapper right now
If you are hunting an animal and said animal attacks you? It wasn't unprovoked. It was very provoked. Animals are smart. The buffalo may not have understood the totality of the threat, but it knew it was being threatened.
One thing about “the greatest generation” is that they had a few effective ways to deal with fascists and Nazis. We should learn from our past.
Fuck, I’m epsom salt? That’s some serious bullshit.
I got sel gris...not super thrilled with it, either 😂
I am Epsom Salt too. Pragmatic but I wish I could see the cards for the other Salts. Here is the card for Epsom Salt: https://substack.com/profile/13992002-cynmac/note/c-143198435
eta: there is an option to see all the archetypes on the same screen as the option to download your Salt Card.
Most of mine was accurate, except for resting bitch face. I tend to be smiling at some stupid shit going through my mind most of the time.
I can have resting bitch face with certain people, and they know who they are.
You too? I was a little distressed at that. I mean, I know I wouldn't be kosher salt, but epsom?
Come on, man!
That eHarmony video . . . what the fuck did I watch? It’s kind of cool that a 14 year old already has her MBA, but what the fuck did I just watch? That has to be a spoof. Right? Right!?
Her "10 accents" video is hilarious.
Re: problematic greatest generation. So, racism, alcoholism, and domestic abuse are over now that they're gone? Howdid I miss that?
I am Epsom salt. Apparently, you, Kosher salt, are my arch enemy. Bummer.
That salt thing is nuts. I am table salt. I probably should have guessed that.