Sigh; why do men have to be so weird? All I need is a woman who’s minimum 6 foot 6 inches, can lift me with one hand, and has a hard that’s as soft as her muscles are rock hard. Is that too much to ask?
The manosphere / podcast bros whole grift is telling men what they want to hear, which is that all the women that keep rejecting them so unfairly are going to get their comeuppance and deeply regret squandering their "sexual marketplace value" when they were in their 20s. That's where the idea of hypergamy comes in - we women are all "dating up" and rejecting 90% of men, even if we're not in that elite top 10% ourselves.
I also think that certain men need to feel like they're the providers not just because that's the only thing they have to offer but because they really don't like women. And they actually prefer or even need a transactional relationship where their girlfriend or wife is financially dependent on them and can't leave them no matter how awful they are to them. So it's less, "what do I have to offer if you already have your own house?" and more "How can I trap you if you have the option to leave?"
Not just men. I bought my first house when I was in my 20s. I called mom to tell her the good news, she was working as a school secretary at the time. One teacher she told said, 'she bought a house? But she's not married.' A teacher much younger than mom who would have grown up with feminism.
Full disclosure: my girlfriend owns the house we live in, and I help out with the finances. I wonder if these insecure men are present in high concentrations on dating apps because they are not in relationships, and they are not in relationships because they are insecure...
My ex is pretty tall - around 5'10" - and her "new guy"* is at least six inches shorter. One of the things she likes about him is that he doesn't give a shit that he's a short guy and doesn't feel weird about dating taller women. Case in point, his ex-wife is just over six feet.
*relative to me, they've been together for a decade plus
I’m the opposite, barely 5’0” so I have never dated a man shorter than me. What I have experienced is hate from other women when dating taller men. I “took them away” from the tall ladies and should “stick to the short ones” to make things fair.
I’m on the lower end of income but I own my home because I inherited it. Even still- I despise the idea of dating someone for economic security. I don’t want them dependent on me either. Honestly- I want a guy who has his own place and I have mine. Not interested in giving up my bedroom, my finances, how I keep hobbies tucked away to not interfere with theirs, etc. I’m also in my 50’s, have had my kids - I just see zero point in joining households. Friends and family give medical care if needed.
Run if some dude is just so offended he can’t go into some debt situation that could work against you in court later at a divorce. If he is secure, loves you, he’s not gonna care if your name is on the mortgage only.
We really need to rethink how people couple financially. I think more and more it should be case by case not expected everyone will automatically join in mortgage, loans, etc
So much to unpack here! My GF is better off financially than I. I stupidly went into teaching in order to "change the world one kid at a time". (We can see how well that's worked out). Also the educational system in my state and I don't get a long so well, and my STRS does not add up to much. She's been the main produce buyer for our local food coop for 25 years, for which she is paid in the mid $20/hour, and her mom is generous to both of her daughters with her profits from her stocks. I would not have the lifestyle I have without the both of them. PLUS my GF is amazingly talented, smart, and beautiful (same as me. lol). So wins all around. We can't afford to buy a home, but we do get to travel now and then, and I fix-up what we can afford to make the place more livable. So there is a trade-off, just as there should be in a partnership, just not along traditional gender-specific lines. We have zero kids by choice. I had enough to deal with in the classroom.
Every time I read an article like this, I am more and more grateful for my beloved, who takes care of his health but has a comfortable tummy, whose income is not really any of my business since we don't live together, who loves my brain, who was almost more excited than I was when I was able to buy my own home, and who has supported, held, and comforted me through sad and scary times without restraint.
This reeks of man bashing. (I'm female.) I work in the sciences and I haven't met one man like the one you describe. My husband commented 46 years ago that he's happy I am financially independent through education because it makes his life easier. He's not an anomaly in my world. Where are you gals hanging out???
Oh please. All you need to do is spend 10 minutes on YouTube to find men like those described.
No one - NO ONE - says it's all men. But it's a trend.
And despite your "how do you do, fellow females..." you can fuck all the way off with that bullshit "man bashing" response to anything even remotely critical of the manosphere.
Sigh; why do men have to be so weird? All I need is a woman who’s minimum 6 foot 6 inches, can lift me with one hand, and has a hard that’s as soft as her muscles are rock hard. Is that too much to ask?
The manosphere / podcast bros whole grift is telling men what they want to hear, which is that all the women that keep rejecting them so unfairly are going to get their comeuppance and deeply regret squandering their "sexual marketplace value" when they were in their 20s. That's where the idea of hypergamy comes in - we women are all "dating up" and rejecting 90% of men, even if we're not in that elite top 10% ourselves.
I also think that certain men need to feel like they're the providers not just because that's the only thing they have to offer but because they really don't like women. And they actually prefer or even need a transactional relationship where their girlfriend or wife is financially dependent on them and can't leave them no matter how awful they are to them. So it's less, "what do I have to offer if you already have your own house?" and more "How can I trap you if you have the option to leave?"
Not just men. I bought my first house when I was in my 20s. I called mom to tell her the good news, she was working as a school secretary at the time. One teacher she told said, 'she bought a house? But she's not married.' A teacher much younger than mom who would have grown up with feminism.
Full disclosure: my girlfriend owns the house we live in, and I help out with the finances. I wonder if these insecure men are present in high concentrations on dating apps because they are not in relationships, and they are not in relationships because they are insecure...
I don't have a six-pack. More like a keg.
I can make my own sandwich. And for you too, LADIES!!
Weird...
Fuckin' weirdos.
My ex is pretty tall - around 5'10" - and her "new guy"* is at least six inches shorter. One of the things she likes about him is that he doesn't give a shit that he's a short guy and doesn't feel weird about dating taller women. Case in point, his ex-wife is just over six feet.
*relative to me, they've been together for a decade plus
I’m the opposite, barely 5’0” so I have never dated a man shorter than me. What I have experienced is hate from other women when dating taller men. I “took them away” from the tall ladies and should “stick to the short ones” to make things fair.
I’m on the lower end of income but I own my home because I inherited it. Even still- I despise the idea of dating someone for economic security. I don’t want them dependent on me either. Honestly- I want a guy who has his own place and I have mine. Not interested in giving up my bedroom, my finances, how I keep hobbies tucked away to not interfere with theirs, etc. I’m also in my 50’s, have had my kids - I just see zero point in joining households. Friends and family give medical care if needed.
Run if some dude is just so offended he can’t go into some debt situation that could work against you in court later at a divorce. If he is secure, loves you, he’s not gonna care if your name is on the mortgage only.
We really need to rethink how people couple financially. I think more and more it should be case by case not expected everyone will automatically join in mortgage, loans, etc
what sort of 'hobbies' are these? all 'tucked away'? A Taxidermy hobby?
All those SF tech-bros have is their "money" and their "careers." Without those being the big draw, what else could they bring to a relationship?
Small minds, big egos, and teeny peens.
Women want partners who respect them and their ambitions. Period.
who respect you for your ambitions and your periods? i think that is asking a lot.
Yes. I don't understand why these men are so insecure about being equal or lesser? Does it make their peens shrink or something?
Crosseyed and homeless is the ideal woman, apparently.
So much to unpack here! My GF is better off financially than I. I stupidly went into teaching in order to "change the world one kid at a time". (We can see how well that's worked out). Also the educational system in my state and I don't get a long so well, and my STRS does not add up to much. She's been the main produce buyer for our local food coop for 25 years, for which she is paid in the mid $20/hour, and her mom is generous to both of her daughters with her profits from her stocks. I would not have the lifestyle I have without the both of them. PLUS my GF is amazingly talented, smart, and beautiful (same as me. lol). So wins all around. We can't afford to buy a home, but we do get to travel now and then, and I fix-up what we can afford to make the place more livable. So there is a trade-off, just as there should be in a partnership, just not along traditional gender-specific lines. We have zero kids by choice. I had enough to deal with in the classroom.
Every time I read an article like this, I am more and more grateful for my beloved, who takes care of his health but has a comfortable tummy, whose income is not really any of my business since we don't live together, who loves my brain, who was almost more excited than I was when I was able to buy my own home, and who has supported, held, and comforted me through sad and scary times without restraint.
THAT'S a "real man."
“If you buy that persimmon, what’s a guy going to do for you?”
“If you brush your teeth, what’s a guy going to do for you?”
“If you tune your guitar, what’s a guy going to do for you?”
Makes as much sense as the original question.
This reeks of man bashing. (I'm female.) I work in the sciences and I haven't met one man like the one you describe. My husband commented 46 years ago that he's happy I am financially independent through education because it makes his life easier. He's not an anomaly in my world. Where are you gals hanging out???
Oh please. All you need to do is spend 10 minutes on YouTube to find men like those described.
No one - NO ONE - says it's all men. But it's a trend.
And despite your "how do you do, fellow females..." you can fuck all the way off with that bullshit "man bashing" response to anything even remotely critical of the manosphere.
Good point. Thank you!. Yes, there are scumbag guys like that out there, but they are thankfully a very small percentage of men.