New Senate Dress Code Lets John Fetterman Wear Shorts, Susan Collins Rock A Bikini
It's a MAD HOUSE!
Sen. John Fetterman — the real one, not his “Paul Is Dead” body double — has been spotted on the Senate floor wearing a hoodie and shorts. There’s no need to call the fashion police, though, because Majority Leader Chuck Schumer confirmed last weekend that he’s directed the sergeant of arms not to enforce the Senate’s informal dress code.
“Senators are able to choose what they wear on the Senate floor,” he said. “I will continue to wear a suit.” No, shorts for Chuckie!
Unfortunately, the relaxed rules only apply to senators. Senate staff must still show up in business attire. That’s not cool. Let’s hope they offer free dry cleaning services.
Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene, who compared House Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s mask mandates to the Holocaust, was suddenly the ultimate rule follower and declared Sunday on Xitter, “The Senate no longer enforcing a dress code for Senators to appease Fetterman is disgraceful. Dress code is one of society’s standards that set etiquette and respect for our institutions. Stop lowering the bar!”
A congressional dress code didn’t keep Greene from calling Rep. Lauren Boebert “a little bitch” on the House floor or prevent the two Jane Austen characters from having a throw down in a House bathroom.
No, the institutional bar was lowered to subterranean depths when these two knuckleheads were sworn into the House.
As Fetterman himself noted, Greene has entered pictures of Hunter Biden’s penis into the congressional record. But I guess she was dressed appropriately at the time.
David Urban, chief of staff for former Sen. Arlen Specter, lamented the change: “It’s serious work you’re doing in the Senate. You’re not gardening. You’re running the nation.”
Gardeners in fact do serious work and are more serious about it than professional Twitter troll Ted Cruz.
Failing presidential candidate Ron DeSantis subjected us to his opinion, as well.
“The US Senate just eliminated its dress code because you got this guy from Pennsylvania [Fetterman] — who's got a lot of problems [...] he wears, like, sweatshirts and hoodies and shorts [...]. We need to be lifting up our standards in this country, not dumbing down.”
Fetterman clapped back, “I dress like he campaigns.”
Used car salesman and all around creep Matt Gaetz whined about Fetterman’s clothing style to Steve Bannon, who looks like the inside of a gas station bathroom at 4 a.m. Fetterman responded, “Government shutdown in t-minus 16 days. Instead of crying about how I dress, how about you get your shit together and do your job, bud?”
Sen. Markwayne Mullin called Fetterman not wearing a suit “completely disrespectful” and Sen. Bill Hagerty told Fox News’s Maria Bartiromo that casual wear is somehow a Democratic plot to “transform America” — apparently into a typical tech firm’s board room.
There were some absolutely unhinged responses from other Republican senators. Mike Lee shamelessly linked the loss of an F-35 jet to the relaxed Senate dress code.
“I wonder if the pilot was wearing a hoodie,” Lee posted, but his snark reveals the larger issue: the absurd notion that how one dresses is a reflection of their competence. Wearing a suit to play basketball is probably not effective but someone could easily do a senator’s job while wearing basketball shorts. According to Mitt Romney, most of the senators who do wear suits are do-nothing attention seekers anyway.
Republican Sen. Lisa Murkowski was reasonably chill with the looser dress code.
“I’m not so hung up on things to think that every single day a man needs to wear a neck tie,” she said. “If I had my way, we would have summer casual for men so we didn’t have the air conditioning so low and spend so much money keeping this place cold.”
But Sen. Susan Collins was, of course, very concerned about changing the Senate dress code, which she insists “debases the institution.” Lady, one of your colleagues is jeopardizing military readiness in an attempt to obstruct women military personnel from accessing health care, but I guess that’s not so bad because he’s wearing a suit.
Josh Hawley enabled Donald Trump’s coup attempt while clad in a well-fitting suit. He even fled his own Frankstein monsters in the Capitol without even loosening his tie. He’s still scum.
Collins “joked” that she might show up to the Senate in a bikini.
“Obviously, I’m not going to wear a bikini,” she said, “But the fact is, as I understand it, I could!”
First place, Fetterman’s normal attire is not unusual in many places of business these days. Few people go to work in bikinis, even on casual Friday, unless that’s the point of the job. But even if Collins could wear a bikini, she’s made it clear she won’t so what is she worried about?
Republicans must really love filibuster-defending Kyrsten Sinema of the Sinema Party because she frequently defied the informal dress code — unless you think the average accountant shows up at work wearing a ball gown.
Sinema infamously presided over the Senate once wearing a denim blazer like a low rent Aaron Neville impersonator.
Collins also didn’t seem to think Sinema’s purple fright wig and Clan of the Cave Bear dress “debased" the institution.”
When New York Times writer Tressie McMillan Cottom, who’s Black, dared discuss Sinema’s fashion choices, Collins was among those who defended her and suggested any criticism of her attire was “demeaning, sexist and inappropriate.” Cottom spoke with Ashley Mears, a Boston University sociologist and former fashion model, who observed that Sinema’s style was a deliberate class statement. Her “quirky” choices reinforce her position in the social hierarchy, one her fellow senators can accept. Fetterman’s hoodies and shorts offend certain people on the Right and Left because he’s embracing a different social class. Fetterman’s 6-foot-8 so a likely ill-fitting suit would’ve reinforced an expected humility and communicated, “I wear the appropriate costume so I deserve to be here.” But Fetterman rejects paying that price of admission. He’s already won the election and his constituents’ approval is what matters most.
[CBS News]
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And another thing, you know what I think is disrespectful to the institution? Insurrection. Calling for secession. Shit like that. So republican treason-weasels can keep my Senator's name out they fucking trash mouths, thank you very much.
"But Fetterman rejects paying that price of admission. He’s already won the election and his constituents’ approval is what matters most."
I still shudder when I consider what would have happened if John Fetterman had laid down and quit his senate race back in 2020 after his stroke. He could have done that. He could have quit and Dr. Oz would be wearing a suit and tie in the senate today while enabling stroke prone Mitch to fuck everything up even worse than ever.
But John Fetterman did not quit. He arose from his hospital bed. He put on his shorts and his hoodie. He then took one step to the door. Then another step. And another and another. The nurses and his people rushed forward to assist him and he shook their hands away from his shoulders. He refused the wheel chair. His wife told everyone to stand away. She whispered encouragement to him as he kept taking those steps.
He sweat blood that dark day as he let the world know he was still in the race.
He did not quit.
RESPECT then! RESPECT now! RESPECT forever!