822 Comments
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Carthago Delenda Est's avatar

‘Sentient infected pustule’ I’m dead. Well and truly dead. D-E-D.

Donald Trump’s Tent Peg's avatar

If Bannon follows the advice of other "prison consultants", he'll walk up to the biggest, blackest motherfucker in the yard and punch him in the face. The results should be entertaining.

jltympanum's avatar

"The walking crusted ass lesion"

"hooting like a syphilitic gorilla"

"this sentient infected pustule"

And those are his good points.

Altasfolly's avatar

But who’s gonna help him layer all of his jumpsuits!.!?

Rob Roser's avatar

Have you Googled Sam Mangel yet? I think he was the cheerier nazi in Oz.

John Foley's avatar

Who knows, maybe he’ll come out of this experience a changed man.

DDB9000's avatar

I would prefer if he comes out a as a hanged man!

OrdinaryJoe's avatar

At least changed his undershirts.

John Wiederhirn's avatar

Anyone taking bets he dissolves entirely during the delousing?

Sleepmonger's avatar

Prison consultant is an actual job? oO

(oops, didn't scroll down before posting since substack takes me to a new page or often as not somewhere else on the net I didn't ask to go)

Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

I hope Steve's able to learn some useful skill while he's in the slam so he can be a productive member of society when he gets out.

Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

I knew a blacksmith. Moved from Ohio to Arizona. Moving all his work equipment was a task.

Lascauxcaveman's avatar

Two words for Steve: alcohol withdrawal.

Enjoy your time inside, Steve!😁

Altasfolly's avatar

It would be funny if sober Steve was like “what the hell have I been doing these last 9 years? I got trump elected? I didn’t even know someone could blackout that long.”

BlueSpot's avatar

There's always pruno.

Innocent Bystander's avatar

prison consultant, Sam Mangel

That's a JOB ? That's somebody's JOB ? Hey, I bet could do that job: "Ok, Steve, here's what to look out for on the inside. 1) Go for the top bunk but don't, y'know, insist on it. 2) Don't strut the yard. 3) If somebody asks you for something in your hand, don't just hand it over You won't get it back, OK?..."

3FingerPete's avatar

Any bets on Bannon fleeing the country, counting on Trump to rescue him in January?

John Foley's avatar

I wouldn’t put it past him to hide out on another rich guy’s yacht off the coast of Antigua.

Uncle Milburn's avatar

As a former resident of the BOP's residential facilities, let me be the first to welcome Mr. Bannon to the club. May he say something stupid the first day and spend the rest of his time in administrative segregation. (I.e.: 120 days in the hole.)

PaulDietzel's avatar

Carr: "You get two sheets. Every Saturday, you put the clean sheet on the top... the top sheet on the bottom... and the bottom sheet you turn in to the laundry boy. Any man turns in the wrong sheet spends a night in the box. No one'll sit in the bunks with dirty pants on. Any man with dirty pants on sitting on the bunks spends a night in the box. Any man don't bring back his empty pop bottle spends a night in the box. Any man loud talking spends a night in the box. You got questions, you come to me. I'm Carr, the floor walker. I'm responsible for order in here. Any man don't keep order spends a night in...

Luke : ...the box.

Carr : I hope you ain't going to be a hard case.

Luke : [Smiles, shakes head] "

Full text - https://m.imdb.com/title/tt0061512/characters/nm0416378?ref_=tt_cl_c_8

Herr Snackmeier's avatar

The outrageous boasts get tiresome. Bannon is the god-emperor of Talking Big. This will be crushed, that will be destroyed. And it never happens.

A summer at Uncle Sam's sleep-away camp will do us, and perhaps him, a world of good.

Bonnie's avatar

He can drag along some of his faux christian bullshit items and put them on the cell wall

Bonnie's avatar

WALKING CRUSTED ASS LESION OMG nailed it. 🥇🥇🥇🥇