17 Comments

abruptly departed the congressman’s DC office with her backpack when asked about the federal charges against him. Prior to her departure from the office, CNN witnessed three staffers for Santos abruptly depart with their bags.

They can run, but they cannot hide, as Uncle Sam sees them when they’re sleeping even, through the use of spy microwaves

Expand full comment

Pst. Guys. Minor thing, but Kelly Armstrong is a dude.

Expand full comment

Although according to raw story Jenna Ellis ran and hid from the process servers trying to serve her in the case of the framed Georgia election workers. So it can be done.

Expand full comment

Well you must admit he’s been busy.

Expand full comment

Credit card fraud: https://uploads.disquscdn.c...

Expand full comment

I have to wonder how many of his staffers were true believers/Republican operatives, and how many were just duped into working for him and had no idea about any of this stuff.

I don't wonder very hard, mind you, but it does occur to me from time to time.

Expand full comment

”Obviously, it looks bad.“

You know who else thought it looked bad?

Expand full comment

I wonder if Republicans would be as eager to expel him if he wasn’t gay.

Expand full comment

Seems to be a pretty common thing with Repubes

Expand full comment

McCarthy needs every vote he can get, I think Santos and his rock band, The Blackhearts, are safe.

Expand full comment

The reporter at The Hindenburg Disaster?

Expand full comment

However, Santos has been accused of multiple offenses, including campaign finance violations, credit card fraud, stealing puppies from the Amish, and swindling a disabled veteran out of money for puppy surgery. Puppies just aren’t safe around this guy.

This is the only timeline where that entire paragraph isn’t satire fortunately or unfortunately

Expand full comment

I assume there are bags of melted M&Ms, with a tiny hole, littered about the place.

Expand full comment

Man, I’m going to need to more of this stuff. I’m running low.

https://uploads.disquscdn.c...

Expand full comment

So, assuming he's ousted, what happens to the seat? Is there a new election held, or is a new Rep appointed by someone?

Expand full comment