626 Comments
User's avatar
Martini Glambassador's avatar

Heh-heh-heh... 69. But like seriously, that's how old Fatou (hed gif gorilla) is this year. https://martiniambassador.substack.com/p/fatou-celebrates-69

And here is your hed gif: https://open.substack.com/chat/posts/72c5c87d-ac3f-4858-b59f-59ac91d22053

Shallow state's avatar

I bought a three-pack of romaine, forgetting that the spouse would be traveling for three weeks. And now I *am* Fatou.

eddi-SABH's avatar

Happiest birthday to him. He wears that silverback well.

Runfastandwin's avatar

The Gorilla roars

and beats his chest

to let you know

that he’s the best

oblivias's avatar

It's her birthday? Team Taurus!!

Biff52 Lost Canadian's avatar

Nice...

weejee's avatar

69? Still a kid to this geezer.

Antifa Commander's avatar

Lookin’ good at 69, Fatou!

Parakeetist's avatar

Happity Birfdee, Mr. Go-Rilla!

Eat well!

🧁

Menotsure's avatar

Trying to rhyme with sixty nine

Has me walk a real fine line

I don't want to cast aspersions

On Fatou's old age diversions

Glad to see her fat and merry and

Thriving as an ape sextarian

Stanta Knows's avatar

"Merry and"

"sextarian"

Stunning

Stanta Knows's avatar

I wrote a piece of doggerel many years ago rhyming "bartenderina" with "beach sand verbena". I got a groan from the audience.

Nancy Naive's avatar

Still can’t count to 70 without cracking a smile.

Miss Grundy's avatar

Don't mess with Madame Fatou! She can be a crotchety old bint!

PrimerGray's avatar

Misplaced non-comment goes here.

dave in texas's avatar

The only difference between Fatou and me in salad-eating technique is that I'm shoveling it in with a fork. It's the same lettuce-hanging-out-the-mouth thing, though.

good_duck's avatar

I don't want her.

You can have her.

She's Fatou for me.

tehbaddr's avatar

Here's to Fatou!

Sallyfemina's avatar

Everyone who didn't go there thinks Texas Tech isn't a real school, and haven't for many decades. Even other Texans!

Wookiee Monster's avatar

Well, I called it. Pedo47 got his lawyers to file a brief saying the shooting attempt means he gets to have his ballroom.

Wookiee Monster's avatar

Hey, remember when Google’s mission statement was “Don’t be evil?”

Wonder why they dropped that?🤔

"M"'s avatar

This is thrilling about Tori Amos

I am thrilled

And can't wait to hear what she has to say

Sherry's avatar

My question is are they now asking for funds appropriations to build this goddamn monstrosity? It will only hold 1000 people whereas the WCD had 2400 people in a ballroom that hold 2500. Plus he wants to build a full on bunker with functioning hospital. The point of the bunker is to secure the top people until they can be ferried to someplace safer. Not to hunker in when the villagers come at them with torches and pitchforks but that sounds like what they want to do here.

Enter Ranting's avatar

Like someone here said a while back, there are so many logistical problems with the current "design" of the ballroom – car drop-off, security screening, loading docks, refuse removal, lighting trusses rigged to the ceiling – it will never be built.

Virgin Monk Boy's avatar

Patricia Heaton saying “I didn’t call Obama dangerous” is not the flex she thinks it is. Obama wasn’t trying to gut democracy with a steak knife and a merch table. Trump is not being called fascist because liberals skipped breakfast. He is being called fascist because the shoe fits, goose-steps, and keeps filing legal briefs.

Blessed are the people who know the difference between losing an election and watching a wannabe strongman turn the country into a clearance rack dictatorship.

Enter Ranting's avatar

Fuck Patty Heaton, the sanctimonious bitch.

Denise Donaldson's avatar

And ya know, her family is from Cleveland, a blue oasis in a red desert. Her brother was a "culture" columnist at The Plain Dealer. His wit and talent for skewering the pompous status quo were legendary. Needless to say, his views were very far to the left of his sister's. Another family that would have had interesting holiday gatherings.

3FingerPete's avatar

From the DoJ filing: “But, because it is DONALD J. TRUMP, a highly successful real estate developer, who has abilities that others don’t, especially those who assume the Office of President,..."

Or-Aange, sent to Earth as an infant by his parents shortly before his home planet Klepto was destroyed, found and raised by kindly tenement landlord Fred Trump and his wife, possesses powers and abilities far beyond those of mortal men.

eo's avatar

He fights a never-ending battle for graft, malfeasance, and the Putinian Way.

OrdinaryJoe's avatar

Re HEATON. I don’t understand how that vile woman makes a living in the public arena. I have vowed never to view anything she is associated with, at least until she reads her favorite passage from Mein Kampf at the televised funeral for Hair Furor.

Karen Scofield's avatar

Everything is better with Monkeys, Tab's and Coffee in the Morning ☕

Tappin Lisa's avatar

OMG! Thee Rachel Maddow shouted out Dominic on her show last night!

About 10 minutes in...

https://youtu.be/34OkaWRQ7D0?si=WHOyNkuNv2rA4O1w

Not Paranoid, Quadranoid's avatar

Gotta make this comment whenever getting rid of Bibi (PLEEEEASE?!) comes up. Around 82% of Israelis (the poll is from 2025) want to get rid of the Palestinians completely. I don’t know how that breaks down with support of Amalek. But anyone who thinks this genocide is a one-man operation is kidding themselves at best and complicit at worst. It will take a total and drastic change in Zionism to end this atrocity, and I don’t see that happening in Israel OR USA.

Enter Ranting's avatar

Add the settlers, and those that support them, and there are a LOT of assholes in Israel.

Henry30's avatar

Patricia might want to send a similar message to felon-47, who makes some rather unsavory remarks as well. He celebrated Mueller’s death. He responded in remarkably callous fashion to the murders of Rob Reiner and his wife in December. Despite complaining about the left making Nazi comparisons, he in 2017 compared the intelligence community to “Nazi Germany,” and in 2024 called former President Joe Biden’s team a “Gestapo administration.”

Despite complaining about the left calling him a “fascist,” he spent years using that word against his foes. He made light of a hammer attack on Nancy Pelosi’s husband that left him with a fractured skull and other serious injuries. He mused about “Second Amendment people” blocking Hillary Clinton from appointing judges. He reposted video of a supporter saying, “The only good Democrat is a dead Democrat.” He reposted a message from a supporter warning about people rising up to “physically fight” for Trump. He praised a convoy of supporters who dangerously surrounded Biden’s campaign bus in 2020.

He praised Montana’s governor for assaulting a reporter.

He has repeatedly raised hypotheticals in which his supporters rise up in justified violence.

These are just a few things we've heard during his tenure.

Enter Ranting's avatar

We know. They know. It's all projection, all the way down with MAGAts.

HarryButtle, degenerate artist's avatar

I don't know if Patricia Heaton called Obama a fascist, dangerous, or a threat to democracy but the conservative media sure as fuck did. Every goddam day for 8 years.

Rags's avatar

Cue Monty Python-

"There is no cannibalism in the Russian Army. And when I say none, I mean hardly any."