247 Comments
User's avatar
GrannysKnitting's avatar

if there is a zipper in your balls you have a bigger problem to worry about than dumper shits donnie and who is more popular - talk about whiny 'please pick me' energy

Expand full comment
Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

Maybe it's something about being Florida governor. Rick Scott, being one of the undead, is apparently immune to it. Not Jeb! and not Disappointus.

Expand full comment
Charles  Schlotter's avatar

DeSantis lost a friend in the legislature:

https://www.rawstory.com/lone-jewish-republican-member-of-florida-legislature-knocks-desantis-endorses-trump-2666057492/

Of course, jumping ship from DeSantis to Trump because of Ron's antisemitism makes no fucking sense whatsoever.

Expand full comment
Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

I think it's one of those shark or drown conundrums.

Expand full comment
Charles  Schlotter's avatar

Why not both?

Expand full comment
Liminal's avatar

I'd like to see somebody, ANYbody land a few punches on PAB in the primary. Even if it's Cthulu, or, worse, DeSantis. He steamrolled all the repos in 2016 and then came out looking well-supported against Clinton.

Expand full comment
insert_something_creative's avatar

I'd be happy with anyone acknowledging reality. Trump is out of whatever fucking mind he had to begin with. He been saying insane shit in interviews, somehow even more insane than before like how he wasn't indicted and doesn't even know that word. Just once, I'd like a reporter or whoever to look him dead on and say "what the actual fuck are you talking about?"

Expand full comment
Demodocus's avatar

Random fact: The New Hampshire-Canadian border is less than 60 miles long. Which is 60 miles longer than Florida's got. While looking up that detail, I also ran across an AP article that says Gov Sunono is increasing their own border patrols tenfold because of Hamas or whatever.

https://apnews.com/article/new-hampshire-northern-border-security-5b11643a667f1fabce852be5367b0ea1

Expand full comment
Daniel's avatar

“What Donald Trump does now, he is wedded to the teleprompter."

Marshall McLuhan almost certainly did not intend this.

Obviously I know nothing of his work.

Expand full comment
Charles  Schlotter's avatar

Trump never had a fast ball, a slow ball, a slider, a curve ball, or even a spitball, unless you count the time Stormy Daniels spit on his balls.

Expand full comment
Nemo's avatar

Observation: America's wrong wing party and all its MAGA seditionists have quite frankly abandoned civilization. They are itching to create murder and destruction on an industrial scale. To burn it all down as they say. A "sovereign citizen" is a self declared Outlaw, and deserves precisely the treatment afforded him under ancient law. (Look up "outlaw " on Wikipedia). Their dream is a Hobbesian nightmare. I want out.

Expand full comment
MrPug's avatar

Isn't Sununu one of the "nice" and "sane" and "respectable" and "moderate" Republicans? I have that on good authority from the punditocracy, anyway. Sorry, Chris, but if you campaign with DeSantis you are a fucking radical democracy hating anti-LGBTQ bigot fascist dickhole. Period.

Note, that list of horrible things could have gone on quite a bit longer, but I think this audience is well aware of all of the ways Desantis is awful.

Expand full comment
Stephen St John's avatar

Sununu is a fast talking used car salesman.

Expand full comment
OneYieldRegular's avatar

The indignity of impugning the work of Anthony Fauci, one of the world's greatest immunologists and a hero of the fight against both AIDS and COVID - it's fucking disgusting.

Expand full comment
Satanic Pancake's avatar

"Elect me and I will eliminate the entire Federal government. Except the military. Except for the woke parts of the military, like all those generals who say we shouldn't kill all the foreigners and the fucking French. CDC? No CDC! I vow there will never be disease control in this country again!"

Expand full comment
John_atx's avatar

I truly do not understand why DeSantis is running. I know he is limited to two consecutive terms as governor, so will be out of office in January, 2027. You’d think he’d just wait until 2028. I would presume the field would be clear by then (if we still have elections). Nothing Trump would/could do will deter the MAGA cult from voting for him. Perhaps they’re counting on something to intervene. It is baffling.

Expand full comment
Stephen St John's avatar

He's practicing for '28.

Expand full comment
Brando's avatar

It was the best indication that this guy lacks basic political smarts. He should know full well that the party is dominated by Trump--endorse him, wait until 2028 when he won't have to even pretend to govern Florida, and run then. Either way it's an open seat for Republicans.

Instead he's falling flat on his face now, making it less likely anyone will give him a chance in four years.

Expand full comment
kmblue187's avatar

I was so horrified at the first Presidential debate to discuss penis size.

Won't someone think of the children?

Expand full comment
belfryo's avatar

Even NOW I'm shocked that DeSantis is doing as poorly as he is..He's a fucking monster, a bigot and a straight up sociopath. I REALLY thought he would be doing WAYYYY better than he is...What's not to 'like' if you like this sort of creep?

It's weird..I mean I'm GLAD he's doing so poorly, I just don't understand WHY he's doing so poorly...

Expand full comment
OrdinaryJoe's avatar

His oral presentation skills suck. He is verbose, condescending, angry, and has an annoying sing song style of speaking. Even people inclined to his ideas hate listening to him.

Expand full comment
Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

His oral p̵r̵e̵s̵e̵n̵t̵a̵t̵i̵o̵n̵ skills suck. FIFY

Expand full comment
letinstar's avatar

His heels are not high enough...

Expand full comment
Axomamma's avatar

It's not just what DeSantis says, it's how he says it.

He's an aggrieved whiner.

He's incapable of making a positive statement about himself that doesn't rely on an argument that someone else is terrible.

Expand full comment
Stephen St John's avatar

Isn't that the Republican party in a nutshell?

Expand full comment
belfryo's avatar

Sounds like Trump tho

Expand full comment
Nemo's avatar

Also an aggrieved whiner

Expand full comment
Inforia's avatar

This programming update is too little, too late for the ‘Ronbot 2000.’ The campaign for which will soon be a very expensive post-birth abortion.

Expand full comment
Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

This thing was supposed to be lightyears beyond the Romneybot 2000. I mean, it has bluetooth and everything.

Expand full comment
Brando's avatar

DeSantis should drop out and publicly endorse RFK Jr's third party candidacy.

You want to take Trump right the fuck out? Do that and you'll be a legend.

Expand full comment
Linoleum von Curmudgeon, Esq.'s avatar

The Wisconsin and California dairy farm lobbying groups are getting nervous about De Santis. All this Florida cheese he keeps churning out is going to flood the market and tank prices.

Expand full comment
wavicles's avatar

Stinky cheese libelz!

Expand full comment