151 Comments

Where's that Damn Wonkette dating/casual sexxxing site when you need it! Ugh! Let's get this thing up and running, Trix!

Expand full comment

We tried that trade but they insisted we keep Justin Bieber. That was a deal killer.

Expand full comment

Senator Pat Roberts, while he isn't fighting to save Guantanamo, is also leading the fight on behalf of Monsanto and others to PREVENT requiring food companies to reveal whether their products contain GMOs. Jailing people who may (or may not, we have no way of knowing since many were turned in by other Afghans who just wanted to collect a bounty) have been terrorists, and holding them forever without trials, etc. is somehow good for America. But allowing Americans to know what is in the food they feed themselves and their families is not.

Our founding fathers must be rolling over in their graves.

Expand full comment

Haven't the Syrians suffered enough?

Expand full comment

Particularly if you went to Catholic school in the '50s.

Expand full comment

Sam Bee is effin awesome. She would have nothing to do with me.

Expand full comment

I hope he knows he found his calling.

Expand full comment

During World War II over 400,000 Axis prisoners were housed in rural camps throughout America. Eighty prisoners remain in Gitmo. Close Fort Leavenworth and any other military facilities in that rapidly declining state.

It would enlighten the Senator to read this from Wiki:In 1947, Johnnie Phelps, a member of the Women's Army Corps and a lesbian, was told by General Eisenhower, "It's come to my attention that there are lesbians in the WACs, we need to ferret them out...." Phelps replied, "If the General pleases, sir, I'll be happy to do that, but the first name on the list will be mine." Eisenhower's secretary added, "If the General pleases, sir, my name will be first and hers will be second." Phelps then told Eisenhower, "Sir, you're right, there are lesbians in the WACs – and if you want to replace all the file clerks, section commanders, drivers, every woman in the WAC detachment, I will be happy to make that list. But you must know, sir, that they are the most decorated group – there have been no illegal pregnancies, no AWOLs, no charges of misconduct." Eisenhower dropped the idea.

Expand full comment

Tits & Gits

Expand full comment

Many of us in Baja Nebraska have been calling him a dick since some time around the Pleistocene.

Expand full comment

calling Pat Roberts a fucking dick

Assumes facts not in evidence. I highly doubt that Senator Roberts "dick" has been used at all near any lady parts since Jeebus was riding dinosaurs.

Expand full comment

If he does, it won't result in any terrists in Kansas. For quite some time Roberts' claimed legal residence has been a donor's couch in Dodge City. He be Beltwayer full time.

Expand full comment

Not to be confused with ex-Gov. Goodhair's ranch.

Expand full comment

He definitely is good eye candy:-)

Expand full comment

My lovely wife is both. A sinister ginger.

Expand full comment