Here's where we are in America 2014: Scared shitless of a disease that isn't actually harming us, but that is killing thousands in Africa. The best way to make America safe is to bring Ebola under control in Africa, but now that we're determined to ignore people who understand the disease -- or paint them as
State governors: We applaud you generous and heroic decision to go and assist West Africa deal with its terrible Ebola outbreak. All of you brave men and women are the best. Just one thing though: if you go over there, don't even think about ever coming back here.
All the "collective wisdom" from all of the elections brains say that these midterms are always "referendums on the current President," and every single Republican top to bottom is running against Obama, if not all of Government.
It is simple electioneering to wield the mighty fear club especially considering their base consists almost entirely of Amygdala-Americans.
"the predictable dumbshittery that keeps Yr Wonkette in business"
I'd like to think that someday I will no longer need the Wonket to maintain my sanity, but realistically, the growth projections are exponential.
The worst part is that this is all being driven by extreme narcissism. Millions of Americans are so self absorbed that they hear about something scary taking place a half a world away and all they can do is whine "but what about me?" The odds of any American even knowing someone who has met someone who has come into contact with someone who has been exposed to Ebola are astronomical, but these selfish fucks can only think of themselves. No sacrifice is too great for someone else to make, as long as it assuages their irrational fear.
Never mind that the odds are they'll get hit by a car on the way to quarantine someone, or that they'll probably get shot by some yahoo when they head to Kroger to buy that cheap Chinese Hazmat suit. Never mind that the number of dead in Africa who have died from Ebola is dwarfed by the number who die every year from Malaria and TB and a dozen other diseases. Never mind that Americans are far more likely to die from the Flu, or car accidents or shootings or cancer or heart disease or obesity or being stung by a bee (Beebola?) or food poisoning or even being kicked by a horse. Let's all wallow in our daily fear fix and freak out over nothing- enjoy your adrenaline rush, junkies...
Couple our narcissism with massive scientific and mathematical illiteracy and you get the stupidity of the American public. Newsflash, morons- the consequences of any particular event don't change the likelihood of it happening. The odds of something happening are not affected by the potential result if it does. All you idjits who run out to buy a Powerball ticket when the prize is at record levels are doing it wrong. Thanks to all those impulse purchases, your odds actually went down. Buy that ticket when it's only a measly couple million and fewer people are playing (you won't win either way, but your odds do increase slightly). Most of you are at least smart enough not to stay up all night losing sleep over how you will invest your winnings- now be smart enough not to stay up all night worrying yourself sick over something equally unlikely to happen.
The CDC should start saying "The only sure way to protect yourself from Ebola is to remain calm and not to think about it. New studies show that the virus is attracted to people who speak its name, and appears particularly drawn to those in a state of elevated fear."
Maybe some of these flip-shitters would calm the fuck down.
Well, there's the slight issue of moving muscles, working nerves, etc. in a dead body with no blood moving. Also that houseflies don't wipe them all out within a month or two.
Well it's so easy to surrender someone else's rights (see the whole "if you aren't guilty of something, you have nothing to hide" mantra).
As John Oliver said on his podcast, aliens visiting earth would think that the entire planet was populated by assholes, with the notable exception of Doctors Without Borders.
But if Democrats came to Europe you'd lower the average IQ of both the US and EU (Runs and hides cackling like a madman)
Edit. Sorry. I'm so sorry. Just couldn't resist it. (Note to self. Yank have guns. Think before typing)
Compare and contrast <a href="http:\/\/www.cbsnews.com\/news\/flu-season-child-death-toll-doubles-cdc\/" target="_blank">" rel="nofollow noopener" title="http://www.cbsnews.com/news/flu-season-child-deat...">http://www.cbsnews.com/news... and <a href="http://pediatrics.about.com..." target="_blank">" rel="nofollow noopener" title="http://pediatrics.about.com/od/kidsandtheflu/a/de...">http://pediatrics.about.com...
to the 5000 WORLDWIDE deaths this year from Ebola.
State governors: We applaud you generous and heroic decision to go and assist West Africa deal with its terrible Ebola outbreak. All of you brave men and women are the best. Just one thing though: if you go over there, don&#039;t even think about ever coming back here.
There is no question that is what they are doing.
All the &quot;collective wisdom&quot; from all of the elections brains say that these midterms are always &quot;referendums on the current President,&quot; and every single Republican top to bottom is running against Obama, if not all of Government.
It is simple electioneering to wield the mighty fear club especially considering their base consists almost entirely of Amygdala-Americans.
&quot;the predictable dumbshittery that keeps Yr Wonkette in business&quot;
I&#039;d like to think that someday I will no longer need the Wonket to maintain my sanity, but realistically, the growth projections are exponential.
Usually the over-panicked moron that does something stupid and rash ends up dead, right quick.
More proof this isn&#039;t any fucking movie,
The worst part is that this is all being driven by extreme narcissism. Millions of Americans are so self absorbed that they hear about something scary taking place a half a world away and all they can do is whine &quot;but what about me?&quot; The odds of any American even knowing someone who has met someone who has come into contact with someone who has been exposed to Ebola are astronomical, but these selfish fucks can only think of themselves. No sacrifice is too great for someone else to make, as long as it assuages their irrational fear.
Never mind that the odds are they&#039;ll get hit by a car on the way to quarantine someone, or that they&#039;ll probably get shot by some yahoo when they head to Kroger to buy that cheap Chinese Hazmat suit. Never mind that the number of dead in Africa who have died from Ebola is dwarfed by the number who die every year from Malaria and TB and a dozen other diseases. Never mind that Americans are far more likely to die from the Flu, or car accidents or shootings or cancer or heart disease or obesity or being stung by a bee (Beebola?) or food poisoning or even being kicked by a horse. Let&#039;s all wallow in our daily fear fix and freak out over nothing- enjoy your adrenaline rush, junkies...
Couple our narcissism with massive scientific and mathematical illiteracy and you get the stupidity of the American public. Newsflash, morons- the consequences of any particular event don&#039;t change the likelihood of it happening. The odds of something happening are not affected by the potential result if it does. All you idjits who run out to buy a Powerball ticket when the prize is at record levels are doing it wrong. Thanks to all those impulse purchases, your odds actually went down. Buy that ticket when it&#039;s only a measly couple million and fewer people are playing (you won&#039;t win either way, but your odds do increase slightly). Most of you are at least smart enough not to stay up all night losing sleep over how you will invest your winnings- now be smart enough not to stay up all night worrying yourself sick over something equally unlikely to happen.
hmph. I thought it was the 50 year anniversary of the shitstorm of stupid.
The CDC should start saying &quot;The only sure way to protect yourself from Ebola is to remain calm and not to think about it. New studies show that the virus is attracted to people who speak its name, and appears particularly drawn to those in a state of elevated fear.&quot;
Maybe some of these flip-shitters would calm the fuck down.
Well, there&#039;s the slight issue of moving muscles, working nerves, etc. in a dead body with no blood moving. Also that houseflies don&#039;t wipe them all out within a month or two.
Well it&#039;s so easy to surrender someone else&#039;s rights (see the whole &quot;if you aren&#039;t guilty of something, you have nothing to hide&quot; mantra).
As John Oliver said on his podcast, aliens visiting earth would think that the entire planet was populated by assholes, with the notable exception of Doctors Without Borders.
&quot;Outbreak Of Stupid In America Goes Full Gohmert&quot;
FTFY
I still blame Forest Gump.
Pffft. Experts ... like <em>they</em> know stuff!
I do sometimes wish we could restrict voting eligibility to people with I.Q&#039;s larger than their heart rates.