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Fog of Jen's avatar

Not getting paid, but forced to watch a propaganda video.

At least the press is finally getting it, somewhat. Still waffling about the hilarious JOKES! those young conservatives are telling, but baby steps I guess

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Let me sum up's avatar

Am I the only one who remains disturbed by the gym rats wearing 'Team 29' tshirts in the warrrrfighter's crossfit for dummies video?

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Let me sum up's avatar

In the RFK/kegsbreath workout video, the other people in the gym all have Team 29 on the back of their tshirts.

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Dina's avatar

I must be out of the loop, what does it mean? I've gone to the Googlemachine but all it says is something about a Russian rights group of lawyers or something something University of Alabama.

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Virgin Monk Boy's avatar

Imagine being so insecure you make four-star generals sit through your one-man audition tape for Fox & Friends, then force the Pentagon to watch it on repeat like it’s a North Korean boy band video.

Pete Hegseth prancing around yelling “WARFIGHTER!” isn’t strength. It’s a midlife crisis in camo Spanx. The guy turned the Department of Defense into a bad improv class where the only rule is laugh at the boss or lose your job.

When the greatest military on earth has to waste man-hours proving they watched Pete’s PowerPoint of Shame, that’s not defense. That’s performance art for fragile egos.

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Zyxomma's avatar

Ta, Evan. Sometimes it feels like the entire purpose of the entire maladministration is to give aid and comfort to the USA's enemies.

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Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

Are Pentagon personnel allowed to wear little flags and crosses? If so, might I suggest skateboard lapel pins?

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chev_chelios's avatar

If someone replaced Sec. DingDong's pea sized brain with that if a bird....this stupid MF'er would fly backwards....I'm a Marine Corp. Vet "70-"74...and this fu*ker is a total embarrassment and disgrace to that uniform he wore, to his fellow service members and this country !

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fair_n_hite_451's avatar

He somehow manages to personify "stolen valour" even though he actually served. Albeit as a PR guy.

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Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

His brain on a razor blade would look like a BB rolling down a four-lane highway.

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Andrew L. Erdman's avatar

I get the feeling that reading the transcript would somehow be even more hilarious and bizarre. Like something from a Kurt Vonnegut novel or something???

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Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

Joseph Heller is spinning in his grave that he didn't have the opportunity to put Pete in Catch-22. He'd outshine every officer in the book.

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Khavrinen's avatar

"everybody in the Pentagon has to watch his dork speech, or read it, and they are not allowed to say bad things about it or make fun of it, OR ELSE."

Seems to me like threatening everybody with dire consequences if they make fun of your speech is kind of an indication that you already know it's bad enough that people are likely to be making fun of it....

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Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

Isn't there a tradition in the military of thinking the people above you in the chain of command are dicks?

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fair_n_hite_451's avatar

military, business, education, .... that attitude is everywhere. For good reason too.

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Stephen St John's avatar

Mollie Hemingway - I had the misfortune to start reading one of her articles on the "Russia hoax." Didn't get through much of it before I said "I'm done with this sh*t."

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Left Coast Tom's avatar

Regarding: "And C., Secretary Shitfaced is DRUUUUUNK. On power!"

Wild Turkey, also, too.

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Bitter Scribe's avatar

According to one estimate, Hegseth spends at least half his time fretting about leaks and trying to stop them.

The guy knows that everyone he works with thinks he doesn't belong there and should go back to whatever the fuck he did on TV. It just burns his hair gel.

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forestvillain's avatar

Dear Secretary of Cosmetics,

Before your next address to the gathered top brass of your armed forces, perhaps you might consider consulting a speech pathologist to help disguise the lisp. Further, wrist splints could possibly hide that not-so-manly limpness that betrays your feigned masculinity. And finally, standing still is an available option to hide the swishing hips when you sashay across the stage.

We trust these suggestions will assist in your continuing cosplay.

Sincerely,

Log Cabin Republicans

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JunkYardDogg's avatar

Frag Me Daddy Greaseball Hegseth announced that on Saturday, as a counter to, &/or to intimidate the Hate American Fascism No Kings Insurrection protests against Mein Trumpf, the Marines at Camp Pendleton will be holding a celebratory assault/landing exhibition on the Camp’s Oceanside beach training area. Best Boom, Boom ejaculatory part is that it will feature live fire from off shore Naval vessels. Live fire to be missiles and perhaps ship based artillery , fired on shore, theoretically over the highly travelled I5 Highway. What could possibly go wrong. Present will be Hegseth and former Marine Rambo VD Vance.

Nothing like sending a message to all those Antifa Commies on Saturday. Somebody best tell these fucks that ALL the U.S. military troops sent to Europe in WW2 were all Antifa.

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irish379's avatar

live fire over a populated area

jesus, can you be any dumber

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JunkYardDogg's avatar

It is basically open land in that area. It is just that the major highway goes past it. Which makes it ludicrous for live fire.

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irish379's avatar

watch for short rounds

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Bitter Scribe's avatar

China does offshore military exercises to intimidate Taiwan.

The U.S. does offshore military exercises to intimidate California.

Why, I feel safer already.

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JunkYardDogg's avatar

Trump has declared war on America.

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Underdawg23's avatar

Save your confederate money, honey!

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Zap's avatar

So when the White House press corpse turns in their badges will the story still come to them?

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Enter Ranting's avatar

I'm sure everyone's arms at the Pentagon are sore from all the wanking motions.

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Suki Herr's avatar

I didn’t know who Pete Hegseth was until he was shockingly chosen by Trump for Sec of Defense. From the first moment I saw him I thought of Niedermeyer in “Animal House”.

Embarrassingly I have seen Animal House more than a woman should admit, so yes I do know the entire arc of Niedermeyer’s story.

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fair_n_hite_451's avatar

Would that Kegbreath meets a similar end.

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