474 Comments
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ElderlyLoudCatWomyn's avatar

I can relate to the Batfish. On more than one occasion I've been called an old bat.

muggle's avatar

Do you know why I walk around on the bottom of the ocean?

Because I'm Batfish!!!

Linoleum von Curmudgeon, Esq.'s avatar

In 100 years the bunker doors of the billionaire overlords will open and the inbred mutant progeny of the Theil, Andressen, Musk clans will emerge, eager and ready to lay claim to their brave new world. A world swept clean of pesky working class moochers. A world without interfering governments telling them what to do. A world of unfettered innovation and more inbreeding amongst inbred cousins and siblings.

Just one fly in the ointment the techbreeders hadn't counted on: giant mutated red-lipped bat fish almost six stories tall who had emerged from the oceans 85 years earlier than the oligarchs. And not just any old giant mutated red-lipped batfish either. No these future lords of the entire world shoot laser beams from those eyes and speak all dialects of Chinese fluently.

Miss Grundy's avatar

Fishy has a weird mouth and feetsies....

Snarfyguy's avatar

Wait, a fish with feet?

OneYieldRegular's avatar

Presenting the ocean's only monotreme: The Frog-Billed Fishypus

WeaverSix's avatar

Why does the fish-thing have eyes on its butt?

WHY DOES THE FISH-THING HAVE EYES ON ITS BUTT?

ElderlyLoudCatWomyn's avatar

Unique in the annals of the fish kingdom.

Craig Nixon's avatar

It also has an anal fin. Heh.

Martini Glambassador's avatar

Those gills are kind of interesting, actually. There are some species of fish that propel themselves by gulping in water and expelling it through their rear-facing gills, and the RLBF’s gills are in the right spot to do that. But, nobody has ever observed one moving that way. Maybe they do and it hasn’t yet been seen, or maybe it’s a leftover trait from when they once did before evolving their current walking preference. Or maybe there’s another reason they are there yet to be discovered.

tehbaddr's avatar

Holy evolutionary abomination WTF is it?!

Sojourner Truth's avatar

Stephen Miller's mama.

Nancy Naive's avatar

Batman. Holy evolutionary abomination Batman.

Meccalopolis's avatar

Almost as bizarre as a sea robin.

tehbaddr's avatar
2hEdited

Reminds me of a bikini whale.

Rocket Cat and Last Free Folk's avatar

I saw a woodpecker on the ground acting like a robin yesterday and was confused. I hope their bugs are okay…Feb was the hottest on record

Menotsure's avatar

A walking fish with red lips and a beard

Now you're just making stuff up.

It's not like things are not already weird

I need me a hot steaming cup.

Old Man Yells at Cloud's avatar

"A walking fish with red lips and a beard"

What is one too many face lifts at Mer-a-lago, Alex?

Bagels of Doom's avatar

Du du du du du du du du du du du du du du du du BATFISH!

The Wanderer's avatar

And his sidekick, Sea Robin?

Bagels of Doom's avatar

Holy siphonophore, Batfish!

Craig Nixon's avatar

Upfisted for actually having the correct amount of dus.

Richard S's avatar

Neal Hefti approves.

Craig Nixon's avatar

When I was a little kid there was pracically nothing that wasn't scored by Hefti or Lalo Schifrin.

Bagels of Doom's avatar

LOL. It's two sets of eight.

TootsStansbury 🇺🇦's avatar

Not much is known about them because they aren’t real, I mean, come on. /s

Craig Nixon's avatar

Next thing you know, ppl gonna be saying there's more than one time zone. Huh.

A Tad Impatient To 86 47's avatar

‘Heh. You other fishies think yer so pretty and sleek. Well I can do *this*! Learn s’more skills!’

R miller's avatar

I DID apparently want to read the 157 page summary judgment and it was HI-larius! That judge reading all that crap and finding basically nothing original in any of the novels or drafts from either party. Nothing original in any romantasy: DISMISSED!

tim gueguen's avatar

What will Bezos do when the AI tells him the solution to climate change is "Turn all of us off?"

ElderlyLoudCatWomyn's avatar

The 'caught on camera' moment stealing money was awesome. But the court scene was just incredible. Afroman was being so very underestimated on the stand.

𝙈𝙚𝙜𝙧𝙞𝙢 𝙏𝙬𝙞𝙨𝙩's avatar

Ah, the lemon pound cake in Afroman’s video gave me LIFE on this day!

M-X's avatar
1hEdited

I. may wish it was different, and no it's no justification for the abuse of scumbag racist authority Afroman was subjected to, but we can also look at the whole picture before lifting the man up as an unalloyed hero of the people. From last night:

UncleTravelingMatt

10h

Edited

I was home sick again today, so I took some time off and watched a good chunk of the Afroman trial. The jury probably reached the right result, but Mr. Foreman is a complete fucking asshole.

I have no problem with calling the cops thieves. They brought that shit on themselves. Before you decide to latch on to Afroman as the good guy, though, sit down and watch some of the videos and read some of his social media posts about the woman cop. It ain't easy to watch. Asshole has spent nearly 3 years attacking a woman with a deeper than normal voice and undainty features by suggesting she has a dick or saying she is a lesbian. Real fucking funny stuff.

Not the least bit surprising, though. His last big "hit" was a song about Hunter Biden smoking crack that was beloved by right-wing media. He bragged about possibly singing it at Trump rallies, because, of course he's a shitbag Trump supporter.

Liked (4)

cmd Human Scum's avatar

Hegseth added that Iran’s ability to manufacture new ballistic missiles has “probably taken the hardest hit” and was “down 90% since the start of the conflict”.

“UAVs [unmanned aerial vehicle], think kamikaze drones, down 90%,” he said.

Hegseth ended his prepared speech with an overtly religious plea for Americans to pray for US troops “on bended knee with your family, in your schools, in your churches, in the name of Jesus Christ”. https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/live/2026/mar/19/donald-trump-iran-bondi-epstein-mullin-japan-takaichi-save-voter-id-latest-news-updates

JR's avatar

Holy batfish, Batman! Its pectoral and ventral fins are like feet. And the gill tailpipes. And the lipstick. And the little built-in fishing lure in front of its mouth. Evolution or Intelligent Design?

Mavenmaven's avatar

The story of this Kai Schwemmer, the new Nazi friendly head of college Republicans needs to be more widely circulated, particularly his racist attacks on Reza Pahlavi, who is a major force in the uprising against the Ayatollahs in Iran, so good on the Trumpists again attacking potential allies.

https://popular.info/p/the-new-bigoted-leader-of-the-college

Pope Scipio Newburyporticus's avatar

"who is a major force in the uprising against the Ayatollahs"

No he isn't. At all. Whatsoever.

Mavenmaven's avatar

I've been to many of the Persian demonstrations here, am connected to the Iranian communities in NY and LA and they all carry his banners, post his image repeatedly, at all the demonstrations across the USA (I have lots of photos), so please explain how he "isn't".

Pope Scipio Newburyporticus's avatar

"in NY and LA"

He is not a factor in Iran. At all.

Mr blob's avatar

Clicked on just to see what we were dealing with. Looks exactly like what “draw a Nazi from memory using only crayon” would look like

John_atx's avatar

Looks like a couple fields in Abu Dhabi had to shut down. Habshan, lots of H2S gas, major source of sulfur for industrial processes. Bab, pretty big field. Facility upgrades were underway. Oh well. You got to wonder if Zakum, the big offshore field is going to get hit.

Craig Nixon's avatar

𝐓𝐫𝐮𝐦𝐩’𝐬 𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐨𝐧 𝐚 𝐠𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐢𝐧? 𝐇𝐢𝐬 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝-𝐩𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐩𝐚𝐧𝐞𝐥 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐝𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐝𝐞.

𝑇ℎ𝑒 𝑝𝑟𝑜𝑝𝑜𝑠𝑎𝑙 ℎ𝑎𝑠 𝑎𝑙𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑦 𝑏𝑒𝑒𝑛 𝑟𝑒𝑗𝑒𝑐𝑡𝑒𝑑 𝑏𝑦 𝑚𝑒𝑚𝑏𝑒𝑟𝑠 𝑜𝑓 𝑎 𝑠𝑒𝑝𝑎𝑟𝑎𝑡𝑒 𝑓𝑒𝑑𝑒𝑟𝑎𝑙 𝑐𝑜𝑖𝑛 𝑐𝑜𝑚𝑚𝑖𝑡𝑡𝑒𝑒 — 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑝𝑎𝑛𝑛𝑒𝑑 𝑏𝑦 𝑓𝑜𝑟𝑚𝑒𝑟 𝑚𝑒𝑚𝑏𝑒𝑟 𝐾𝑎𝑟𝑒𝑒𝑚 𝐴𝑏𝑑𝑢𝑙-𝐽𝑎𝑏𝑏𝑎𝑟.

A federal arts commission will weigh whether to approve a commemorative gold coin featuring Donald Trump on Thursday, the administration’s latest effort to celebrate the president, even as Democrats and members of another federal committee say the idea is deeply inappropriate and potentially illegal.

The proposal calls for a 24-karat gold coin depicting Trump leaning on a desk with clenched fists, based on a photograph taken by his chief White House photographer and now displayed in the Smithsonian’s National Portrait Gallery. Such gold coins from the U.S. Mint typically sell for several thousand dollars.

The Commission of Fine Arts — composed entirely of Trump appointees, including a 26-year-old executive assistant whose only listed credential for the post was managing Trump’s portrait — has so far signaled support for the administration’s projects, including unanimously approving Trump’s White House ballroom last month.

But new coin designs are supposed to receive approval from two panels — and that second panel, the bipartisan Citizens Coinage Advisory Committee, refused last month to consider the proposed gold coin. In interviews, members opposed putting a sitting president on currency, saying it would break with democratic norms and reek of subservience to royalty.

https://wapo.st/4by5sE9

Antifa Commander's avatar

Announce that they will not be accepted as U.S. currency, start a movement to reject them (“No, you can’t pay with that shit. Get the fuck out of my store.”), and ban them as legal currency as soon as possible.

NO TRUMP MEMORIALS *ANYWHERE*

C&A Bongo Man's avatar

More proof he wants to be a sovereign.

Laurian's avatar
1hEdited

"Hey what if we sent all the minesweepers away from the place we chose to have a war filled with mines? Goddamn, Pete Hegseth is good at his job."

Say what you will about Russian kleptocracy, at least they would have defenestrated whisky Pete by now.

Pliny the Younger's avatar

Afroman is my spirit animal this fine Thursday morning. And those officers' "you hurt my feelings" argument has all the legal weight of the rice paper it's written on. And as the old saying goes, "a hit bully will holler".

Sojourner Truth's avatar

Dammit.

Now I has a hankering for lemon pound cake.

Sojourner Truth's avatar

This is the snowflake who lost his shit (the little bit of shit he had left) over a James Comey photo of seashells:

------

U.S. joins in attack on natural gas field. Trump floats idea of eviscerating country.

Tecolote's avatar

Rising oil prices have also triggered an increase in the price of natural gas. Bombing that gas field is just more spittin' in the wind behavior.