Raccoons Begin To Cleanse Suburbs of Humans
Raccoons -- "Nature's Night Bear" -- have long lived in proximity to humans and the garbage cans that are the primary symbol of human habitation. But the masked beasts have suddenly decided tokill everyoneinstead of just eating pizza crusts and tipping over Weber grills. This is happening now in Sacramento, and will soon be happening everywhere humans hide.
TheSacramento Bee reports on this new 9/11:
Another raccoon attack in urban Sacramento on Tuesday night has seriously injured a dog and startled a neighborhood. The third attack in two weeks, it suggests a fundamental change in the city's relationship with its wild inhabitants.
The raccoon incidents come amid numerous skunk encounters in the city that have left dogs and people desperate for a bath.
Abath? Have these skunks no shame?! [ Sacto Bee ]