Racists Reeeeeally Mad Hillary Clinton Keeps Lying That Racism Exists

Last night, in the vice presidential debate, Hillary Clinton's running mate, Tim Kaine, started talking about race and civil rights in his very first paragraph (well, after saying hi). Here's how he (non-) answered his first question, on presidential leadership:

This is a very special place. Sixty-five years ago, a young, courageous woman, Barbara Johns, led a walkout of her high school, Moton High School. She made history by protesting school segregation. She believed our nation was stronger together. And that walkout led to the Brown v. Board of Education decision that moved us down the path toward equality.

Tim Kaine takes civil rights seriously; it's a bit of a defining issue for the lefty Catholic Jesuit boy and (ahem) civil rights lawyer. (Fun fact! Even before   Donald Trump was refusing to rent to blacks, Hillary Clinton was going undercover to investigate segregation in the schools!)

The entire time Kaine was speaking, his opponent, Mike Pence, was struggling not to roll his eyes out loud. (Pence would soon give up and give over to sneering entirely.)

All week, Hillary Clinton and Tim Kaine have been talking about civil rights, about how white people need to feel empathy for black people, especially the fear black mothers feel. And all week, the Republican establishment has reacted in OUTRAGE to their suggestion that racism might still exist. 

Here's Hillary Clinton in Haverford, PA:

White people need to empathize and understand what it’s like for black parents to worry about their kids' safety. https: //t.co/Qw8r6Aa6C7 

— Hillary Clinton (@HillaryClinton) October 4, 2016 

And here's Clinton this past weekend, at Charlotte's Little Rock AME Zion Church, discussing being a grandparent and knowing she will never have to fear the way black grandmothers do.

(Do watch through for Zianna Oliphant , the little girl from last week's Charlotte meeting, here beaming instead of weeping. It'll make you feel ever so much better!)

Clinton is talking about the criminal justice system, and how every -- like, every -- study shows black people getting longer sentences than whites for the same crimes ... and dark black people just getting super -fucked.

She talks about implicit bias, and how we're all a little bit racist, and the aim is to realize when we're doing it, and try to stop it.

It's about the most non-judgmental look at racism you could possibly espouse.

And at the same time, she offers compassion for cops, who are scared too (OH NO SHE CALLED COPS PUSSIES, IMPEACH!); she tells a long story (in the first video above) about a black dude who started a program for the black community and cops to get to know one another, and when he did a simulated ride-along training with those same cops, he pretty immediately shot a simulated teenage girl. It can be really dangerous out there! For everyone!

And yet the right is fucking pissed. 

Say, are they pissed?

Here's a smattering:

• National Review:  "Hillary's Talk of Implicit Bias Should Scare Every American" 

• Gateway Pundit:  "Good lord!" (That was literally all he could say, because he is lazy in addition to being stupid.)

• Mike Pence: “Enough of this seeking every opportunity to demean law enforcement probably by making accusation of implicit bias every time tragedy occurs.”

• Is it true black people can't have unconscious racist attitudes or 'implicit bias' against other black people, or is Mike Pence full of shit?

  In fact, it isn't! And he is! We all swim in the same stew of visuals and stereotypes. But the Right is insisting that Hillary Clinton is calling them neo-Nazis instead of pointing out that we're all susceptible to it! And when one of them does notice she said "we"? He takes it as a hilarious gotcha, because he is A Idiot. That was her fucking point, dumbass, no "closer parsing" required.

  What is implicit bias, and do I have it?

  It's our unconscious attitudes about different races, and yes, you probably do! Even if you are a liberal (though probably less!) and even if you are a black person yourself. Does it make you a bad person? No! The key is to understand when you're thinking something that is a little bit racist and say to yourself "hmmm, that was kind of racist, I will try not to think that." Cognitive behavorial therapy FTW!

  What about that basket of deplorables, huh? Hillary Clinton is saying all Trumpers are Nazis.

  If you send people on Twitter pictures of the gas chambers in which you hope they will die, yeah, you're pretty fucking gross. So probably don't do that, or call Michelle Obama a gorilla when you teach at an elementary school. If you agree both of those things are awful and you still like Donald Trump for some reason that doesn't involve being scared of your fellow Americans, then you're not deplorable, you're just a regular person trying to do the best you can and maybe can try a little bit harder. Get the difference? No? Then that's on you.

  Is there an In Conclusion?

  Yes, thank you for asking!

  Hillary Clinton and Tim Kaine are really working to help close the racial divide that Barack Obama invented. (KIDDING, NEW READERS!) And they're being torn up by people who want it to be okay to complain that black people are THE WORST MOST TERRIBLE PEOPLE in the WHOLE WIDE WORLD (hi National Review Online). 

  And those people can fuck right off, because they're not fooling anybody besides maybe themselves.