177 Comments

Even Clarence Odbody wouldn't jump in the river for that dick.

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WTF? Why did they come looking for him? It says he was taken from his home.

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So many contenders, you can only get them all in if you do one a day.

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Aaaaand shared to his Twitter post.

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Big heart? A tyrannosaur has a literally big heart, but you don't see me running up to give one a hug.

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Valedictorians are some of "the good ones". Salutatorians on the other hand, I never trust them.

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With convictions.

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Turns out, "Children of the Corn" isn't a viable long term strategy.

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Ordinarily, I'd say Border Patrol was a pretty thankless job, but a) They seem to be chock full of assholesb) They do get thanked, by other assholes

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I am feeling a lot better! Thanks for asking!

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That too.

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No, it was 1.6 feet - half a meter. That's plenty long enough, though.

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Can we deport the Border Patrol for activities un-American?

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Madness?Says Team Trum-pee "Here, hold my beer"

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Also their official atheism, don't forget.

The sick irony is that the Soviet bloc's lip service to socialism was enough to keep the Western ruling class providing a welfare state and otherwise making capitalism work for the working masses. With Stalinism gone, there isn't even anything that pretends to be an alternative. Without the dream of an alternative, it's very, very hard to resist what is.

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