123 Comments
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Hairstrike Alpha's avatar

Isn't secrets and lies the basis for Southern Gothic? Or is that another literary type? I just assume every super devout wingnut Southern family (I don't need to offer "white" in there, do I?) is it's own mini House of Usher and these poll gaps just demonstrate the extraordinary lengths these turds will go to accomplish the effect of "nothing to see here, move along now...."

proudgrampa the younger's avatar

Yo, I know all about the "heroine" abuse: that's why they're using the anti-depressants! ;-)

L. Ron Pony  ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฆ's avatar

Or finding their partners IN Internet porn.

Smibo's avatar

In all fairness, the Republicans who are reporting their off-the-charts happiness are really just paraphrasing an old axiom: Ignorance is bliss.

Lark_in_the_AM's avatar

How can anyone who is as full of hate as these folks are consider themselves "happy"?

bobbert's avatar

YOU CANNOT PETITION THE LORD WITH PRAYER!!!

Whale Chowder's avatar

I heard "Porsche" but really, all those stripper names are interchangeable.

Wait, what?

Doloras Funkette's avatar

Because hating people feels good, in the same way as speeding on meth does, duh.

azeyote's avatar

happiness is highly overrated -

Wookie Monster's avatar

You could probably cut the number of republicans who are happy in their marriages in half by taking into account all the cases where the husbands answered the survey both for themselves and their wives.

Wookie Monster's avatar

Look, just because Marcus locks himself in his study and cries softly while listening to his Streisand collection every night doesn't mean he isn't happy in his marriage.

Rick Hill's avatar

We do a lot of work for rich folks, a lot of them republican. the men always want their own little space where they have everything they need and don't need to see their family anymore than they need to. Or, to put it in a recent conversation with a prospective client:She- "What a beautiful day. (May, weather just now turning nice)Me-"Yeah, it is."She(looks at husband sleeping on couch at 5:30 pm)-Soon he can go fishing and I won't have to see him all day.Me-Ohhhkay.

MAZS's avatar

Since the South has the highest divorce rates in the Country, doesn't that kinda belie the conclusion of the study. They subjectively have the best marriages, but those pesky facts don't seem to back it up.

sillyclucker's avatar

Did they talk to any Republican women? Or just the men?

louwhitaker's avatar

Granted, this is completely anecdotal. But in my family, limited to siblings and first cousins, there are two Republicans and many Democrats. By far the most unhappy of us, both in life and in love, are the two Republicans. My wife's family exhibits the same phenomenon. Certainly, I know some contented Republicans and some liberal Democrats whose lives are a mess. But in my experience, that is definitely not the way to bet.

Rick Gardner's avatar

folks here in Utah are among the biggest fans of anti-depressants and porn .