Yosemite Rick Perry, the rootinest, tootinest governor in all the land, was in NEW YORK CITY today to spend a few minutes making merry with the Zoo Crew on "Morning Joe." The biggest surprise of the entire interview was that Joe Scarborough managed to resist flinging himself across the table to plant a sloppy, wet kiss on Yosemite Rick.
Does Rick Perry really think the Secret Service is going to let him pack heat?
If so, he's got a rude awakening in store since while the Secret Service does protect the President, they are under no obligation to do anything the President wants if it jeopardizes their safety. The last time a protective detail deferred to the President's decision on safety, it was on a sunny November day in Dallas, Texas.
<b>Jeb Bush:</b> My security detail will cut taxes, increase military spending, invade several countries, drill everywhere AND balance the budget. Now watch this drive!
That&#039;s because you needed to fire 8 bullets before you even wounded that coyote that wasn&#039;t causing you any problem while I was paying for that $10,000/month rental mansion in Westlake after the Gov&#039;s Mansion burned. Ya remember that you goat fucking Aggie?
I do, and you sure loved sucking on that Texas tax dollar titty for 30 month while the Governor&#039;s Mansion was being rebuilt. I suppose you also forgot the project was scheduled to take 12 months but because of all of Anita&#039;s change orders, it required the Legislature to further appropriate $4 million for knick-nacks and carpet.
Please run for President and when you loose, let me know which day your leaving Austin so I can wave good bye when you return to Niggerhead.
<b>John McCain:</b> My security detail will bomb everyone, and everything, everywhere, forever. That&#039;s the only way to ensure peace. Questions?
Back off! That job belongs to Cindy McCain.
Can you imagine a wet fish-eagle-shirt contest? MY EYES!
Nearly-Headless Nick Libel!
Mitt Romney: Why, I have entire binders full of women who you can knock <strike>up</strike> down.
Does Rick Perry really think the Secret Service is going to let him pack heat?
If so, he&#039;s got a rude awakening in store since while the Secret Service does protect the President, they are under no obligation to do anything the President wants if it jeopardizes their safety. The last time a protective detail deferred to the President&#039;s decision on safety, it was on a sunny November day in Dallas, Texas.
Play to your base! Say, &quot;What happens to people who run through my Governor&#039;s Mansion would make Putin faint.&#039;
Don&rsquo;t fuck with Rick Perry.
He&rsquo;ll kill you.
Dead.
Like that.
<b>Jeb Bush:</b> My security detail will cut taxes, increase military spending, invade several countries, drill everywhere AND balance the budget. Now watch this drive!
That&#039;s because you needed to fire 8 bullets before you even wounded that coyote that wasn&#039;t causing you any problem while I was paying for that $10,000/month rental mansion in Westlake after the Gov&#039;s Mansion burned. Ya remember that you goat fucking Aggie?
I do, and you sure loved sucking on that Texas tax dollar titty for 30 month while the Governor&#039;s Mansion was being rebuilt. I suppose you also forgot the project was scheduled to take 12 months but because of all of Anita&#039;s change orders, it required the Legislature to further appropriate $4 million for knick-nacks and carpet.
Please run for President and when you loose, let me know which day your leaving Austin so I can wave good bye when you return to Niggerhead.
<b>John McCain:</b> My security detail will bomb everyone, and everything, everywhere, forever. That&#039;s the only way to ensure peace. Questions?
Wow... it&#039;s almost as if you don&#039;t like the guy.
You mean he remembered the third way?