Donald Trump is officially the Republican nominee for president, it's true, I just saw it on the teevee! You guys, this is so exciting! Oh no, liveblog over, I just died! Last night -- and don't know about you, but I'm still not over it -- we watched as mothers gnashed and wailed and blamed Barack O'Clinton for every premature death in this land or others. Tonight will be much easier; we will just witness them blaming Hillary Rodham Obama for every time their meth-head son got fired from his McJob.