Did you know Mitt Romney once saved a 14-year-old girl's LIFE? He did that by going to look for her after she disappeared. Even though he did not actually find her. And she was just sleeping off an Ecstasy binge. But no, Mitt Romney is like Ryan Gosling times Morrissey plus Superman minus Kryptonite. Mitt Romney can't help saving people's lives. He just does it. Like one time he and his family saw a boat take on water and they didn't even leave the people to drown! MittRomney.com, through the offices of
Oh, awesome! Someone needs to tell Mitt about this, stat. He may be proscribed from <i>drinking</i> wine after is upcoming big loss, but Joseph Smith didn&#039;t say a damn word about <i>butt-chugging!</i>
I read &quot;and rode out to assist the six people, along with the family dog, struggling in the water&quot; and somehow envisioned Mitt&#039;s family dog riding its own jetski. But apparently that was not what happened.
Presumably this is because the Romneys were not the first to arrive to offer help, and the other four potential drownees (and dog) had already been picked up by the earlier rescuers.
I mean, the guy&#039;s enough of a douche that you can give him the benefit of the doubt and <em>still</em> hate him.
Mitt Romney once saw a quarter lying on the sidewalk and was going to pick it up, when he decided to leave it there so a poor person could have it instead. True story.
Well, ok, he didn&#039;t exactly leave it there. Actually, he superglued it to the sidewalk, so the poor person would have to work for his money and so build character.
And he then hid behind a tree, to see how many poor people he would build character in. (Five, before he got bored and left.)
Yeah, as I read it the scoreboard says:
Rmoneys 2
Others 4 (plus dog)
I&#039;m not even a boat guy, and that made my eyes pop.
Mitt actually helped me make oatmeal today!
I saved Mitt Romney&#039;s life this morning. I killed a shit-eating coyote.
John Kerry saved that marine&#039;s life in Vietnam and all the Republicans did was call him a fake war hero.
Oh, awesome! Someone needs to tell Mitt about this, stat. He may be proscribed from <i>drinking</i> wine after is upcoming big loss, but Joseph Smith didn&#039;t say a damn word about <i>butt-chugging!</i>
Great, Editrix. Now I&#039;m going to get an inexplicable boner everytime someone mentions Mitt Romney, because of this.
He&#39;ll make Rick Perry look like Michael Kinsley.
Oh yeah? What about all the people he didn&#039;t save?
I thought I was a hero for eating the last of the Dove chocolates but you have put my sacrifice to shame.
I read &quot;and rode out to assist the six people, along with the family dog, struggling in the water&quot; and somehow envisioned Mitt&#039;s family dog riding its own jetski. But apparently that was not what happened.
I would tell you all about my many good deeds, but I don&#039;t won&#039;t you thinking I&#039;m a slut.
And to show he&#039;s really hip and with it, Romney says induct Andy WIlliams into Rock &#039;n Roll Hall of Fame.
Presumably this is because the Romneys were not the first to arrive to offer help, and the other four potential drownees (and dog) had already been picked up by the earlier rescuers.
I mean, the guy&#039;s enough of a douche that you can give him the benefit of the doubt and <em>still</em> hate him.
Every time I see it.
Mitt Romney once saw a quarter lying on the sidewalk and was going to pick it up, when he decided to leave it there so a poor person could have it instead. True story.
Well, ok, he didn&#039;t exactly leave it there. Actually, he superglued it to the sidewalk, so the poor person would have to work for his money and so build character.
And he then hid behind a tree, to see how many poor people he would build character in. (Five, before he got bored and left.)