He thinks he'll get money from Trump? Ask his contractors who were stiffed.
I have an idea for Rudy on how he can raise funds...dress down a little, grab a filthy rag and some Clorox and be a squeegee man on the exit from the Lincoln Tunnel! When he was Mayor of New York, he waged war on them to drive them away from that road entrance to New York!
Explaining to Donald that something "isn't a smart idea" won't work. Donald specializes in doing things that aren't smart ideas. If Rudy is going to Trump for money, he's going to keep leaving disappointed. He may have to sing like a whole chorus of songbirds to stay out of the pokey. When I read accounts of how he allegedly wrecked the lives of innocent election workers, I just can't work up any sympathy for this guy. If he's willing to do that kind of thing just to cling to the slenderest thread of proximity to power, what can anyone really say in his favor?
Rudy lost his mind years ago, maybe when his denture uppers glue started leaking into his brain. Dude spends millions on like a dozen country club memberships from dark dollars he receives from shady foreign figures looking to buy access to American politicians. He sold his fairly strong reputation to the MAGA movement and we know how well that ends. Now he’s a joke, with no credibility, disbarred in DC and NY, and a creepy sex perv manipulating troubled women. He fucked around with The Big Lie because he thought it was his ticket to sustaining his lifestyle and status in Trumpland. Now the bill has come due. Had he retired 10 years ago, sold his homes and downsized to a single retirement home and golf membership, he’d have been fine. He could have lived well on speaking and consulting fees. Who wants to pay this clown now?
The thing is, Rudy has ALWAYS been shady, as has PAB. All we needed to know was constantly revealed in SPY mag in the 80s, which I admit was kind of hard to read. The 9/11 stuff? One of the larger mishandled projects was siting the FDNY comms center adjacent to the Twin Towers, when it was supposed to be sited in Brooklyn (or wherever else, if memory serves.) Both Roodles and Fat Boy Orange are responsible for the deaths of many citizens. Sorry, rant over :///
It bothers me that every time we talk about Rhodes, we gotta do this "how far he's fallen" schtick, like his pre-drumpf record wasn't fraudulent bullshit. Like "broken windows" policing worked. During a tiny, traumatic window in time, when ppl all over the world were inclined to give even sub-mediocre authority figures the benefit of the doubt, he wasn't the COMPLETE shitbag he so clearly wanted to be.
If his bullshit has the staying power of Reagan worship, it'll be another decade at least before ppl start saying "actually, he was a pretty shit us attorney a worse mayor ."
People who throw themselves in front of any and all cameras tend to get this treatment. Vain, ambitious gasbags. All they have to do is declare themselves this or that kind of superhero, and most of the public believes them. Most of Trump's supporters apparently believe that his idiotic flailings are "perfect" and earth-shatteringly brilliant simply because he says they are. No proof needed.
I just want to make it clear that Droopy, aka McPoodle, is in now way related to Rudy Giuliani despite attempts by Evan to bestow the great name of McPoodle upon him.
Giuliani Claims Trump Could Never Have Got So Many Indictments Without His Help
By Andy Borowitz
August 17, 2023
NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)—Fuming about his unpaid legal bills, Rudolph Giuliani has claimed that Donald J. Trump could never have garnered so many indictments without his help.
“Those indictments didn’t happen all by themselves,” the former New York mayor told Fox News. “It took a village, and that village was me.”
Giuliani said that it was “particularly hurtful” that he had not been remunerated for obtaining Trump’s indictments since they have been so pivotal to the former President’s burgeoning lead in the Republican Presidential primary.
“Thanks to those indictments, he’s leading Ron DeSantis by double digits,” Giuliani said. “Now, I’m not making a threat here, but maybe if Trump doesn’t pay me I go to work for DeSantis as his lawyer. Yeah, maybe I do that. After a pinch or two of Rudy magic, you just watch those indictments roll in.”
Basic mistake, Trump. REAL mob bosses always - ALWAYS - look after underlings in legal trouble. Because THAT ENSURES THEY STAY LOYAL rather than desperate, disrespected, pissed off, and starting to consider how much their testimony against The Boss would be worth.
Rudy was Trump's 2IC through the attempted coup, he has a LOT of things he could say to both Jack Smith and Fani Willis. And Trump's blowing him off? Breaking promises and calmly watching him go under a bus?? JFC. Man can't even Mob Boss properly.
I have to wonder if Trump is running low on cash for lawyers given he is facing a gazillion indictments in 4 court cases all over the country. Plus all the other debts he wracked up over the years that are coming due, and "funding" his facade of a campaign.
If you're the kind of boss who whacks underlings to keep 'em quiet, that can work, but at some point it's not sustainable...but it doesn't matter here, because Trump ain't that guy.
Jenna Ellis is making the same noises: broke, big bills, Trump's nowhere to be found.
The prosecutors all need to buy special golden spatulas for all the flipping.
My loathing for Giuliani is wide, deep, old, and probably inexhaustible. His mayoralty was a travesty that ruined parts of NYC forever (goodbye, tacky and dirty Times Square, hello, Disneyfied tacky Times Square), and much of the 9/11 devastation was his fault exclusively. I've written about that before. I hope he spends the rest of his miserable life broke and in prison, his remaining assets having been seized for restitution. Despicable.
Roodles is simply one of the most ridiculous humans ever. Just imagine how he looks to the rest of the world:
- He very nearly shat his pants, twice, while trying to trot out bogus non-evidence to the Michigan legislature, just ask Jenna Ellis.
- Up From His Head Came a-Bubblin' Crude (stolen from somebody here)
- Drunken butt-dialing of journalist right before:
- BORAT and the "just adjusting [sure, Jan]."
And his pièce de résistance, the defining political moment of the century, neigh, the millennium: 4 Seasons Total Landscaping, and the delicious post-hoc attempt to save some sort of face by claiming that they wanted to be __outside__ of the Philadelphia city limits...
If that isn't the image of a moron leading a bunch of idiots, then I don't know what morons, or idiots are.
I don't understand why he needed to save face in the first place. People change the sites of events all the time, postpone them, cancel them even. If he had either relocated to a different (but respectable) location or if he had postponed/cancelled, nobody would remember it.
Rudy needs money?
I'm shocked. Shocked to my foundation.
He thinks he'll get money from Trump? Ask his contractors who were stiffed.
I have an idea for Rudy on how he can raise funds...dress down a little, grab a filthy rag and some Clorox and be a squeegee man on the exit from the Lincoln Tunnel! When he was Mayor of New York, he waged war on them to drive them away from that road entrance to New York!
Explaining to Donald that something "isn't a smart idea" won't work. Donald specializes in doing things that aren't smart ideas. If Rudy is going to Trump for money, he's going to keep leaving disappointed. He may have to sing like a whole chorus of songbirds to stay out of the pokey. When I read accounts of how he allegedly wrecked the lives of innocent election workers, I just can't work up any sympathy for this guy. If he's willing to do that kind of thing just to cling to the slenderest thread of proximity to power, what can anyone really say in his favor?
Rudy lost his mind years ago, maybe when his denture uppers glue started leaking into his brain. Dude spends millions on like a dozen country club memberships from dark dollars he receives from shady foreign figures looking to buy access to American politicians. He sold his fairly strong reputation to the MAGA movement and we know how well that ends. Now he’s a joke, with no credibility, disbarred in DC and NY, and a creepy sex perv manipulating troubled women. He fucked around with The Big Lie because he thought it was his ticket to sustaining his lifestyle and status in Trumpland. Now the bill has come due. Had he retired 10 years ago, sold his homes and downsized to a single retirement home and golf membership, he’d have been fine. He could have lived well on speaking and consulting fees. Who wants to pay this clown now?
The thing is, Rudy has ALWAYS been shady, as has PAB. All we needed to know was constantly revealed in SPY mag in the 80s, which I admit was kind of hard to read. The 9/11 stuff? One of the larger mishandled projects was siting the FDNY comms center adjacent to the Twin Towers, when it was supposed to be sited in Brooklyn (or wherever else, if memory serves.) Both Roodles and Fat Boy Orange are responsible for the deaths of many citizens. Sorry, rant over :///
It bothers me that every time we talk about Rhodes, we gotta do this "how far he's fallen" schtick, like his pre-drumpf record wasn't fraudulent bullshit. Like "broken windows" policing worked. During a tiny, traumatic window in time, when ppl all over the world were inclined to give even sub-mediocre authority figures the benefit of the doubt, he wasn't the COMPLETE shitbag he so clearly wanted to be.
If his bullshit has the staying power of Reagan worship, it'll be another decade at least before ppl start saying "actually, he was a pretty shit us attorney a worse mayor ."
People who throw themselves in front of any and all cameras tend to get this treatment. Vain, ambitious gasbags. All they have to do is declare themselves this or that kind of superhero, and most of the public believes them. Most of Trump's supporters apparently believe that his idiotic flailings are "perfect" and earth-shatteringly brilliant simply because he says they are. No proof needed.
He's always been a schmuck :((
Hello all you happy people;
I just want to make it clear that Droopy, aka McPoodle, is in now way related to Rudy Giuliani despite attempts by Evan to bestow the great name of McPoodle upon him.
Droopy Libeled!
'California fruit-and-nut farmers named Baldev and Kewel Munger' Specifially, farmers of the dingleberry ...
Maybe we should pray for himl…just fucking with you, I ain’t praying for a colonialist.
Rudy's Catholic. Suffering in this world translates into greater rewards in the next. He'll be fine.
"You just hate to hear it".
(voiceover) you do not actually hate to hear it.
"Rudy Giuliani Angry, Farty And Broke. Shame…"
---
Angry, farty Rudy going broke (angry, farty Rudy going bro-o-o-oke)
Angry, farty Rudy going broke (angry, farty Rudy going bro-o-o-oke)
Rudy! Farty Rudy!
Rudy! Farty Rudy!
(with apologies to Berry, Buck, Mills, Stipe, and Pierson)
Giuliani Claims Trump Could Never Have Got So Many Indictments Without His Help
By Andy Borowitz
August 17, 2023
NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)—Fuming about his unpaid legal bills, Rudolph Giuliani has claimed that Donald J. Trump could never have garnered so many indictments without his help.
“Those indictments didn’t happen all by themselves,” the former New York mayor told Fox News. “It took a village, and that village was me.”
Giuliani said that it was “particularly hurtful” that he had not been remunerated for obtaining Trump’s indictments since they have been so pivotal to the former President’s burgeoning lead in the Republican Presidential primary.
“Thanks to those indictments, he’s leading Ron DeSantis by double digits,” Giuliani said. “Now, I’m not making a threat here, but maybe if Trump doesn’t pay me I go to work for DeSantis as his lawyer. Yeah, maybe I do that. After a pinch or two of Rudy magic, you just watch those indictments roll in.”
Borowitz is one of the few reasons to get out of bed these days.
Basic mistake, Trump. REAL mob bosses always - ALWAYS - look after underlings in legal trouble. Because THAT ENSURES THEY STAY LOYAL rather than desperate, disrespected, pissed off, and starting to consider how much their testimony against The Boss would be worth.
Rudy was Trump's 2IC through the attempted coup, he has a LOT of things he could say to both Jack Smith and Fani Willis. And Trump's blowing him off? Breaking promises and calmly watching him go under a bus?? JFC. Man can't even Mob Boss properly.
I have to wonder if Trump is running low on cash for lawyers given he is facing a gazillion indictments in 4 court cases all over the country. Plus all the other debts he wracked up over the years that are coming due, and "funding" his facade of a campaign.
Is he broke, or is he an empty souled psychopath who discards people like used toilet paper the second they're no longer useful to him? Why not both?
I'm gonna go with both.
If you're the kind of boss who whacks underlings to keep 'em quiet, that can work, but at some point it's not sustainable...but it doesn't matter here, because Trump ain't that guy.
Jenna Ellis is making the same noises: broke, big bills, Trump's nowhere to be found.
The prosecutors all need to buy special golden spatulas for all the flipping.
I can imagine the Mad Lib now: Donnie [insert nickname] Trump was {verb] by a [noun] at a [adjective] [noun] with a [noun].
My loathing for Giuliani is wide, deep, old, and probably inexhaustible. His mayoralty was a travesty that ruined parts of NYC forever (goodbye, tacky and dirty Times Square, hello, Disneyfied tacky Times Square), and much of the 9/11 devastation was his fault exclusively. I've written about that before. I hope he spends the rest of his miserable life broke and in prison, his remaining assets having been seized for restitution. Despicable.
One can hope *fingers crossed*
It's ok, you can tell us how you really feel :-)
Roodles is simply one of the most ridiculous humans ever. Just imagine how he looks to the rest of the world:
- He very nearly shat his pants, twice, while trying to trot out bogus non-evidence to the Michigan legislature, just ask Jenna Ellis.
- Up From His Head Came a-Bubblin' Crude (stolen from somebody here)
- Drunken butt-dialing of journalist right before:
- BORAT and the "just adjusting [sure, Jan]."
And his pièce de résistance, the defining political moment of the century, neigh, the millennium: 4 Seasons Total Landscaping, and the delicious post-hoc attempt to save some sort of face by claiming that they wanted to be __outside__ of the Philadelphia city limits...
If that isn't the image of a moron leading a bunch of idiots, then I don't know what morons, or idiots are.
https://twitter.com/nanglish/status/1325242917519233024
https://twitter.com/wyattbunce/status/1325275240054681601
I don't understand why he needed to save face in the first place. People change the sites of events all the time, postpone them, cancel them even. If he had either relocated to a different (but respectable) location or if he had postponed/cancelled, nobody would remember it.
From someone here at Wonkette: Rudy vows to fight Georgia charges all the way to Supreme Courtyard Marriott.
He sounds like Sylvester the Cat in the second video.
Give me a transcription, fine. I just can't bring myself to click on the video.
Ahh...California..A bowl of granola. Proving that Baldev and Kewel Munger are the fruit, nuts and also the flakes.
Come on, Baldev maybe square but Kewel is rillly kewel!
speaking of farty i'm not sure exactly what happens when i ingest this much schadenfreude but you know what fuck it we ball. Bless you, Evan!
One minute of schadenfreude adds one week to your life. That's metric, of course.
Wish I could 'like' more than once.