Scandals That Rocked The Food Network To Its Core! Tabs, Wed., March 6, 2024
Okay. Morning news roundup!
Kyrsten Sinema is GTFO, and the bloggers, they are arguing. Is she the worst, or the 50th worst, they are asking while — of course they are — answering themselves that really she’s just exhausting because she dresses like that. (Ugh, guys, don’t.) I prefer the counterpoint: “Counterpoint: Kyrsten Sinema Is A Vicious Day-Glo Demon And The World Is Demonstrably Worse Because She Was Born, By Albert Burneko.” Her kicky fashions (minus the denim biker vest when she presided over the Senate, which really was Not Acceptable For the Occasion Just Like They All Bitched About John Fetterman’s Shorts) were the only good thing about her. (Defector)
Joe Biden, FIX. THIS. “Open-air” camps for migrants with no shelter, no blankets, only literal shit. (CNN)
No, this Joan Walsh column isn’t about the crap NYT/Siena poll last week. It’s about the crap NYT/Siena poll from 2022. Everybody breathe. (The Nation)
Oh lord, oh lord. The New York Times wrote 1100 words about a poll finding that a majority think Trump committed crimes, called it good news for Trump, and never once mentioned that the poll it was writing about found a majority thinks Trump committed crimes. (Jamison Foser)
Time to start the push polls. Nobody who isn’t reading Wonkette 14 times a day has even heard that Trump promised to be a dictator, do other bad shit badly too! And once they do? They don’t love it! (The New Republic)
This week the New York Times — no link — finally did a Bidenista safari with “the superfans” only to imply we’re all flighty old women who are kind of simple instead of being superfans because we can’t believe how much progressive shit he’s gotten done. And even while the NYT literally typed that “it’s mostly elderly women who just love his personality,” half of the interviews were with men who were like I CAN’T BELIEVE HOW MUCH PROGRESSIVE SHIT HE’S GOTTEN DONE. Anyway, I’m not at all ashamed of it, and as a Biden “superfan” I’m looking forward to what looks like a lively, lovely Biden interview in Not There. I’m saving it for myself, for a treat. (New Yorker)
“Sixty Minutes” interviewed a bunch of Moms 4 Bigotry, told them to cut the shit. (Daily Beast)
We found all the crime, it’s at Liberty University. (NPR)
Florida surgeon general lunatic giving all the little children the gift of measles. (The Guardian)
Hey you guys like nice things?
Medellin is … puts on Joe Biden Ray-Bans … chilling out. (Reasons to Be Cheerful)
Speaking of which, you guys ever see this “Cities on Speed: Bogota Change”? Take 59 minutes and join us in joyfully shouting MOCKUS! every time you see, like, traffic mimes or similar for the rest of your life. Which will probably be rare, because most of us do not live in places run by GOOD crazy people with GREAT IDEAS, OF FUN. MOCKUS! That guy’s the best!
And here’s another! Women in Uganda are using food scraps as fuel! (Reasons to Be Cheerful, again!)
Your friend Sally made this cool as hell thing!
Literally everyone in the world says don’t bother making your own puff pastry, KING ARTHUR BAKING, but here’s their recipe for pastelitos anyway, obviously don’t make your own puff pastry. Mmmmmm pastelitos. (King Arthur Baking)
Food network escandalos!!! (Mashed)
Did you see our, did you see our sweetest tattoos? They are marvelous, collect them all!
If you are shopping on Amazon anyway, this button gives us a small commission on everything you put in your cart until you check out (unless you close the tab first without buying). You can also find it on our homepage on the left hand side under “clickies.”
(Only if you want to!)
I think you all will enjoy learning a little about our hed gif artist, Bordalo II: https://open.substack.com/pub/martiniambassador/p/bordalo-ii
Those are some rockin’ Tabs, ‘Becca!