81 Comments
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SigDeFlyinMonky's avatar

For most people the Bible is like those software licensing agreements. Nobody reads the whole thing, they just click on the "I agree" box.

Skwerl the taco hunter's avatar

Has Koch Labs verified this yet?

SigDeFlyinMonky's avatar

And if enough Oklahoma rednecks shoot enough road signs with shotguns they eventually will write the complete works of Shakespeare in braille.

From Scranton With Love's avatar

Thanks. That would be about right. Droughts out west really got going around 1986.

From Scranton With Love's avatar

Don't be crackin' on those responsible gun owners now.

Jayleia Green's avatar

It goes in, it goes out. YOU CAN'T EXPLAIN THAT!

Keith Rodgers's avatar

I reserve my nonsensical opinion until I hear from Dr. Rush Limbaugh.

Mormos's avatar

i feel bad for the scientists who had to live in Oklahoma though.

From Scranton With Love's avatar

That's my second pat answer to those idiots. It's just that the molecules are arranged differently now.

Arcturus's avatar

Gee I'm glad the research is impressive. It will make my storing up of canned food, water and ammo so much more fun.

𝔅𝔢𝔢𝔩𝔷𝔢𝔟𝔲𝔟𝔟𝔞's avatar

Carbon dioxide molecules have a well-known liberal bias.

(And don't believe atoms: they make up everything.)

Arcturus's avatar

That's because

We are stardustWe are goldenWe are billion year-old carbon.

Those fucking hippies were right!

mailman27's avatar

"Billion year old carbon." All these years I thought it was something about the "devil's bargain." The carbon makes more sense.

Arcturus's avatar

You are also correct... but that is in the last verse only.

Royal Ugly Dude's avatar

This won't matter to climate deniers, as David Hume argued the formation of beliefs can be independent of experience (As it happens, that's the only part of the Enlightenment conservatives find useful).