154 Comments

But can your dog speak LOUD with a Moldovan accent?

Expand full comment

What is this "logic" you speak of?

Expand full comment

My dog does loud.

Expand full comment

Topped with a narrow little strip of bean sprouts.

Expand full comment

Hot Sweaty Tuber on Pudding Cup Action!

Expand full comment

... I showed my dog this - "see what happens when you chase cars?" Ryan Bundy shoulda stayed on the porch.

Expand full comment

I have a dog. My dog is no Orly Taitz.

Expand full comment

What about applesauce?

Expand full comment

Srsly? Lap dances from Sheriff Joe or Larry Klayman? Think what you're saying, I beg of you!!!!!

Expand full comment

Your dog is way better looking.

Expand full comment

I'm always being told his kind of diet is instance death, yet he's about to turn 80 and still "working."

Expand full comment

Mmmm. Brazilian meat. Brb.

Expand full comment

Oh they'll think up a reason as to why the Hildebeest isn't legitimately the president, too.

Expand full comment

papadum are the fried salty wafers that are the size of a saucer. You might be thinking of pakora

Expand full comment

Residents of Maricopa County ask that question all the time. Just one of Arpaio's disputes with other county officials has cost taxpayers more than $30 million. The tab for his racial profiling dispute with the Feds had cost $20 million two years ago and is still on-going. He's been forced to pay damages of up to about $3 million (multiple times!) for wrongful treatment of other public officials. The Sheriff's office has been successfully sued for tens of millions of dollars for wrongful deaths, illegal arrests, and injuries to the public during his tenure.

In 2014 the Arizona Republic (a conservative newspaper) estimated the costs to taxpayers of Arpaio's lost lawsuits at $44 million adding that it "... does not include county officials’ investigation into Sheriff’s Office budgeting. That probe found that $111million in taxpayer money was misspent since 2004. The investigation became a central point in one of the legal battles between the supervisors and Arpaio."

He long ago emptied the county's generous budget for hiring defenders of the Sheriff's office and is now draining an "incidentals" budget meant for other unanticipated county costs. I don't know how anything he does could be considered "unanticipated."

Expand full comment

Don't forget, folks, Ole Joe is running for reelection, so if you want to keep these hilarious articles coming, you better cough up a contribution to his campaign. He only has $3.8 million in his coffers at this point (most came from out-of-state). And don't blame his tenure on native Arizonans. The majority of his vocal supporters and his famous appointed "posse" are retirees who moved to Maricopa County from the Midwest.

Expand full comment