Screw MTV: Tea Party Makes Own Show About Unwed Colonial Mothers

Uh, hurray! Coming soon to an Internet-capable computer near you is the world's first Tea Party teevee series, not about Michele Bachmann's trademark "demon eyes" makeup secrets like you might think, but an ultra-bizarre historical drama about an unmarried colonial teen mom named Sarah Palin Pine and how everyone in town must hunt down the man who impregnated her and force the pair to get married. Here is the creator, wealthy Hollywood wingnut James Patrick Riley, on why he made the show: "Hollywood tends to make over the past in its own image – 18^thcentury women become raging feminists; statesmen become agnostics or rakes." Which, awesome, since it will be one of those nice God-fearin' and woman-beatin' shows everyone has been waiting for to remind America of why it is great. AMAZING TRAILER after the jump:

Here is the trailer. We could not tell what it was about from this, so we had to look at the IMDB page. The trailer is more of a postmodern pastiche of confusing accents, sobbing ladies, out-of-focus walking shots of angry men in bad wigs, and magnificent lines such as, "the governor will not be there to unsoil your great white breeches." AUTOMATIC WRITING EMMY.

Riley still does not have a distributor for his masterwork, so you are stuck with this single episode until Glenn Beck signs on as executive producer. [ Hollywood Reporter ]