Sean Duffy, Take A Flying F*ck At THE MOOOOOON

Dude's afraid of the subway, but he's going to take on THE MOOOOOON?

Photo by Jake Weirick on Unsplash

How is President Donald John Trump’s regime trying to distract from the fact that he’s an adjudicated sexual predator whose name is all over the Epstein Files, is fixing to steal more elections and put Jack Smith and his opponents in pris… LOOK, AMERICA, SEAN DUFFY IS GONNA STEAL THE MOON FOR YOU! 🇺🇸🦅🚀🌝 !!

Yep, Transportation Secretary Sean Duffy says he’s gonna build a nuclear reactor on the moon so the sneaky Chinese don’t steal the moon first! Duffy does enjoy mooning. Wait, what? Why? How? What?

Ascending to outer space is something cults like Heaven’s Gate, the Mormons, Children of God, and Scientologists, etc. have always been promising their members. And though Elon Musk has been banished back to his sperm ranch, guess the aspiration to run government by misreading dystopian Sci Fi cautionary tales goes on. Synergy for the base!

But didn’t Trump just gut NASA with the biggest spending cut ever, whittling it to the smallest size it’s been since 1961? How is The Duffster going to build a whole-ass reactor to populate the moon without any rocket- or space-scientists? Does NASA even have the capability right now to fly even the Epstein Files to the moon, when it could not rescue two stranded astronauts without Elon Musk’s help, and is busy crashing its own satellites so nobody will find out that CO2 exists, and all?

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Trump Orders NASA To Crash Perfectly Good CO2 Satellite For No Reason At All

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Sean Duffy can’t fix potholes on the interstate, but he can figure out how to build a nuclear reactor so people can live on the moon, sure! Also whatever happened to the SPACE FORCE, aren’t they the ones who are supposed to be dominating space?

But that is the plan. Duffy — with the help of Jeff Bezos, or Jesus, or somebody, TBD — is going to build a nuclear reactor on the moon, to sustain life there.

He explained,

“We're in a race to the moon, in a race with China to the moon. And to have a base on the moon, we need energy. And some of the key locations on the moon, we're going to get solar power. But this fission technology is critically important, and so we've spent hundreds of millions of dollars studying, can we do it? We are now going to move beyond studying, and we are going to make this a reality. We have given direction to go. Let's start to deploy our technology, to move to actually make this a reality.

“If we’re going to sustain life on the moon and go to Mars, this technology is critically important.”

But, but, but, we were told solar technology was GREEN ENERGY SCAM? And why would we even want to sustain life on the moon and Mars, when the US seems to be having a hard enough time keeping its own airplanes in the sky, and the country is so broke it had to fire 148,000 federal employees and take away poor people’s healthcare and hungry schoolchildren’s lunches?

To DOMINATE and manifest some kind of destiny, we guess. And/or for the chosen few to live on after an apocalypse! Cults always need a distant and glorious achievement, on a celestial plane far, far away, to keep followers’ eyes on the stars and not the guys picking their pockets. I believe that Trump has a plan for all of us. I believe that plan involves me getting my own planet!

But, the Outer Space Treaty, signed by the US and 116 other countries, says that nobody can own the moon. And in 2021 China and Russia announced joint plans to build a shared research station on the surface, including for a lunar nuclear reactor to power it, targeted to be up and running by 2036. And 13 other countries are now involved in the project.

The sensible, polite, treaty-following and cost-efficient thing to do — if one were worried about China and Russia building a moon station as a pretext to spy on the US or put bombs there and/or begin staking a claim and colonizing the place and mining for minerals, or whatever, before anybody else gets a chance — would be to join all of those other countries at the space station. Learn more moon science, keep an eye on what everybody else is up to. But nooo, the regime hates every other filthy stinking country on this earth, plus most of the citizens of the US itself, for that matter. So now Team Trump is gonna colonize some maybe wannabe colonizers first, bitch! Then Sydney Sweeney and Barron Trump are going to get married and colonize the whole universe with their tall, busty, Aryan genes. And Elon Musk, you and your spawn are not on the list.

Seems mighty ambitious! Maybe Sean Duffy should start by building just a toolshed on the moon, or a house in a bubble for an astronaut squirrel to live in, before going all in on an entire nuclear reactor to steal the moon and make it no Chinese allowed.

Hey, stealing the moon, wasn’t that also a plot of Despicable Me?

As nice as it would be if all of the billionaires (except the woke ones like George Soros, David Rubenstein, Mackenzie Scott, and Melinda French, of course) colonized the moon and left the rest of us alone to have a democracy, can’t see it happening. Trump shoveling billions to government-contracting insiders to build some rockets, you can sure see that, you bet! Trump accepting advance deposits in crypto for Trump Tower Moon units, like totally.

But the Chinese and all of their scientist friends have been leapfrogging ahead with space technology while the US has been sitting and pouting in a corner nattering about chemtrails. Any space race to dominate and colonize the moon is not going to be won by a government of people who think the weather is a Deep State conspiracy. Science doesn’t care about your feelings!

And neither does China! There’s still no rare earth minerals deal with them, and the Chinese clearly have no interest in selling any to the US after Trump went Tasmanian devil at them on tariffs and is revoking Chinese students’ visas. And China owns about 70 percent of the world’s supply of minerals necessary to make a variety of rocket components, microchips, and other high-tech shit would-be space-colonizers require. Whoops, another self-punch in the ‘nads!

So good luck with all that, Sean Duffy.

At least you kept Epstein out of the news cycle for one story!

[ABC / South China Morning Post / Bonus from Popular Mechanics: “A Brief History of the Ludicrous (And Misguided) Plots to Blow Up the Moon”]

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