276 Comments
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Saviour of Bread's avatar

I think the mistake was allocating the fleet tender USS Booth to that carrier.

Trespassers Will's avatar

Also not great that it all takes place in the middle-eastern theater

Vic's avatar

Hey, at least we're not talking about the Trump-Epstein files?

So, Mission AcCOMplished! See? Nah nah.

Baconzgood's avatar

*tee-hee*

You said "bush".

Saviour of Bread's avatar

When the USN decommissions it they’ll sell it to Brazil.

Mavenmaven's avatar

Hegseth is best at killing innocent defenseless fishermen from far away, in other words, he's not military but a bully and a criminal.

Ruhe's avatar
8mEdited

So which military action hero do we think Hegseth imagines himself as. Not Jack Reacher, for sure. Richman is just ridiculously big and Cruise combines a cool menace with genuine compassion in Reacher the way he does in M.I. Hegseth wouldn't even like a guy like that.

Bourne? Nope. Hegseth is never troubled by his past, his current situation or the choices he has to make. He's like a toddler sitting at a PlaySkool work desk..."Look at me! I a worker-man!"

I got it. Segal, 'cause in Hegseth's mind "That guy is too stronger than he looks, you boys."

Daniel's avatar

"Hope people didn’t think we were exaggerating when we said Hegseth clearly thinks they’re suckers and losers just like Trump does. He just thinks it in a different way, in that we guess he resents every member of the service who’s better and smarter and stronger than him, which at this point looks like it’s literally all of them."

I know it doesn't matter, but I interpret it differently. I think he's internalised completely the idea that being in the military means dying for your country. It's not something you should try to avoid, it's something you should embrace. He doesn't need to, yet, but he's convinced he's prepared to. He thinks that all soldiers* are embracing a glorious death wish upon joining, because that's what his bullshit he-man crusader club machismo bullshit cult says it is. He is basically every propagandist from the First World War before it was more than a year old, every Kamikaze instructor (though not pilot), every dagger-in-the-teeth arditi fanboy but brylcreamed and with hands softer than his face. He will impose torturous austerity on his underlings, even to the point of driving them insane, because he fully believes he could tolerate that himself and that being in the armed forces requires it.

*used generically, I know you don't use it for everyone in every armed service

MRK's avatar

He's the guy who wrote the book on being a Samurai despite being a bureaucrat who spent his entire life behind his desk and barely knew which end of the sword to hold.

Daniel's avatar

"Do you like it?"

"Erm..."

"You know, not a lot of chicks are cool enough to be into this."

"..."

"But I knew you would be. You know, their credo, the warrior ethos of Nikon, is called Bukkake. And in that culture honor was the highest honor. And only the elitest of warriors could get a katana, [gestures] with a dragon painted. Right. On. The. Blade."

"..."

"You see that? Yeah. Right on the blade. It means I'm what they call a rodin."

Thesaurus Wrecks 2547's avatar

I tried living like one of Pete Hegseth’s naval troops for a week. The results were fascinating.

By The NY Times

Bagels of Doom's avatar

Next week: Live like a sailor - the new Navy Diet

Thesaurus Wrecks 2547's avatar

If you don’t know what I’m mocking….

NYT: The Most Powerful Men in America Are bating Only Steak and Sauerkraut. Could I?

I ate like Robert F. Kennedy Jr. for a week. The results were fascinating.

https://www.nytimes.com/2026/08/04/magazine/trump-rfk-steak-kimchi-diet.html?eafs_enabled=false

Diane's Less Hostile Username's avatar

Pointed at both ends, last 3-7 seconds, and do not wipe.

Craig Nixon's avatar

Sinker or floater?

Bagels of Doom's avatar

Steak and sauerkraut? They can't even do Cooking like Germans right.

Craig Nixon's avatar

ngl, I could prob survive on steak & kimchi.

Bagels of Doom's avatar

I'm not a huge fan of steak, and would go for something slow cooked instead, but yeah. I'd make some horse radish sauce and potatoes to go with it.

Craig Nixon's avatar

They're bating steak?

I knew they were all perverts.

Bagels of Doom's avatar

Secretary Prissy von Dressing Room can go keelhaul himself.

Saviour of Bread's avatar

As a comparator, the UK Secretary of Defence is a gay Cambridge graduate who grew up in a single parent family on a council estate.

As far as I know he eschews public pull-ups and the dressing up box.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wes_Streeting

Bagels of Doom's avatar

Looks like a fairly anodyne politician. I would like to go back to the days where we had those instead of these obnoxious showboats.

Saviour of Bread's avatar

I had to look up who it was, which is a good thing.

Bagels of Doom's avatar

That's perfect, especially in a position such as his.

Vic's avatar

Decency, class, and intelligence that no Republican will ever have. Pete is a professional goofball, and thus a fine Republican.

Up Here in the Clouds's avatar

OT: I (almost probably, BI-RADS 3) do not have breast cancer!!!!!!!

*collapses in relief on couch*

Please clap.

My mom is far more interested in watching the Ripple Fiber neighborhood install guys than knowing her kid and primary caretaker does not have breast cancer.

Schmannity's avatar

Abraham Lincoln can't free the slaves of the carrier.

HoldOnOldChap's avatar

The navy should spend the money on something else, and tell him they changed the catapults. They could add a gadget that blows out some steam from the slot.

Daniel's avatar

This isn't your woke military, alright? This is a different animal. This is an animal called "the jungle". And it's no book.

And you're welcome to the jungle, where we've got fun and games- but there's a couple of things you should know. These games are not fun, and they're not games. They're the marks of what makes a man. You play rough, you win. You win, you don't lose. Because losers? They don't WIN. Because winning is the only thing. Winning and strength. So you know where you are? You're in the jungle baby. You know what's going to happen? You're gonna die. Unless you're tough. FA and you'll FO. Because it'll bring you to your sha-na-na-na. Na-na-na-na-na. Na-na-na-knees.

Knees.

Bear is Under-Cubbed's avatar

COCAINE IS FOR CLOSERS!

What? No, I said "coffee". I SAID "COFFEE"!!1!1!

EyeQueue's avatar

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Bobathonic, Dingus Crusher's avatar

What, no strength and muscle and jungle work?

R. Riddle's avatar

I looked up the longest deployment for a ship in modern times and it seems to be a carrier during the Vietnam conflict that was deployed for a year.

The thing that seems to be different about this is the supply lines to keep the ship functioning. It looks like a complete breakdown in logistics. That's an aspect of the story that's not getting enough attention.

Why, exactly, aren't these personnel getting what they need? Why aren't the Dems in Congress vigorously making noise on this and how it falls directly on Whiskey Pete's soldiers?

455 Rocket Cat, Space Donkey's avatar

They are too busy witchhunting and condemning socialists within while hustling up military and ICE contracting opportunities. ABH.

"M"'s avatar

"The thing that seems to be different about this is the supply lines to keep the ship functioning. It looks like a complete breakdown in logistics. That's an aspect of the story that's not getting enough attention."

Absolutely this

Couldn't be because Donald is also an inveterate liar and the Strait is actually CLOSED, could it

?

Trespassers Will's avatar

There were probably admirals, etc, that would have seen to all of this, but they believed in honor and inclusion and had to be let go.

SunMoonStars's avatar

I read that earlier this week and the more I read the worse it gets. The moron mafia could give a fuck less if everyone on that ship died. Their incompetence is killing millions and every R up there doesn't give a fuck.

Yopi's avatar

I am worry for the brass. Is the wine supply ok?

Chemical's avatar

Honestly, I think the brass onboard that carrier is roughing it just as bad as enlisted crew are. If they weren't, then the crew probably would have thrown them overboard and sailed away by now.