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GMT's avatar

Oh Come On! The alcoholic Hegseth probably loves gay sex more than he does with his stepford wife. I mean those stepfords can get sooo boring! He’s all about Mano a Mano!

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Jennifer's avatar

“Warfighter”? Nah.

“Cosplay aficionado”? Yup.

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Peter MacMonagle's avatar

Hegseth and the rest of trump's cabinet are all DEI hires.

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KEITH TAYLOR's avatar

This character is, indeed, a pathetic overcompensating mean girl bitch.

He will never remotely possess the guts of, oh, just at random, Senator Tammy Duckworth or Brigadier General Harriet Tubman, or even Ripley in the ALIEN franchise - and the latter is fictional.

But how he poses and pretends to be more macho than Genghis Khan.

(I'm not a Temujin fan, by the way. I regard him as one of history's great bastards, like Napoleon and Shaka the Zulu king.)

Hegseth seems to regard the medieval crusaders as the acme of warrior manhood also, if his book AMERICAN CRUSADE and his "Deus Vult" tattoo are reliable signs. He's probably as ignorant of the actual history of the Crusades as he is of everything else. The initial wave of the First Crusade was made up of ignorant yokels who swarmed over Christian lands such as Hungary and Bulgaria like a plague of locusts, mostly unaware that the inhabitants even were Christian. The disciplined forces of Godfrey, Raymond and Bohemond followed, and were more impressive militarily, but when they took Jerusalem they turned the Holy City into a hell where their horses splashed ferock deep in blood. They spared neither man, woman nor child, and as they butchered they howled "Deus vult!" The leaders didn't try to restrain the massacre, and if they had, they wouldn't have been obeyed.

Second Crusade? Came to nothing due to petty disagreements and quarrels among its leaders. The Third? The one with Richard the Lionheart in it? Had some success at Acre, but failed to retake Jerusalem from Saladin, which was the main idea, and from there onward the enthusiasm for crusading hit a steady decline, marked time and again by the crusader forces' treachery and fratricide towards fellow Christians.

The Lionheart himself? Maybe he became a legend, but in person he was a brutal, warlike butcher, and like the other Plantagenets, a bad debtor on a huge scale. Hegseth would also be quite upset to hear that Richard was very possibly homosexual. Married to Princess Berengaria for years, he conspicuously couldn't stand to be near her. He was more affectionate and intimate with King Phillip II of France, who accompanied him as a joint leader on the Third Crusade, but later picked up his toys and went home, perhaps as a result of a lovers' quarrel with Lionheart.

Deus Vult indeed and truly, hey, Secretary Shitfaced?

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lordpnut's avatar

Nice takedown. I was just going to make a "barfighter" joke and compare him to Eddie from BARFLY. Il miglior fabro.

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RRJKR's avatar

Why name ships, bases , buildings and streets after anyone?. Just give them all prefixes, to designate what they are, and a number. No chance of confusion due to mispronunciation, no possibility of dirt coming out about the honoree, and nobody can take offense.

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Fifth Dentist's avatar

I know! We'll rename the ships after those white yahoos who were holding the signs and demonstrating as the National Guard was escorting that scared little black girl into the school.

"USS Betty Lou"

"USS Bobby Lee"

"USS Vickie Sue"

"USS Ricky Jimbob"

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Heather Coman's avatar

You keep me sane. Much thanks.

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Marcus Damicus's avatar

No women or non-white men need apply. Even for a ship name.

Fuckheads. It's fuckheads all the way down.

Fuck Ted Cruz.

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Opiwan's avatar

Yeah, "what a knob" covered that perfectly.

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thephantomcheese's avatar

Just a reminder to any military personnel who dislike the Secretary of Defense and/or your Commander-in-Chief:

Your JOB is to disobey illegal orders.

So when they want to inevitably declare marital law, it's up to y'all to stand up and say "Sir, no sir!"

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Stranger Than Friction's avatar

Why do the MAGA RWNJ assholes want to revert names back to the confederacy? Why do they want to name the country's bases and ships after LOSERS who LOST the Civil War? Can *Hic*seth BE any louder or more clear about his insecurities and ignorance? Trumpie, you're doing a heckuva job, filling your cabinet and regime with such crimey, venal, ignorant, stupid LOSERS.

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thephantomcheese's avatar

Because, in their tiny little minds, they agree with the immortal words of Hank Williams Jr. that "If the South woulda won, we'd have it made!"

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Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

Security at that NATO meeting about Ukraine just went up 1,000% with Blackout's snub.

Also, too:

“I hope they never name a ship after this tool, you know that bitch will leak.”

That there's milspec level snark.

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Wondering Woman's avatar

Bet Kegsbreath does GIRL pushups. And lies about how many he does. I know things have changed in the Navy, but I'd love to have ol' Pete attend a really rockin' Neptune ceremony.

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cmd Human Scum's avatar

I’m so sick of these motherfucking warfighters on this motherfucking cabinet.

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Zyxomma's avatar

Ta, Evan. Sneaky Pete will always be insecure, small minded, and stupid. No way to go through life.

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Mark Lungo's avatar

Next, they'll start naming ships after the *real* heroes of the civil rights movement: the USS James Earl Ray, the USS George Wallace, the USS Lester Maddox, the USS Bull Connor...

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