Senate Republicans Begging Trump Please No Helping With Primaries This Time, Please Please Please

SPOILER: He's going to help.

Funny little article in The Hill this morning says that Senate Republicans just really don't want Donald Trump to help with the 2024 primaries the way he did in 2022. Remember that? Trump kept endorsing batshit crazy idiot people everybody hated, and then most of them lost. Really gross stupid idiots like Herschel Walker and Blake Masters. Only J.D. Vance won, and he's an actual pile of human butthair, but Ohio is also a really red state now, so we guess that's what they're into.

Anyway, the end result was that "red wave" was just what happens when Trump throws a bunch of ketchup at the wall at the same time.

Why are they so ungrateful? Everybody is so ungrateful. And apparently they think it's somehow bad that Trump is under 34 indictments (so far), and do not assume that everybody will vote for Trump to stand up against all the rank persecutions he is enduring. The Hill says Senate Republicans view him as a "political liability."

Show of hands: Who thinks Donald Trump will stay out of the 2024 Republican primaries, especially considering he is also grifting/running for president?

GOP lawmakers and strategists fear Trump will mire GOP candidates in debates over his pet issues such as election fraud and defunding the Department of Justice instead of issues that more voters care about, such as the economy, inflation and health care.

What?

And they worry that Trump’s endorsements again will be more driven by how he perceives candidates’ loyalty to him and his agenda than on their electability in November.

What?

These are the exact reasons Democrats always love it so much when Trump lends a hand.

Of course, it should be noted that Republicans are absurdly unpopular in general, and their fascist partisan hack Supreme Court and other handpicked child judges keep stripping people of their rights and bodily autonomy, and people keep getting massacred by guns Republicans refuse to regulate. So it's not like Trump helping or not helping is likely to be the deciding factor on how much Republicans lose in 2024.

Here is Minority Whip John Thune saying Trump fuck off, Trump fuck off, Trump fuck off:

“Sure seems like that would be helpful based on our lack of success in 2022,” he said.

(The Hill notes that Mitch McConnell has had a concussion. Otherwise we assume he'd also be in this article saying Trump fuck off, Trump fuck off, Trump fuck off.)

Here is Lindsey Graham saying Trump should fuck off, but he knows Trump won't fuck off:

“If I were him, I’d focus on his own election, but I doubt if he’ll take that advice,” said Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.).

Oh dear, it's fun when they're all going to lose.

The Hill specifically mentions Arizona, Georgia and Pennsylvania as places where Trump picked just the absolute grossest losers, who then lost. Pat Toomey, the Republican whose seat John Fetterman and Mehmet Oz competed for, had this to say:

“President Trump had to insert himself and that changed the nature of the race and that created just too much of an obstacle,” Toomey told CNN in November, explaining why he thought celebrity doctor Mehmet Oz, whom Trump backed in the primary, lost to now-Sen. John Fetterman (D-Pa.).

LOL.

Mitt Romney says it is the "consensus view" among Senate Republicans that Trump should please stop helping before he starts this time around:

“I hope he stays out because him getting involved last time led to us losing key Senate races we could have won,” he said. “I think it’s viewed [that way] by almost every single member of the caucus, if not all of them, but I think few will say it because they don’t want to get the wrath of Donald Trump.”

Haha, they all hate him so much. The Hill also quotes a bunch of Republican strategists who mostly say their own version of fuck off.

Anyway, it's a really weird year in 2024. Democrats have to defend a lot of seats in the Senate. Meanwhile, Republicans are kind of sitting pretty. You would think it would be smooth sailing for them. But again, Trump will probably help, and he's their leading presidential contender, and he'll probably be under multiple indictments and/or on trial in multiple jurisdictions — including for his role in inciting a literal actual terrorist attack against America in his effort to overturn the 2020 election. Everybody hates that guy, in general.

And also everybody hates Republicans and all these young people are furious and motivated to vote because they really don't want to be killed in a mass shooting while having to flee their state to get abortions.

So there's that.

Enjoy losing all the time some more, Republicans!

[ The Hill ]

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