49 Comments

That beats the hell out of my giant soap bubble explanation. (I had the surface tension thing all wrong, dammit!)

Have you considered freelancing as a consultant to the Creationists? I assume they have an institute somewhere where they cook up their pseudo-scientific explanations -- you could have a bit of fun seeing how far out you can get before they figure out they're being Poe'd. Heck, they might never figure it out. (I wonder what they pay...)

Expand full comment

Somebody needs the cut the author with Occam's razor.

Expand full comment

What do the rest rooms look like by now?

Expand full comment

He knew it was gonna happen all along. No wonder He was always in a smiting mood.

Expand full comment

"The shelves of land around the continents, as well as many mountains in the sea, appear to have been dry land at one time."

No, they don't . . . not yet, anyway ... but let's not let the facts get in the way of a good fairy tale.

Expand full comment

Where are the state standards for science education?

I'd actually have little objection to teaching this crap, if the kids also got real science on the side, as it were, just so they knew how the real world works. That should be a requriement in any rational society.

Expand full comment

God made the universe with the photons <i>already on their way</i>, obviously.

(Actual answer from a creationist . . . the snark is built-in with these folks.)

Expand full comment

It would seem that Bill Cosby got it wrong, because Noah would surely have replied, "Riiiiiiight. . . . What's rain?"

Expand full comment

Not in Genesis, but "white as snow" is a popular phrase elsewhere.

Expand full comment

but "white <strike>as snow</strike> is right" is a popular phrase elsewhere.

Fixed.

Expand full comment

I RIDE WITH MOSES.

Expand full comment

Silly Knocker...Humans have never left the atmosphere. All of that "moon landing", "satellites around Uranus" stuff is all just special effects. The only time humans actually tried to leave the atmosphere was the Challenger mission. I think God's reaction to people violating His natural laws speaks volumes.

Expand full comment

(e) none of the above should have been an option, but only if the "teacher" knows more than jack shit.

Expand full comment