So in our story yesterday on the Congressional debate over just how deeply Jesus wants food stamps to be cut, we missed a tiny detail that is probably worth mentioning. One of the special flowers seeking to slash the Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program, aka food stamps, was Tennessee Bible-humper Stephen Fincher, who argued against feeding the hungry by quoting Jesus's message of love and indifference in Matthew chapter 26: "the poor will always be with us, and they will always be nasty tricksy takerses. They takes the precious and we hates them, we do."
Try not to use up all of your rage on despising Fincher:
&quot;Several Republicans talked about their Christianity and said the Bible encourages people to help each other but doesn&#039;t dictate what the federal government should do. &quot;We should be doing this as individuals, helping the poor,&quot; said &quot; <a href="http:\/\/www.redding.com\/news\/2012\/feb\/18\/lamalfas-47-million-in-farm-subsidies-draw\/" target="_blank"> Rep. Doug LaMalfa, R-Calif.</a>
The &quot;Party of Stupid&quot; is also the Party of Hyporitical Douchebags.
Probably not locusts, but <a href="http:\/\/www.britannica.com\/EBchecked\/topic\/581818\/tamarisk-manna-scale" target="_blank">trabutina mannipara</a>. They produce the stuff Coleridge was talking about: &quot;for he on honey-dew hath fed&quot;. The source of milk of paradise has not yet been identified.
Interestingly, that was a favorite verse of <a href="http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/He_who_does_not_work,_neither_shall_he_eat#Soviet_Union" target="_blank">Lenin</a>. Is Fincher a Communist?
<blockquote>Son of God Jesus Christ was unavailable for comment at press time, as He was busy saving some &mdash; but not all &mdash; children from a tornado.</blockquote>
When did Jesus get out of prison? That was where everyone seemed to be finding him all the time...
Our union shop steward would like a word with you.
Fincher collects money from heaven, so why not the poorz?
great. now i need to start drinking again.
Try not to use up all of your rage on despising Fincher:
&quot;Several Republicans talked about their Christianity and said the Bible encourages people to help each other but doesn&#039;t dictate what the federal government should do. &quot;We should be doing this as individuals, helping the poor,&quot; said &quot; <a href="http:\/\/www.redding.com\/news\/2012\/feb\/18\/lamalfas-47-million-in-farm-subsidies-draw\/" target="_blank"> Rep. Doug LaMalfa, R-Calif.</a>
The &quot;Party of Stupid&quot; is also the Party of Hyporitical Douchebags.
Probably not locusts, but <a href="http:\/\/www.britannica.com\/EBchecked\/topic\/581818\/tamarisk-manna-scale" target="_blank">trabutina mannipara</a>. They produce the stuff Coleridge was talking about: &quot;for he on honey-dew hath fed&quot;. The source of milk of paradise has not yet been identified.
Interestingly, that was a favorite verse of <a href="http:\/\/en.wikipedia.org\/wiki\/He_who_does_not_work,_neither_shall_he_eat#Soviet_Union" target="_blank">Lenin</a>. Is Fincher a Communist?
If the poors can&#039;t get food stamps, they might have to pick Fincher&#039;s cotton for substandard food and lodging.
I feel pitch fork poky myself.
Stephen Fincher - fuck you
<blockquote>Son of God Jesus Christ was unavailable for comment at press time, as He was busy saving some &mdash; but not all &mdash; children from a tornado.</blockquote>
When did Jesus get out of prison? That was where everyone seemed to be finding him all the time...
Blessed are the Tea Baggers, for they shall inherit the Earth. Well, the parts of it that they haven&#039;t completely fucked, at any rate.
You are assuming that he didn&#039;t? How can we be sure he hasn&#039;t already done this seven times.
I am not saying that he has, but why won&#039;t he prove that he hasn&#039;t?
Seven times.
We are all overlooking one basic fact:
If God wanted these kids to eat, he would make manna fall from the heavens to feed them.
MMmmMmMMm... Bug poop...