The 467,923 Stupidest Things Fox News Said About Trump's Taxes Yesterday
The 347,865th one might surprise you!
Donald Trump tantrumed all day Thursday about the Supreme Court, which effectively ruled that he is not the orange god-king of the world, and that he most certainly absolutely is subject to scrutiny from Congress and from the Manhattan DA. You might be wondering what Fox News had to say about it, and luckily, Wonkette is here to cheat off Media Matters and tell you.
We imagine there were some stupid things said during Fox News's primetime hours, some Mean Girl scoffing from Ingraham, maybe something about how this is all Black people's fault from Tucker, something about how Hillary Clinton and George Soros probably threatened to do Benghazi to Kavanaugh and Gorsuch from Hannity.
But we are relatively certain nothing could be stupider than Fox News contributor Katie Pavlich, the editor of TownHall.com, who own goaled herself faster than a dumb soccer player who kicks their soccer ball right into their own goal, like a stupid idiot:
PAVLICH: The accusation has been that President Trump is not releasing his tax returns, simply because he is hiding something. We don't actually know that, because we have not seen them.
That's it. That's all 467,923 stupidest things said on Fox News yesterday. Every one of them is that single stupid thing Katie Pavlich said.
Are we even supposed to respond to that? Back in the olden timey days, that's why presidential candidates and sitting presidents would release their fucking tax returns and oh my god we are not explaining this, it is not necessary for our readers and it is far over Pavlich's head.
Of course, Pavlich is correct, in a sense. We don't know what Trump is hiding, if anything, in his tax returns and financial records. Of course, we have some evidence that there might be a fuckton of fraud, and a hunch there might be some Russian money sources in there that Trump doesn't want us to know about. Oh yeah, and that he's not as rich as he says he is. That old thing.
Want more Fox News dumbshittery? Here is Lou Dobbs saying the Supreme Court is trying to "overthrow" Donald Trump. Remember, yesterday's rulings, both of them, were 7-2, so Lou Dobbs must mean Neil Gorsuch and Brett Kavanaugh are trying to overthrow Donald Trump. TYPICAL BRETT AND NEIL!
DOBBS: The president likes the word "hoax." I prefer the word "overthrow." They're trying to overthrow the President of the United States. They're trying to block his very agenda. They are trying to dismiss him as president of the United States with these ridiculous rulings in which they would allow a local District Attorney to prosecute a sitting President of the United States. That is idiotic, absolutely idiotic, and there is no basis whatsoever in either law or reason to have come to that conclusion.
Oh shut the fuck up, Lou.
If you want more, there's more. Media Matters has Fox News political editor Chris Stirewalt pooping on the notion that Trump should release his taxes, because c'mon, he didn't run for president on a platform of being a good person .
STIREWALT: He's not running for reelection as a good guy, he's not running on high ethical standards. He's running as a rough-and-tumble guy who is from the mean streets of New York real estate, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
I don't know that there's anybody right now who supports Trump that would find out something through this that would say, "Well, this ruins my idea of him as a man of pristine character, da, da, da."
DA DA DA!
Is that 467,923 stupid things yet? Can we end this post now?
Yes, we're going to call that 467,923 and be done.
Katie Pavlich is still the stupidest. The end.
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Anybody who eats her own weight in mosquitoes is Le Awsomissimo to me.
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By now we'd be on the third or fourth round of denying them re-entry.
I'm starting to think it would be a good idea to find a technicality that means the South won and re-do the Reconstruction, but with real high standards for who gets to be a State again. Alabama? Yeah, they get independence until the late 3000s at least.