236 Comments
User's avatar
diogenez's avatar

What is this mythical "far left" of which they speak???

Expand full comment
TerseNurse's avatar

Oh, that'd be me. Mr. Food, Water, Housing and Medicine for all. Commie.

Expand full comment
Zyxomma's avatar

Ta, MM. Since I don't watch TV, I depend on you for all the Sunday show madness. I'm very, very grateful.

Expand full comment
Michael's avatar

Smarmy Mike Johnson reminds me of the teachers pet that the local juvies would beat up behind the Tastee-Freez on Friday nights.

Expand full comment
Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

My Mike Johnson trauma story.

I grew up on a farm and went to Catholic school in town for grades 1-8. I didn't know any of the other kids in my "neighborhood" because "farm." No one in my high school knew me when I started.

I looked exactly like Mike Johnson when I was in ninth grade. Same haircut, same glasses, same general facial features. I grew out of all of those, thank God. As bad as you can imagine that being for a 5'2" freshman, I also looked exactly like the principal, Mr. Hornuckle.

The first day I walked in that school, everyone who saw me for the first time yelled, "Little Hornuckle!"

I hear that every time I see a pic of him.

Expand full comment
Michael's avatar

That's a great story Dan.and I hope my remark wasn't hurtful it was meant to be humorous but I don't suppose talking about people getting beat up is very funny 🙁

I am sometimes pretty callous. Up until middle school because of my personality and size I was s playground bully. That changed forever when a bigger bully took me down. I renounced that path and always considered it a blessing that I got trounced by the high schooler.

Expand full comment
Hannah's avatar

Holy Mike says muscle memory one more time I'm gonna hurl.

Expand full comment
Goonemeritus's avatar

Those kids I stuffed into lockers when we were in High School were totally to blame, Had they been a little more corporative I wouldn't have been forced to do it

Expand full comment
JR's avatar

Choke Schumer's stripes will change back to pussycat within 24 hours.

Expand full comment
Patch's avatar

All he cares about is sweating it out in the Capitol gym with his GOP buddies (I swear if I have to hear that explanation one more f&&king time.

Expand full comment
Wookiee Monster's avatar

Remember, all shutdowns are the fault of the democrats for not letting republicans fuck the country.

Expand full comment
Wookiee Monster's avatar

Chuck is going to die of old age waiting for his friends on the GOP side to take a stand against Krasnov. So will Hakeem Jeffries.

Meet the moment, guys.

Expand full comment
2Cats2Furious's avatar

They can’t, or won’t, meet this moment. Jeffries’ tweet thanking Eric Adams for his service was the final nail in the coffin.

These guys seem to think it’s still business as usual. It’s not, and we the voters understand that, which is why politicians like Mamdani, AOC, and Crockett are so popular right now. The old guard needs to get out of their fucking way.

Expand full comment
Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

As a Boomer friend who's active in Democratic politics said, "No one stepped aside and let us in when we were that age. If you don't like us, run someone."

Expand full comment
TerseNurse's avatar

huh, and I just this moment got a text from the DNC asking me to send them money.

Expand full comment
Michael's avatar

No way, GI would be my reply

Expand full comment
cynmac's avatar

Facebook Reels dished one up featuring Kamala asking for donations to the DNC. The algorithm doesn't know me very well.

Expand full comment
Lady Tavestock's avatar

Before retiring from the DoD as a civilian, I worked for an awful colonel, Colonel Dizzy. In 2018, there was a near shutdown around Valentine's Day. I had plane tickets to go skiing in Vermont and Colonel Dizzy knew it. He made a big deal about mustering a roll call on Friday and dismissing us if the USG shutdown and that we'd be charged with being AWOL if we weren't there. I mentally thought "Fuck you, Dizzy" and made plans to go anyway.

Crazily enough, the House and Senate approved the budget on Thursday night at around midnight and all that remained was for Trump to wake up and sign the budget. Colonel Dizzy was given a reprimand for saying all that shit about mustering a roll call and AWOL nonsense.

I had a wonderful time skiing.

Expand full comment
Goonemeritus's avatar

But Colonel Gillespie played a mean horn

Expand full comment
Hooker P Tape skipping dipshit's avatar

Correction, People who couldn't be bothered to vote "are incapable of learning, and our democracy is fucked for it."

Expand full comment
Axomamma's avatar

See, I'm really confused. Jefferies is out there talking like the House didn't already pass the CR back on September 19. "The measure was approved by a vote of 217 to 212. "

It's all down to fucking Schumer.

#WeAreSoFucked

https://legiscan.com/US/bill/HB5371/2025

Expand full comment
Satanic Pancake's avatar

Load up on undercooked cabbage and broccoli before your meeting, Chuck! You need to be able to lay down some suppressive fire if you're going to survive being in the Trump Stench Zone for any length of time.

Expand full comment
Hooker P Tape skipping dipshit's avatar

and a big bean burrito.

Expand full comment
Bagels of Doom's avatar

Oh, so *now* the NSDAP, I mean GOP, wants to "bipartisan" and "compromise"? Figures.

Expand full comment
Brian McCurdy's avatar

"Have you seen my new glasses? See, I AM capable of changing how I approach the world!"

Expand full comment
Bagels of Doom's avatar

You are a brave soul, Michael.

Expand full comment
TerseNurse's avatar

true dat

Expand full comment
Virgin Monk Boy's avatar

Every shutdown feels like reruns of the same bad sitcom. Mike Johnson plays mob lawyer for Trump, Thune does his best Walmart-brand McConnell impression, and Schumer shows up like the kid who’s just happy to be invited to the party. Meanwhile, millions of people are wondering how to pay rent while these clowns argue over the last slice of pizza.

Blessed be the ones who know “governing” doesn’t mean hostage-taking.

Expand full comment