842 Comments
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Runfastandwin's avatar

The Wombat is short and stout and he will be your friend no doubt.

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Lil Snot's avatar

Gotta love a critter that shits cubes.

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Thatsit Fortheotherwon's avatar

I almost ran out of gas (I wasn't alone) in an Air Force jet once. No cubes, but I did shit a meataxe!

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Zap's avatar

like

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weejee's avatar

Luv totally batty posts Martini. Thanks!

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memzilla's avatar

Hazel the Wombat vs. dryer: https://youtu.be/a0CCdhI2yRA

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Martini Glambassador's avatar

“What the heck just happened?!”

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Shocktreatment's avatar

"Wombats, unlike 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 bats, are wingless and have adequate vision..."

"Are you 𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘦 yer a biologist?"

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Hamilton & The Crew 👉NO👑S👈's avatar

I'm pretty sure if regular bats did not have "adequate" vision they would have been evolutionarily deselected and gone extinct. That does not mean their vision is great compared to other critters. It just means that their vision is adequate for them to survive and reproduce.

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Dave's avatar

radar? sonar?

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Hamilton & The Crew 👉NO👑S👈's avatar

Sonar. I wonder how a bat perceives the world using sonar. Is it like a visual field?

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Shocktreatment's avatar

I dunno, he's still claiming that he's a biologist...

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Menotsure's avatar

I was at a zoo in Florida, when a wombat wrangler left the gate to their area ajar. It was something less than a great escape. One of them kind of waddled quietly out and seemed more than happy to greet the crowd. He or she was gently coaxed back into wombat land.

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Thalia Is Not Amused's avatar

That is the sweetest story! You can tell she felt very safe and loved there.

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Menotsure's avatar

My two girls were kind of thrilled by it.

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Thalia Is Not Amused's avatar

Awwww! How old were they, do you remember?

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Menotsure's avatar

Around 7 and 10.

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Thalia Is Not Amused's avatar

Wow, that's a while ago! What a wonderful memory to share with them.

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Linoleum von Curmudgeon, Esq.'s avatar

How can anyone not like wombats?

It's all in the name! WOMBATS! FTW!

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Kay Ducky's avatar

Not woms. Not bats either. Great job, Eve.

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SkeptiKC's avatar

Wombats are such adorable little creatures. They're the freaky little version of teddy bears on the other side of the globe.

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tehbaddr's avatar

Ground Koalas.

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Nolan Mark's avatar

Take away their cell phones, too.

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Kay Ducky's avatar

Is that what those are!? Weird. Not Republican weird. Just a little bit.

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Linda1961 is woke and proud's avatar

Quirky weird

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Kay Ducky's avatar

The good kind. Like Steven Wright.

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Nolan Mark's avatar

And not Kyrsten Sinema.

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Kay Ducky's avatar

She's still a thing, isn't she?

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Bupkus231's avatar

Is she still running? I saw that Kari Lake won the Republican primary there, and Ruben Gallego has long been the Democratic candidate, but I kinda thought Sinema originally planned to run as an independent.

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algore lactating's avatar

if kamala wins, I bet kyrsten takesover no labels from the corpse of joe liebermann.

if donold wins, kyrsten will be ambassador to india or something similar.

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Nolan Mark's avatar

Sadly, so.

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Babe Paley's avatar

I forget what wombats look like even though in elementary school we had to each write and illustrate a book based on “If You Give a Mouse a Cookie” and mine was If You Give a Wombat Sunscreen.

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SkeptiKC's avatar

You were clearly the precocious kid in your class.

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Crip Dyke's avatar

Give the kitten bread dough so you don't have to knead it yourself.

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Babe Paley's avatar

That would have been clever!

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Martini Glambassador's avatar

I love it!

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Nolan Mark's avatar

Republicans wanna regulate them because they have "womb" in their name.

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Hamilton & The Crew 👉NO👑S👈's avatar

Well, I for one, feel that wombats have the right to choose the shape of their turds.

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Menotsure's avatar

Well, ...that went downhill guickly..

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Hamilton & The Crew 👉NO👑S👈's avatar

But not very far. Wombat turds don't roll very well.

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TootsStansbury 🇺🇦's avatar

They’re like dice, I hear.

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Hamilton & The Crew 👉NO👑S👈's avatar

Praytell, how do they print the dots on them?

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RocktonSam's avatar

Repubs would rather polish turds.

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algore lactating's avatar

polish turds like the pis

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Sojourner Truth's avatar

or smear them at the Capital.

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Hamilton & The Crew 👉NO👑S👈's avatar

"You can't polish a Republican."

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Zap's avatar

You'll just get shit all over your polishing cloth.

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Nolan Mark's avatar

They want UFC poops.

"Enter the Octagon!"

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Hamilton & The Crew 👉NO👑S👈's avatar

Wobmats!! {{{Takes 1379th enormous hit, shrugs, clumsily knocks over Diet Coke}}}

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William Donnell's avatar

Cleanup on aisle crew.

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tehbaddr's avatar

square poop

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William Donnell's avatar

Substackable? Hmmm...

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tehbaddr's avatar

Good for building small shelters.

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Shocktreatment's avatar

New meaning to the term 𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘦...

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Bupkus231's avatar

Before all the buffalo were hunted, settlers would use dried buffalo chips like bricks to build their homesteads. They had the original shithouses

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Nolan Mark's avatar

Collect them all!

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Hamilton & The Crew 👉NO👑S👈's avatar

Li'l Feller makes nice decorative cabinets to store and display your completed sets of wombat poops.

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Nolan Mark's avatar

#poopinets

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Hamilton & The Crew 👉NO👑S👈's avatar

As a construction technology, it stinks.

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tehbaddr's avatar

No man, it's like totally the shit!

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Teen Laqueefa's avatar

OUCH

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tehbaddr's avatar

That's why they make the horrid noises they make!

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Hamilton & The Crew 👉NO👑S👈's avatar

I still haven't figured out how a square sphincter works. Not that I have gone out of my way to find out, mind you.

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William Donnell's avatar

Like an iris with four blades.

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Nolan Mark's avatar
Teen Laqueefa's avatar

Is this where the phrase "talking shit" comes from?

𝑇ℎ𝑒 𝑚𝑎𝑟𝑠𝑢𝑝𝑖𝑎𝑙 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑛 𝑠𝑡𝑎𝑐𝑘𝑠 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑐𝑢𝑏𝑒𝑠 - 𝑡ℎ𝑒 ℎ𝑖𝑔ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑏𝑒𝑡𝑡𝑒𝑟 𝑠𝑜 𝑎𝑠 𝑡𝑜 𝑐𝑜𝑚𝑚𝑢𝑛𝑖𝑐𝑎𝑡𝑒 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑎𝑡𝑡𝑟𝑎𝑐𝑡 𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑤𝑜𝑚𝑏𝑎𝑡𝑠.

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algore lactating's avatar

chat shit get banged (sexually)

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Hamilton & The Crew 👉NO👑S👈's avatar

Consider me informed. {{{takes yet another picket-crossing hit, opens second diet coke, shrugs again, calls self a scab}}}

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tehbaddr's avatar

Eat some Lego, do the experiment!

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Alternative Dog's avatar

Perhaps I missed it but in that crazy ass story about the judge and her raucous house party, did Carter ever find the key to his mom's SUV? It's really bugging me because about 25% of that legal document has to do with the lost key.

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CI Carlson's avatar

Happy capabara or wombat day

(whatever the « tab » rodent is)

and can someone make Louis DeJoy go away

(who’s turning mail into schizz).

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mvario's avatar

New Jersey Trying To Salvage Its Sketchy AF Infant DNA Harvesting Program By Claiming It’s All About Health | Techdirt

https://www.techdirt.com/2024/08/02/new-jersey-trying-to-salvage-its-sketchy-af-infant-dna-harvesting-program-by-claiming-its-all-about-health/

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Ward From Cali's avatar

'Trix: "Democrats having EVENTS. I’ve found both a brunch and a happy hour for Kamala near me just in the next week. See what’s near you!" (link in main post)

And of course, if there's nothing readily available, you could just do your own event or outreach, there's nothing stopping you! I spent an evening on outreach to the Youngs last week at the local college watering hole, it's a nice casual way of doing things and I'm good in that environment. I'm planning to head over again next week, after the V.P. announcement, assuming that happens as reported.

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SoBe Smirched's avatar

List of Trumps Worst Hires

1. AOTK

Haven’t clicked on the article. Does it have their Scaramucci Ratings of Longevity?

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fuflans's avatar

scaramucci was seriously the best trump hire.

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Emil Muz's avatar

On the subject of the knife attack, there was street rioting by the right wingers and a fence/wall in front of the mosque got damaged. Some guys who def looked like proper English working class tough guys came out to help the Muslims who were repairing the fence.

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subterrene's avatar

Harris/Walz is quite mellifluous

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OneYieldRegular's avatar

Why would anyone - even William Fucking Buckley - want to be on the wrong side of James Baldwin?

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Runfastandwin's avatar

I know it's petty, but again I feel the need to point out how all the Wonkette legal eagles called me a petulant child when I posited that judges have no restraint on their activity. You guys can GFY.

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Blanche de Shambles's avatar

Yes the EDL is terrible, and yes they are exploiting a tragedy in order to provoke disgusting mob violence, but they did provide us with that video of that one thug getting absolutely whanged in the cobblers by a brick thrown from his own side. More like that, please.

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OneYieldRegular's avatar

Doesn't Robby Starbuck realize that he name is associated with the gayest 19th century American novel ever written?

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Emil Muz's avatar

Wasn't the lead character on Battlestar Galactica named Starbuck, or am I having a stroke?

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OneYieldRegular's avatar

As I recall, Battlestar Galactica frequently mined "Moby Dick" for inspiration.

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CI Carlson's avatar

No, I think it was « Dick Tracy. »

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Blanche de Shambles's avatar

A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court? I'm not sure what you mean.

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OneYieldRegular's avatar

Off by a whale. A big white whale.

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Blanche de Shambles's avatar

Oh, right- of course. The Age of Innocence.

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CI Carlson's avatar

I think he’s referring to « The Boys of summer. »

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Aquaman, Real Estate Investor.'s avatar

I followed the link and read the whole ruling on the Judge who was at her friends party full of drunken teenagers.

That was a rollercoaster!

But the commission ruled that she should be removed, which is nice. Cause she sounds like an absolute trainwreck.

I imagine any black defendants who can afford decent lawyers (sigh, I know) are going to bring up her apparent bias at appeals and such.

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Runfastandwin's avatar

Better late than never I guess.

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William Donnell's avatar

Perhaps Evan's condition was conditioned on being in, a quantum Evan.

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JoannaJeannineJanet's avatar

Happy James Baldwin's 100th birthday!

https://nmaahc.si.edu/object/nmaahc_2011.132.5.4

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Second Laws's avatar

Hoo boy, 81 fucking minutes, and he walked out of there under his own power. "The police encounter with Michael Spadone began at 1 a.m. After 81 minutes of back-talk, insults and threats, he was arrested." #howdoIknowheswhite

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