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Notreelyhelping's avatar

So a badger and a wolverine go into a bar, and immediately patrons and staff scream and panic and run out the back door.

At which point the badger and wolverine look at each and say simultaneously: “Dude. You need to get those musk glands drained.”

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Homero's avatar

I used to think wolverines were lady wolves, I mean lady foxes are known as vixens.

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Zyxomma's avatar

You made this comment 10 hours ago, so I don't know whether or not you'll see my reply. An Australian radio call in show asked questions of callers. If they knew the answers, they won prizes. A young woman called in. Her question was "What is an ocarina?" and she answered, "A female Australian?"

Not everyone will get it; I laughed uproariously. An ocarina is a small wind instrument, usually made of clay. One blows into a hole at one end, and different pitches are achieved by obscuring holes on the body.

"Ocker" is Aussie slang for an uncultivated, uncouth Australian, usually derogatory but occasionally used affectionately.

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Homero's avatar

I’d wondered what an Ocarina is but not enough to look it up before

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Kirsty Gnome's avatar

Wolverettes.

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JanuaryClaire's avatar

Cozy little fuzzballs!

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TootsStansbury 🇺🇦's avatar

Baby American Tasmanian Devils! Whhhhhhhoooooorrrrrrrrrrr

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Nancy Naive's avatar

Saw a documentary on some guy in Alaska who is/was the most successful breeder of wolverines for release into the wild. However one of the pups was unable to be released for some reason and he raised it as a pet. The interaction between the two was hysterical. It was like a Labrador Retriever “crazy dogging” on steroids. Wouldn’t leave the guy alone.

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weejee's avatar

They can get grumpy when they grow up. Saw on focused on the ground bump into a sapling and then tear the wee tree to bits.

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Nancy Naive's avatar

Well, when a grizzly walks a mile outta the way to avoid one, it kinda says it all.

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Shocktreatment's avatar

"Wolverines —including those at the zoo—value their privacy..."

Shrewd, smart, fierce creatures... And cute, from enough distance (fierce).

When I was young, people did business by actual mail, including bill collectors. My father used to reply sometimes, this was a memorable one:

"In deepest, most sincere expression of my gratitude for your concern, under separate cover, I have sent you a bag of wolverines. For fullest enjoyment, place your head in the bag and inhale deeply..."

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WokeGrandma's avatar

Thank you! Most chuckleworthy!

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NatalyaResists's avatar

It's all cute and snuggly 'til they rip your face off!!!

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Resource NW's avatar

Perhaps if we sent wolverines instead of leopards?

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PRW's avatar

That's what Canadian MAGA get.

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Eileen's avatar

"Steal your face right off your head...."

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Linda1961 is woke and proud's avatar

As babbys, they are cute!

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Homero's avatar

"...just like the Rolling Stones"

--Kryten

(paraphrasing)

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The Wanderer's avatar

Largest weasels in the world, take zero shits from any other animal in the woods, and is clever enough to hunt a human hunter.

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CambridgeKnitter's avatar

But can still be stomped by a Spartan.

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Mr. Minky's avatar

I don't think I want to fall into a boogle of wolverines.

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Mr. Minky's avatar

Those ain't wolverines. Wolverines look like they fight crime for the LA Rams.

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Free beach's avatar

I thought they were high school kids that fight a guerrilla war against Russians invading the US.

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JCfromNC's avatar

Y'know, that movie seems a tiny bit more believable after the last year in Ukraine.

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Free beach's avatar

Da comrade!

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tehbaddr's avatar

Furocious!

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BlueSpot's avatar

Donald Trump always says that a huge loss is a big win for him. The bigger the loss, the bigger the win he claims. He lost "bigly" in the Supreme Court last night, so he has to claim a "bigly" win.

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AthenaH2SO4's avatar

It looks like some of the guys behind Dampnut were struggling to not laugh at him.

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Wookiee Monster's avatar

Man, I thought Tucker “tan your balls” Carlson had issues with his masculinity, but Jesse has the full subscription.

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Kirsty Gnome's avatar

I listened to Rebecca and even recorded her for posteriority!

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Jjamie's avatar

Very cool!

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Hellsbells69's avatar

OT, But can anyone tell me where I can connect with organizers for protests scheduled for April 19 in Austin TX? Are any other Austin Wonketteers planning to attend? I searched 50501, MoveOn, Indivisible but the closest I could find is Houston. There are no scheduled events for Austin which is weird, nor could I find any mention of local organizers to contact. Also, does anyone know where I can get merch? Google and Duck Duck Go had no search results; the only MoveOn has Hands Off files to download for signs, but the downloads from my iPhone and iPad were all disproportionate - the only formats available are png and jpeg, and I couldn’t figure out how to edit them.

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The Blessed Reverend's avatar

The night was dark like one black dire wolf! The wind blew, the snow snew. The robber band was seated around the camp filre. Just then! "Come Allonzo! Tell us a story!' and thus Allonzo began:

.

The night was dark like one black dire wolf! The wind blew, the snow snew. The robber band was seated around the camp filre. Just then! "Come Allonzo! Tell us a story!' and thus Allonzo began:

.

The night was dark like one black dire wolf! The wind blew, the snow snew. The robber band was seated around the camp filre. Just then! "Come Allonzo! Tell us a story!' and thus Allonzo began:

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Hello_who_dis's avatar

"I want to feed your fingertips to the wolverines."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rdWAGFLnOUg

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Heidi L's avatar

Couldn't read The Atlantic piece because paywalls, but it looked like it might address the whole "antisemitism vs. anti-Zionism" issue. Hating Jewish people for being Jewish? Antisemitism and not justifiable. Hating what the State of Israel is doing to the Palestinians? Anti-Zionism and justifiable. Conflating the two? Cheap and easy excuse to deport people exercising their right to free speech in defense of Palestinians.

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PRW's avatar

"What’s next, kids identifying as dire wolves and demanding to be addressed as “HOOOOUUUUUWWWWWWWWWWWWWL!!!!11!!” at school?" That, and the requiring that you beg of them not to murder you; pleeease, don't murder me ...

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Biff52, aka Scum's avatar

"Editrix Rebecca will be on the Tavis Smiley show today! Deets: 9-10 Pacific/12-1 Eastern[...]"

Got to the end of the article at 9:58 AM Pacific, right on time as usual. There better be a recording later!

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Steely_Fan's avatar

When I awoke, the dire wolf

600 pounds of sin

Was grinning at my window

All I said was, "Come on in"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VWY4hyIlsqQ

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Karen Krebser's avatar

Ooooh, Matteo Lane is hilarious! Yay

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Kirsty Gnome's avatar

KBLA, there's an app for that!

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Dialectic.Detective's avatar

I like it.

Tariffs - https://xkcd.com/3073/

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Sister Artemis's avatar

That bit about oh-so-pious Mike Johnson up at the top made me think of this:

Al Franken, from “Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them”

“We love America just as much as they do. But in a different way. You see, they love America like a 4-year-old loves his mommy. Liberals love America like grown-ups. To a 4-year-old, everything Mommy does is wonderful and anyone who criticizes Mommy is bad. Grown-up love means actually understanding what you love, taking the good with the bad and helping your loved one grow. Love takes attention and work and is the best thing in the world.”

I might add mature love for something includes the ability to realize that what you may have once appreciated is now toxic and to be avoided, thwarted at all costs.

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Zyxomma's avatar

I have that Franken quote printed; it hangs from the bottom of the wall calendar in my office.

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