This Former CIA Chief Dude Is A Goddamn Psychic, Like OH HEY MISS CLEO!

Left: CNN guy; Right: Miss Cleo

This past weekend, former CIA chief Michael Hayden, who was appointed by Republican Gee-Dubya Bush, visited Michael Smerconishat the CNN Fake News Network, to talk about Donald Trump's bullshit assertion that he was the victim of a "wire tapp" by Obama in Trump Tower. We didn't share the video with you earlier, because we just didn't. But NOW we want to share it, because it turns out that Michael Hayden is a goddamned psychic, or maybe just a former CIA chief who's been watching the smegma balloons in the Trump White House and can totally predict their moves before they even think of them.

Hayden told Smerconish he believes that, instead of actually doubling down on Trump's original assertion -- the Obama "wire tapp" thing -- that the fuckers squatting in the White House would instead pivot to a new charge, namely that they'd suddenly start acting as if ALL ALONG Trump was saying he was worried that U.S. Persons in his inner circle (like disgraced foreign agent /former national security adviser Michael Flynn) had been picked up, completely innocently, in "incidental" surveillance, and that evil Obam-unist holdovers in the Deep State were "unmasking" those people to make them look bad. Hayden noted that the pivot had already begun, in Trump's recent interview with Tucker Carlson. Specifically, here is what Trump told Carlson:  

But wiretap covers a lot of different things. I think you’re going to find some very interesting items coming to the forefront over the next two weeks.

"Over the next two weeks," huh? That's a lot more foreboding than the time Trump told Tucker Carlson that his own curly locks might not be as luscious as Tucker's, but that Trump gets WAY more pussy! That was just gross.

Let's look at Hayden's quote, and then we will show you how goddamned psychic he is:

SMERCONISH: Where is it going, and what concerns General Michael Hayden the most?

HAYDEN: [...] I found that interview with the president and Tucker Carlson quite interesting. Some folks said that he was doubling down on his claim -- actually, I don't think so. I think he was picking up his chips and going to another table. He was backing away from the literal accusation that President Obama had ... ordered the wiretapping of Trump and Trump Tower. I think where this is going ... and I think this is the lifeline that the administration is hoping they can grab onto, is something called "incidental collection."

Hayden then explained "incidental collection," like say if we are monitoring the Russian ambassador or a Russian oligarch, and the Trump team is SEXUALLY SNAPCHATTING THOSE RUSSIANS EVERY MINUTE OF EVERY HOUR, then they are going to get picked up! Usually, a U.S. citizen would be "masked," because as Hayden notes, we're "targeting the foreigner," but sometimes the "U.S. person" can be "unmasked," and Hayden says we have normal, legal procedures for doing that when there's a good reason.

[wonkbar]<a href="https: //wonkette.substack.com/p/omg-sean-spicer-stop-trying-to-make-wire-tapps-a-thing-they-will-never-be-a-thing"></a>[/wonkbar]So what happened afterMiss CleoMichael Hayden said that? Well first, there was that House Intelligence Committee hearing on Monday, where James Comey both confirmed the FBI investigation into Team Trump's collusion with Russia, and also pissed all over Trump's "wire tapp" lies. At Monday's White House daily briefing , Press Secretary Sean Spicer DOUBLED DOWN on the "wire tapp" claims, with the specific whine that WAAAAAAH! Michael Flynn's communications with the Russian ambassador got picked up, WAAAAAAAH! This is the exact same pivot Hayden predicted. It is ALSO the same pivot Wonkette, who is Miss Cleo's sister apparently, noted at the time of Spicer's presser. If we may reblog ourselves:

[CBS White House correspondent Margaret Brennan] specifically wanted to know what Spicer meant by “who it was,” reminding him that we are talking about Trump’s lie about getting a “wire tapp” done on his fanny, not this “waaaaaaah Michael Flynn!” pivot Trump and his dickhole minions in Congress are trying out.

That's right, WE picked up on it, and that is because we are expert SPY BLOGGERS.

[wonkbar]<a href="https: //wonkette.substack.com/p/dumbass-trump-slut-devin-nunes-needs-to-sit-the-fuck-down"></a>[/wonkbar]BUT THEN! Then we had House Intelligence Committee Chair Devin Nunes on Wednesday, throwing those two dog-and-pony show pressers about how he has found OMG TOTALLY BREAKING NEWS information (that he STILL hasn't shared with the rest of his committee, that fucking troll) about how the Trump team TOTALLY INNOCENTLY got picked up in "legal, incidental" surveillance related to Not Russia, but that these sinless angels were having their pure and good names "unmasked" by unknown devils in the intelligence community, therefore TRUMP RUSSIA TREASON INVESTIGATION OVER, NOTHING TO SEE HERE!

So it looks like Hayden was right!

[wonkbar]<a href="https: //wonkette.substack.com/p/no-for-real-though-is-donald-trump-a-russian-intelligence-asset"></a>[/wonkbar]But if we may briefly go back to that Tucker Carlson quote we pasted above, remember how Trump seemed to suggest he'd be vindicated "over the next two weeks"? Excuse us, Crown Prince Pussgrab, but how did you know that ? Did Trump have a little sexxxy secret meeting with one Mr. Congresstwat Devin Nunes, because they KNEW the hearing was going to go bad for them? Is that when Nunes promised Trump he had a plan to throw a dildo in the gears of the investigation, to protect the (alleged) Russian intelligence asset currently spreading its flaky orange ass cheeks all over the Oval Office? WHAT DID DEVIN NUNES KNOW, AND WHEN DID HE KNOW IT?

We are just asking questions.

Anyway, Michael Hayden's other prediction in the video above is that the Trump regime will try to use this new whining about getting "unmasked" in intelligence reports as a way to criminalize intelligence gathering, so hey, everybody, have a really good day, OK?

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[ CNN ]