Here is a pressing question that might be keeping you up nights, particularly if you live in whatever district in Missouri Todd Akin (R-Ladiesman) represents: What if you want to tell Todd Akin how much he sucks? How do you know he will listen to you and absorb what is sure to be thoughtful and nuanced commentary about how much he sucks? Well, your Wonkette is here to help! It's very easy to get in touch with Todd Akin and tell him how much he sucks, you just write a check, preferably for a “substantial amount," and this will get his attention. Here, watch him explain to you in this video about how you get your Congressman’s attention (hint: send him muneez.)
Look, if a two or three hundred Wonketters will pitch in $25 each I bet we could get Akin to sit down with us. And drink the LSD-spiked glass of iced tea I will be giving him.
<i>They write me a decent check. I remember that. The people that I thought were friends that tell me to go away because they are supporting someone else, I remember that. You know, I can remember back to 12 years ago. You remember who&rsquo;s helping you...</i>
Except he won&#039;t recognize your face later.
You&#039;d have to drop trou, and then, well, illegitimate things would happen ...
An honest politician, at least while discussing corruption.
His buttcrack? Scans Mastercards.
BAM! Right in his surveyor&#039;s marks!
Doh! You must have seen it too?!
An EBay logo trampstamp is <i>way</i> more subtle, Todd.
Look, if a two or three hundred Wonketters will pitch in $25 each I bet we could get Akin to sit down with us. And drink the LSD-spiked glass of iced tea I will be giving him.
<blockquote>You remember who&rsquo;s helping you. </blockquote>
47% take note.
Maybe Honey Boo Boo could help him show how a dollar makes him holler.
What was that noise at 58 seconds? The fist of an angry god?
<i>They write me a decent check. I remember that. The people that I thought were friends that tell me to go away because they are supporting someone else, I remember that. You know, I can remember back to 12 years ago. You remember who&rsquo;s helping you...</i>
HAHAHAHAHAHHA dude thinks he matters!!