16 Comments
User's avatar
Vienna Woods's avatar

I obviously know the wrong people, as no one in my circle of family/friends have had a DUI.

Vienna Woods's avatar

So he can get a hug from The Boss, is why.

Monsieur_Grumpe's avatar

I thought I saw a spackle-brained dick weasel once but it turned out to be a gravy sucking weasel. It was easy mistake to make.

Vienna Woods's avatar

Yet <a href="http:\/\/www.hollywoodreporter.com\/news\/samuel-l-jackson-highest-grossing-actor-guinness-book-world-records-254155" target="_blank">Samuel L</a> is the highest-grossing actor of all time.

Vienna Woods's avatar

To be fair, Harry Reid was doing the same thing back in 07 to stop Bush from making some recess appointments.

Vienna Woods's avatar

"spackle-brained dick weasel"

Oh Gary, I think I'm in love.

Comrade Wingtardd's avatar

Cardinals are stupid (but pretty). For weeks I wondered what bird could be shitting all over the sides of my parked car, then I saw a cardinal one day sitting on the door staring at himself in the sideview mirror and shitting. Some sort of weird Narcissus thing going on with them.

𝔅𝔢𝔢𝔩𝔷𝔢𝔟𝔲𝔟𝔟𝔞's avatar

Not "Motile turds"? We'll have to ask an expert.

𝔅𝔢𝔢𝔩𝔷𝔢𝔟𝔲𝔟𝔟𝔞's avatar

Let's just say it's within commuting distance.

𝔅𝔢𝔢𝔩𝔷𝔢𝔟𝔲𝔟𝔟𝔞's avatar

That's my excuse, and I'm sticking with it.

Spotts1701, Taking Bible Guns's avatar

Six words:

"Speaker of the House Michelle Bachmann."

Spotts1701, Taking Bible Guns's avatar

It didn't work when Senator Coburn demanded offsets after McVeigh blew the Murrah Federal Building and 168 Americans up. Why should now be any different?

Spotts1701, Taking Bible Guns's avatar

Oh great, he's going to be this generation's Strom Thurmond - they'll have to hire a staffer just to make sure he's still breathing when they need him to hold a filibuster.

BarackMyWorld's avatar

Their seats are safe, though. In Oklahoma, you could run Timothy McVeigh as a candidate in the general election and as long as he was a Republican he'd win.

BarackMyWorld's avatar

Eating brains may be his closest to having one.

𝔅𝔢𝔢𝔩𝔷𝔢𝔟𝔲𝔟𝔟𝔞's avatar

Crop subsidies to OK agribusiness would seem like the perfect place for offsets in spending. Should free up a few billion right there. And dropping the tax breaks for OK oil and gas companies would easily pay for everything. Inhofe and Coburn will propose this, of course, the day after hell freezes over.