310 Comments
Sep 22, 2023·edited Sep 22, 2023

Is anyone preparing a production of "King Lear" with the title actor in a rubber Rupert mask?

Nobody? Yeah, great, now I have to do fucking *every*thing?

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If you want something done, give it to a busy person! Congratulations!

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This puts me in the mind of ditty by Mr. Sturgill Simpson:

"Well now, Lord, if you can hear me, Won't you throw a damn dog a bone?

'Cause if the Devil shows up with a better deal, This old soul's a-goin' down

Oh, I sing 'em real pretty, sing 'em real sad, And all the people in the crowd say "He ain't half-bad"

Well, they call me King Turd up here on Shit Mountain

If you want, you can have the crown."

Take it away Lachlan...

(edited for spelling...)

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Presumably there’s some kind of containment field or “nursing home” where he and Kissinger can while away their last few years? Hell had a cage for that in Supernatural.

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"Bring me the head of Janine Pirro, that I may feed.”

-

Be careful, dearest Demon Uncle Rupie. Drinking Judge Boxwine's blood may cause you to become super drunk for the rest of your existence. ;-)

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Liches can "live" a while...

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Obviously Junior was just the best person for the job. No nepotism here 🤣

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OK, Disgusting, Mucoid, Throne of Filth, Excreted Fetid Minds (future glam-goo band?)

But BEST of all: ENSHITTEN

And I'm only on the 2nd paragraph! I understood once I saw the subject matter!

Still laughing, great work!

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Enshittification is a technical term in economics. From the wikipedia page:

"Enshittification, also known as platform decay,[1] is a way to describe the pattern of decreasing quality of online platforms that act as two-sided markets."

"Here is how platforms die: first, they are good to their users; then they abuse their users to make things better for their business customers; finally, they abuse those business customers to claw back all the value for themselves. Then, they die. I call this enshittification, and it is a seemingly inevitable consequence arising from the combination of the ease of changing how a platform allocates value, combined with the nature of a “two sided market,” where a platform sits between buyers and sellers, hold each hostage to the other, raking off an ever-larger share of the value that passes between them.[2]"

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Sep 22, 2023·edited Sep 22, 2023

Honey, is my platform decaying? I hate when THAT happens! Now ya made me look stuff up and learn things and my head's full again! Sounds kinda self-defeating (que parasitoid). OK this is gross but we ARE discussing shit! (kind of) I noticed the word right after returning home to find that my sweet but antique sheepdog had enshittified (?) the kitchen. I really regret not choosing my next steps more carefully, as I thusly enshitted (?) not one but both shoes - encountering a substance not seen or smelled since toddlers roamed the house - (part algae part toxic waste, you remember!) and you always know the second your shoe goes slideways in a stinky version of TX Calichie clay (suck the shoe right off your foot!) But my 12-YO Old English co-pilot & all-around BFF tried, and didn't crap in my boot like a common Fat Freddy's cat! (My fav character... and Commander Cockroach, but then I digress!)

OK, my work here is dung! (I'll show myself out)

=============================>>>>>>>>>>

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After single handedly destroying the news media in the entire English speaking world, Rupert ambles off into the sunset, his work done.

Let’s hope Satan calls in his marker soon.

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If Ben Franklin's spirit was reanimated he'd be appalled at the media consolidation that the United States Government has allowed. Reagan set this up.

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Sep 22, 2023·edited Sep 22, 2023

This is just beautifully written, Dok. Bravo.

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Hmmm. Some possible reasons I can think of...

1. Something REALLY bad is coming down the pike and he wants to be out of the top job for plausible deniability.

2. Lachlan got sick of waiting and called in his favours from Cthulhu.

3. His human suit is rapidly failing, and all the rituals have been unsuccessful. Now he's run out of babies.

4. The Metamorphosis has become too advanced to hide. He must burrow underground and await the death of the sun, when he may emerge to seek a mate.

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Oh noes! I accidently submitted the discount code Lorelei. Now I'm being sent a complete discography

of Celtic Women. Works for me.

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author

Doc, a little warning next time! I’m eating here!

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It's funny that your saying that considering wonkette is lebaled a misinformation news website on ad fonts media chart.

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author

LOL.

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Sep 23, 2023Liked by Rebecca Schoenkopf

Oh no the ad fonts media chart.

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Sep 22, 2023Liked by Rebecca Schoenkopf

*You're

*labeled

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A better requiem for that soul destroying asshole has yet to be written.

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"Bye, Bye Asshole " carved into the tombstone would be both frugal & concise.

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Maybe paint a fly on it.

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This MAGA/Q thing needs a good 'Jonestown' type cleaning.

Can I say that? (....probably not)

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I thought they'd get there when their GodManKing told them to drink bleach, but no such luck

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“It was not reported whether the elder Murdoch will transfer his dark soul-consuming contract with the legions of Hell itself to Lachlan, or if Lachlan will seal a new agreement with the Unholy One in an arcane ritual on an altar of human bones at Fox News in New York City.”

this is art, Dok.

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Dok sure knows how to work a keyboard to best advantage.

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