200 Comments
User's avatar
Gingerwentworth's Theory's avatar

Maybe you get penis-oriented when day after day you're cinching up super-tight belts around the a the dicks of tame male steers and horses so they'll go wild (with pain!) and buck. Which probably makes him (the clown) seem funnier when he arrives.

President Rufus T. Firefly's avatar

That's one of my recurring nightmares!

schmannity's avatar

Rick Scott would upcode and double bill.

Truly Madly Derply's avatar

Well, among other things, this guy seems to have proscribed yet another gender role. Is "I wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire" now to be the strict provenance of males? What will be the female equivalent in Rodeo Clown's Scared New (Old) World? "I wouldn't blood coming out of my wherever on you if you were on fire?"Seriously dude--that's the best example you could come up with? Peeing on a fire? Granted, I don't know much about rodeos. Maybe it's the event after the bronco busting?

RogationDays's avatar

Clowns are creepy to begin with without being drunk racist assholes

whitroth's avatar

Well, Wonkette, as you know <takes drag="" on="" pipe="">, rodeo clowns go into barrels so that when a brahma bull has bucked off his rider, and is still angry, they can distract the bull, and the bull will often attack the barrel they're in, which protects them from the deadly horns and hooves.

This does, in turn, call into question his life choices....

dshwa's avatar

At least the bull riders can get laid, even if it's just their cousins.

BigBoppa - Yeah, that one's avatar

Pro tip: Campfires are really hot and kids are really short. So kids, please do not pee on a campfire or your tinkler will end up looking like ground beef or portions of Roger Ailes..

Now, back to our regularly scheduled programming.

sarah_kay_gee ⚜️🏰⭐'s avatar

I'm not scared of clowns, I just loathe them with a fiery passion. This fuckstick ain't doing anything to change that.

calliecallie's avatar

First time I heard this story, I thought of a phrase my son is very fond of: "Who does this clown think he is?"

Grokenstein's avatar

http://www.themarysue.com/w...

"YOU USE THE BATHROOM I TELL YOU TO USE!!"

Courser's avatar

LOLOL! I often say that my family wouldn't cross the street to piss on me if I was on fire! It works for me because all of my living relatives are male (only girl, here).

Also, too, eewwwwww....

aureolamanita's avatar

Those poor balloon animals ...

John Norris's avatar

IIRC, didn't Glen Beck describe himself as a rodeo clown?

Cat Cafe's avatar

Hillary just tinkled on the dumpster fire that is the Trump campaign, bigly!